Waiter: Yes, Baron. What should we start with, Baron? Hmm?
Gaston: Oh yes. That's not so easy. Beginnings are always difficult.
Waiter: Yes, Baron.
Gaston: If Casanova suddenly turned out to be Romeo having supper with Juliet, who might become Cleopatra, how would you start?
Waiter: I would start with cocktails.
It later transpires that the elegant American lady coming to dinner is as crooked as the fake Baron, himself. Each is apparently so good at pickpocketing they could easily make any team in BG2:
Lily: I like you, Baron.
Gaston: I'm crazy about you. By the way, your pin. (He returns her brooch pin - after appraising it.)
Lily: (after suddenly noticing she's missing it) Thank you, Baron.
Gaston: Not at all. There's one very good stone in it.
Lily: What time is it? (She allows him to search for his pocket watch before looking startled. She hands it to him from her purse.) It was five minutes slow but I regulated it for you. (He pockets the watch with a smile.)
Gaston: I hope you don't mind if I keep your garter. (She checks her leg, under the table, and then Gaston holds the garter up high and kisses it to prove his expertise.)
Lily: Darling! (excitedly, she rises and kisses him, flinging herself into his arms) Oh now, darling. Tell me, tell me all about yourself. Who are you?
Gaston: You remember the man who walked into the Bank of Constantinople, and walked out with the Bank of Constantinople?
Lily: Monescu.
Gaston: Gaston Monescu.
Lily: Gaston!
One more. Later on, Gaston formulates a plan to enter the employ of the rich, young heir to the Colet fortune, and then rob her safe. He poses as a wealthy man who has lost his riches in the stock market crash, and is now looking for a position as a private secretary. It's plain, though, that sparks are flying:
Gaston/LaValle: In times like these when everything is uncertain, every conservative person should have a substantial part of his fortune within arm's reach.
Mme. Colet: Um, hmm. That sounds sensible. Hm, hmm. Yes. Very sensible. Very very clever.
Gaston/LaValle: Madame. I think you deserve a good scolding. First, you lose your bag.
Mme. Colet: Then I mislay my checkbook.
Gaston/LaValle: Then you use the wrong lipstick.
Mme. Colet: And how I handle my money.
Gaston/LaValle: It's disgraceful.
Mme. Colet: Tell me, Monsieur LaValle. What else is wrong?
Gaston/LaValle: Everything! Madame Colet, if I were your father, which fortunately I am not, and you made any attempt to handle your own business affairs, I would give you a good spanking (she turns toward him) - in a business way, of course.
Mme. Colet: What would you do if you were my secretary?
Gaston/LaValle: The same thing.
Mme. Colet: (She leans back provocatively and smiles sensuously.) You're hired.
Great fun, the whole movie. Now out (finally) on DVD, and well worth a viewing.
