GameBanshee Forums

A little Southern bashing - Bill Maher said it, not me

From last week's Real Time With Bill Maher:

And finally, New Rule: Southerners have to at least consider voting for candidates from the North.
North Carolina Senator John Edwards has a powerful argument in his bid to be the Democratic nominee when he says, 'What I give people is a candidate who can win everywhere in America.' Translation: 'We Southerners ain't gonna vote for no Yankee. You suckers up north will take our Clintons and Carters, but we just ain't buyin' Kerrys and Deans.'

And that's a shame, not just for Democrats, but for democracy itself. And I feel bad for the millions of intelligent people who live in a region still dominated by so much prejudice that anyone who wants to be president better have a twang in his voice and pronounce all for 'e's' in the word '****.'

I'm sorry, but responding only to people who look and sound like you is small-minded. So if Southerners don't want to have an inferiority complex, I say, stop doing things that make reasonable people think you're inferior. Like getting rid of slavery was a good start. But don't stop there. Stop being the place that's always challenging the theory of evolution.

What's next to challenge? Gravity? Is that just a plot by the Jews up north to get people to drop spare change?

And I like the South. I love to party there. But Southerners need to let go of the Civil War, beginning with those re-enactments. First of all, you're re-enacting something you lost. It's one thing to gloat about victory, but when you do it about losing, your front porch is a few couches short of being decorated.

The time has come to move on. The time has come to consider ' just consider ' voting for a Yankee. Howard Dean's Vermont and John Kerry's Massachusetts are no longer where carpetbaggers come from. Carpet munchers, yes. That, we have established.

But there is no good reason that America, at this late date, still needs to be a house divided. At bottom, we all want the same things: dignity, security and someone to slap the crap out of Janet Jackson.

lmao!

Originally posted by dragon wench
Probably Though there are compensations in keeping some people at a distance

This explains Canada's low immigration rate!

Voo: Dare I ask? What's a carpet muncher?

Originally posted by Gwalchmai
This explains Canada's low immigration rate!

Voo: Dare I ask? What's a carpet muncher?

Well I suspect Aegis also has something to do with the low immigration rate

Um.... I'm not sure the definition to the tern "carpet muncher" can be detailed in an all ages forum.. LMAO!

Re: A little Southern bashing - Bill Maher said it, not me

Originally posted by VoodooDali
From last week's Real Time With Bill Maher:

aaaaaaaakkkkkkk. Inflamatory. Provocative. Trolling. I insist we have Bill Maher banned from the forum. How dare he say such things about the south of England....

Gravity, indeed. Let's get serious, please

Originally posted by CM
Does this mean i have edit all my posts?

yeah, and get my damn name outta them while you're at it

@Ysh....mock all you will, you know you love me I assume the fas bashing is from the heart though

@DW....Don't worry about the thread, most southerners I know are so proud of the accent, they diliberatly exagerate it anyway when they go north

Originally posted by Gwalchmai
Voo: Dare I ask? What's a carpet muncher?

Just in case you were serious, I'd reccomend you google it. Results might be non work safe, though

My 68-year-old mother has lived in Texas all her life. She knows very little about computers and the internet, bless her heart, but she has recently learned how to use email, and she is now in the habit of forwarding all sorts of junk to me and everyone else she knows. As a result, I regularly receive guides like this ("How to Speak Like a Texan" and so forth) in my In-Box. Clearly, she is on a mission to make sure that everyone in the world knows how to understand people like her, if not actually speak like her. Far from being offended by such articles, she would thank you for proliferating them. I mean, really, let's get with the program.

On a personal note, I'd like to make it clear that I don't take anything I see on the internet to heart. This is the internet, for crying out loud. You don't need to pass a test or acquire the approval of an editor to post messages on the internet; people can say pretty much anything they want without having to worry about minor matters such as proof, credibility, or accountability. So why in the world do people take things so seriously?

When it comes to expressing personal opinions, I'm all in favor of free speech to the max. I'm very serious about that. If your opinion is different from mine, I don't care; you're entitled to your own opinion, and I encourage you to expostulate to your heart's content. If you want to spout a bunch of nonsense that only makes you look silly, be my guest. If you want some rope, I'll give you as much as you need to hang yourself. I mean, I'm really not going to get upset over anything someone has to say, especially not on the frigging internet.

@VonDondu, lol @ your grandmother ! My mother-in-law is much the same... and in her new found ability to use email she repeatedly spams up my inbox with all kinds of junk.

I think you allude to some interesting points regarding the internet. While I obviously know the difference between a virtual community and a 3D one, I do nonetheless see many similarities and parallels between the two. I have actually made some very good friends here at SYM. These are people with whom I chat on IM, and often on the phone (I love my flat monthly long distance rate )... And time and cash permitting I would actually like to meet these individuals in person.
I'm not certain there are that many differences between 'virtual' friendships and those that occur in "RL."
In the wider scope, it is also that I find SYM a very special community, and I am sensitive to the various currents and conflicts that have rocked the place over the last year. In that regard, I do not especially want to contribute to the tension. I have looked at other forums.. and SYM/GB isn't just any place on the internet.

As I said earlier though, I think last night I was just tired and had drank a tad too much red wine, so hence my overstated concern. Looking at it now I can see quite clearly that there was no need for me to be worried

Bah, buncha carpet baggers.

It's "Hah tuh Tawk Suthun." Get it right, by cracky!

Originally posted by dragon wench
Um.... I'm not sure the definition to the tern "carpet muncher" can be detailed in an all ages forum.. LMAO!

Last time I checked, the word "lesbian" wasn't censored.

@Vicsun don't tell our dear innocent Gwally to do things like that!

Well, ah swar. Here's something that my mother forwarded to me last night. It's a variation on dragon wench's list. NOTE: I hope the folks from Arkansas and Alabama don't take offense.

Subject: "Southern Y'allbonics"

Northerners will have to learn how to understand us--
The Southern Association of Colleges & Schools is requesting billions of federal dollars to teach y'allbonics in all classrooms North of the Mason-Dixon line. Included here are some samples of y'allbonics. If y 'all don't understand any of them,
contact your closest southern Hawg Roast Bubba for an explanation.

HIRE YEW - Complete sentence........ Remainder of a greeting.
Usage: "Howdy, Hire yew?"

BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."

BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum.
Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a coke."

IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart..... (See also "Arkansas native.")
Usage: "Them Bammer boys sure air ignert!"

RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tiet'nin' nuts & bolts.
Usage: "I thank I leff my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.
Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.
Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.
Usage: "I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.
Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, Ah sure hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.
Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle, or combat; to engage in battle or combat.
Usage: "You younguns have one mor fat n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh asses."

RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.
Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

CHEER - (adverb) In this place.
Usage: "Just set that jug rat cheer."

FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.
Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed.. must be from some farn country."

ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas; oxygen.
Usage: "He cain't breathe...give 'im some ARE!"

BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.
Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."

JEW HERE - (noun) & (verb) contraction.
Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

HAZE - a contraction.
Usage: "Is Bubba smart?"...... "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit n' is hole laf."

SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City."

VIEW - contraction (verb) & pronoun.
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"

Hehehe, not bad.

Haw dar yall say dem thing bout the grat sath. I dar say yall are unpatriotic. Arnd nat fit to live in thars here great nashion the Unerted States of America.

Thankyew very much, but ah live in the Grate Suthern Yew-nited States of Ameri-cuh, not to be cornfused with the rest of them Yew-nited States. Tow-tally diffrn't country altogethuh fo'sho.

Ok you two are butchering the American language. For that you have to listen to kenny G

Kenny G? Is that all? Whew! For a moment there I thought you were going to force me listen to Michael Bolton...

Its a duet with Micheal Jackson striping in the video From BS's personal collection

LOL, taking potshots at BS while he isn't around eh?

Go play with your banana son, you might get hurt.

Well someone has too....plus i only play with grapefruits