Please note that new user registrations disabled at this time.

Something or another wars episode V: The spam comes back

Anything goes... just keep it clean.
User avatar
TheAmazingOopah
Posts: 591
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:26 am
Location: The Lower Lands
Contact:

Post by TheAmazingOopah »

BlueSky wrote:To quote from a favorite movie of mine: :D

"...sometimes you eat the bear, and well dude...sometimes the bear eats you"
Uh uh, no, sir, not the bears that are living on my porch, no they don't. Those are trained vegetarian bears, I've been feeding those nothin' but tomatoes and gummi bears. Made them strong and reddish, just like small dragons, I tell ya. Fighting dragons, that is:mischief:
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
User avatar
TheAmazingOopah
Posts: 591
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:26 am
Location: The Lower Lands
Contact:

Post by TheAmazingOopah »

Magelord648 wrote:*Eats the bear.*
Clarice, no!!! :eek: :eek:

Grrrrr... Adrian, Jimbo, Laurel, Michelle, Tommy, Rudolph, Atticus, Pops, George, Stinker; Show that nasty, ol' magelord your claws. That'll teach him to stay off my property:mischief:
Goes to the backroom to take a nap
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
User avatar
Magelord648
Posts: 1668
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:54 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Post by Magelord648 »

Bears eating gummy bears. Cannibals!
[url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/the-elder-scrolls-iii-morrowind-29/tel-uvirith-86692.html"]Uvirith Awakes[/url] - Please leave comments, all help is appreciated.
User avatar
DesR85
Posts: 5440
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:42 pm
Location: Urban Warfare
Contact:

Post by DesR85 »

*Peers through binoculars* What's this? Bears moving in a coordinated pattern and behaving oddly? :eek: That's unusual. Better report this to HQ immediately. *Relays information to HQ*

Radio: Copy that. Maintain status quo for now. We don't know what they're up to. Over.

Over and out.
''They say truth is the first casualty of war. But who defines what's true? Truth is just a matter of perspective. The duty of every soldier is to protect the innocent, and sometimes that means preserving the lie of good and evil, that war isn't just natural selection played out on a grand scale. The only truth I found is that the world we live in is a giant tinderbox. All it takes...is someone to light the match" - Captain Price
User avatar
AmpaSand
Posts: 482
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 9:46 pm
Contact:

Post by AmpaSand »

well here's some i got the other day!!1


>THE SEVEN BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
>Chain Letter Type 1: (scroll down)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Make a wish!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Really, go on and make one!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Oh please.... they'll never go out with you!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Wish something else!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Not that, you moron!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Something else! Quick!!!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Is your finger getting tired yet?
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>STOP!!!!
>
>Wasn't that fun? Hope you made a great wish.
>
>
>Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you
don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be attacked by
a mad goat and then thrown off a high building into a pile of manure. It's
true!

Because, you know, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones, THIS one is
TRUE!!

Really!!! Here's how it goes:

Send this to 1 person:
One person will be mad at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
Send this to 2-5 people:
2-5 people will be mad at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
5-10 people:
5-10 people will be mad at you for sending them a stupidchain letter.
10-20 people:
10-20 people will be mad at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
20 to 674, 951 people:
20 to 674, 951 people will be mad at you for sending them a stupid chain
letter.
Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!

> Chain Letter Type 2
>
>Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving
little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms, no legs, no parents,
and no goats. This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time
you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless
Armless Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Remember, we have no
way of counting letters sent and this is all bull. So go on, reach out. Send
this to 5 people in the next 47seconds.

Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will
die instantly. Thanks again!!

Chain Letter Type 3

Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This is
absolutely incredible because there was no email then and probably not as many
little 8 year olds writing chain letters. So this is how it works. Pass this
on to 15,067 people in the next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to
you like:

Stupid Horror Story #1

Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently
received this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a crack in the
sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of
poopie, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty,
she died. This Could Happen To You!!!

Stupid Horror Story #2

Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored it.
Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his girlfriend. They both died.
Their families were so upset that everyone related to them (even by marriage)
went crazy and spent the rest of their miserable lives in an institution. This
Could Happen To You!!!

Remember, you could end up like Pinsley and Bip did. Just send this letter to
all of your loser friends, and everything will be OK.

Chain Letter Type 4:
As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every one of your
friends.

Friends

A friend is someone who is always at your side,
A friend is someone who likes you even though you smell like poop,
A friend is someone who likes you even though you're disgustingly ugly,
A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself,
A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your
loser life,
A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really
think you should be
attacked by a mad goat and then thrown in a pile of manure,
A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet and vacuums and then gets the check
and leaves and doesn't speak much English, no sorry - that's the cleaning
lady,
A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish
of
being rich to come true.

Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll be eaten by wild goats.

Chain Letter Type 5:
>This e-mail is wicked-cool! It was started by Microsoft to test its
>e-mail tracking system because, you know, a big high-tech company like
>Microsoft always sends important new software out over the internet to
>be available to any moron who can operate a computer, right? Plus, they
>have formed a secret merger with Disney Corp., who has agreed to give up
>millions of dollars in revenue by giving everyone who reads this e-mail,
>passes it on, looks at it, knows someone that looked at it, or is related
>to someone who is a friend of someone who looks at it A FREE,
>ALL-EXPENSES-PAID TRIP to Disneyland, DisneyWorld, or EuroDisney! So
>pass this on to everyone you know that is gullible enough to believe this
(or not)!
>Even if it's not true, hey insulting all of your friends by implying that
they are
>gullible by sending this to them is worth the improbable chance that you
could go
>to Disneyland! Even if you lose all of your friends because they are tired
>of receiving this kind of junk from you, it's worth the chance, right?
>And just for good measure, if you don't send this on, Microsoft will send
>its specially trained attack-goats to pilfer your house and eat all of your
family,
>SO SEND IT ON!!!!!


Chain Letter Type 6:

>VIRUS WARNING!!!
>If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes," delete it immediately.
>Do not open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only
>erase everything on your hard drive,but it will also delete anything on
>disks within 20 feet of your computer. It demagnetizes the stripes on
>ALL of your credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up
>the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch
>any CD's you attempt to play.
>It will re-calibrate your refrigerator's coolness settings so all your
>ice cream melts and your milk curdles.
>It will program your phone AutoDial to call only your mother-in-law's
number.
>So be careful! Forward this to all of your friends, relatives,
>neighbors, family, enemies, plumbers, garbagemen, stock brockers,
>doctors, and any other acquaintances!
> It's for their own good! Thank you.


Chain Letter Type 7:

Here is a cute picture I drew.

> (\ /)
> ( \ / )
> ( \ / )
> ( /<>\ )
> ( / \/ \ )
> / \ __
> ( ) ( )
>

It is a decapitated angel. Send it on to all of your friends so it will
brighten their day like it did yours! If you don't, demon-possessed goats
will move into your house and eat all of your socks, leading you to believe
that something is wrong with your washing machine because all of your socks
keep disappearing. Have a nice day!!!

There. Now that we've covered and dumped on the seven main types of chain
letters, onto the ironic part. In order for this to get any popularity, send
it on!!! If you don't think it was funny at all, don't bother, but otherwise
forward this sucker to everyone you know!! If you don't, I don't care, but why
not show this around? Take two minutes and forward it. Thanks!

Remember, the moral of the story is, if you get a chain letter, ignore it.
If it's a joke or something, send it, sure, but if it's gonna make people feel
guilty (i.e. the goatless boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen) or nervous (i.e.
Miranda Pinsley who ended up in a waterfall of turds) just delete it. Do
yourself a favor, and everyone else in the world, and say, DEATH TO CHAIN
LETTERS!!"
User avatar
Magelord648
Posts: 1668
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:54 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Post by Magelord648 »

Anyone home?
[url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/the-elder-scrolls-iii-morrowind-29/tel-uvirith-86692.html"]Uvirith Awakes[/url] - Please leave comments, all help is appreciated.
User avatar
TheAmazingOopah
Posts: 591
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:26 am
Location: The Lower Lands
Contact:

Post by TheAmazingOopah »

Magelord648 wrote:Anyone home?
(Hillbilly accent) Dang it, I told you to stay off my property!
Fires a round of bucksalt at the robed mage
(British accent) Now if you'll excuse me, I have a nap to attend to, once again. Cheerio!
Returns to his cabin
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
User avatar
Magelord648
Posts: 1668
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:54 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Post by Magelord648 »

That is a ghastly welcoming.
[url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/the-elder-scrolls-iii-morrowind-29/tel-uvirith-86692.html"]Uvirith Awakes[/url] - Please leave comments, all help is appreciated.
User avatar
kathycf
Posts: 529
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2006 7:07 pm
Location: Massachusetts, USA
Contact:

Post by kathycf »

So, what's up with all the evil goats/wild goats/eaten by wild evil goats in the chain letter (s)? Have I stumbled across an anti-goat movement on these boards? :eek:
his supply of the milk of human kindness is plainly short by several gallons
~P.G. Wodehouse
User avatar
Cartell
Posts: 149
Joined: Sat Aug 19, 2006 3:32 pm
Location: Currently in Mid-word, on the path of the Beam
Contact:

Post by Cartell »

O please no leave my goats alone you evil bastards!

*turns and cuddles a group of goats*
"Don't worry, daddy is here, no one hates you"
[QUOTE=Tricky;914030]I want the world to become more appreciative of carefully constructed spam. The art of saying absolutely nothing with many beautiful words is the closest you can get to poetry without meaning. That's life, really. Spagnificant.[/QUOTE]

The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.
User avatar
BlueSky
Posts: 1101
Joined: Sat May 06, 2006 6:10 pm
Location: middle of 10 acres of woods in Ky.
Contact:

Post by BlueSky »

Hmmm, let us see..:speech:

Is that a tribe of goats, :) or a flock of goats, :D or a giggle of goats?:laugh:
I do not intend to tiptoe through life only to arrive safely at death"-anon ;)
User avatar
Hill-Shatar
Posts: 7724
Joined: Sat Jun 18, 2005 1:41 am
Location: Hell Freezing Over
Contact:

Post by Hill-Shatar »

I assume it's bad when you forget what your username is for these sites.

Is it some sort of perverted SYM past time to go out, find a goat and make fun of it. Try sheep, more nostalgic for folks from '02. Those with the minds left to remember. :D

New forums, new news, new members, new smilies, is that pretty much all?
Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=68975"]HERE[/url]! Sabre's [url="http://www.users.bigpond.com/qtnt/index.htm"]site[/url] for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling.
User avatar
DesR85
Posts: 5440
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:42 pm
Location: Urban Warfare
Contact:

Post by DesR85 »

kathycf wrote:So, what's up with all the evil goats/wild goats/eaten by wild evil goats in the chain letter (s)? Have I stumbled across an anti-goat movement on these boards? :eek:
Looks like it. It's like in most of these chain letters, a goat is mentioned doing something bad. Ain't gonna look pretty for the animal rights activists.
''They say truth is the first casualty of war. But who defines what's true? Truth is just a matter of perspective. The duty of every soldier is to protect the innocent, and sometimes that means preserving the lie of good and evil, that war isn't just natural selection played out on a grand scale. The only truth I found is that the world we live in is a giant tinderbox. All it takes...is someone to light the match" - Captain Price
User avatar
TheAmazingOopah
Posts: 591
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 7:26 am
Location: The Lower Lands
Contact:

Post by TheAmazingOopah »

DesR85 wrote:Looks like it. It's like in most of these chain letters, a goat is mentioned doing something bad. Ain't gonna look pretty for the animal rights activists.
Isn't the Devil often depicted as goatish?:mischief:

By the way, I took care of your HQ, DesR85. I won't give away too much, but let's just say that you have one my bears is currently sitting behind one of your desks, perfectly adjusted to the team, with the suite and all - an infiltrant! HaHA!

Oh damn, now I gave it all away :( Well, he's well-trained, you'll never know who it is... :cool:
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
User avatar
Kipi
Posts: 4969
Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 6:57 am
Location: Finland
Contact:

Post by Kipi »

Hill-Shatar wrote: New forums, new news, new members, new smilies, is that pretty much all?
Yup...
The same old assylum... :D

@Des
Do we actually care what the activists think? :eek: :laugh:

Blame the goat! BLAME THE GOAT!! :D
"As we all know, holy men were born during Christmas...
Like mr. Holopainen over there!"
- Marco Hietala, the bass player of Nightwish
User avatar
DesR85
Posts: 5440
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:42 pm
Location: Urban Warfare
Contact:

Post by DesR85 »

TheAmazingOopah wrote: By the way, I took care of your HQ, DesR85. I won't give away too much, but let's just say that you have one my bears is currently sitting behind one of your desks, perfectly adjusted to the team, with the suite and all - an infiltrant! HaHA!
Interesting. Does he have any firearms training? :confused: Because, I don't want him to be a liability to the team. ;)
Kipi wrote: @Des
Do we actually care what the activists think? :eek: :lol:

Blame the goat! BLAME THE GOAT!! :D
I don't but these guys can be rather pesky at times. :( Might want to put a disclaimer here:

"No animals were harmed during this whole conversation."

So that nobody can sue us. :p
''They say truth is the first casualty of war. But who defines what's true? Truth is just a matter of perspective. The duty of every soldier is to protect the innocent, and sometimes that means preserving the lie of good and evil, that war isn't just natural selection played out on a grand scale. The only truth I found is that the world we live in is a giant tinderbox. All it takes...is someone to light the match" - Captain Price
User avatar
Kipi
Posts: 4969
Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 6:57 am
Location: Finland
Contact:

Post by Kipi »

DesR85 wrote: "No animals were harmed during this whole conversation."
Weren't?? :eek:
So that nobody can sue us. :p
They can always sue us, always... :D
"As we all know, holy men were born during Christmas...
Like mr. Holopainen over there!"
- Marco Hietala, the bass player of Nightwish
User avatar
Magelord648
Posts: 1668
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:54 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Post by Magelord648 »

*Eats the team at the Hq.*

We need to build a spam house to protect us from bears!
[url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/the-elder-scrolls-iii-morrowind-29/tel-uvirith-86692.html"]Uvirith Awakes[/url] - Please leave comments, all help is appreciated.
User avatar
DesR85
Posts: 5440
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:42 pm
Location: Urban Warfare
Contact:

Post by DesR85 »

Magelord648 wrote:*Eats the team at the Hq.*
You cannibal! Those were my men! :mad: Soldiers who fought alongside me from the time of the Airborne landings. I'll kill you for this! *Starts shooting at Magelord* :D
''They say truth is the first casualty of war. But who defines what's true? Truth is just a matter of perspective. The duty of every soldier is to protect the innocent, and sometimes that means preserving the lie of good and evil, that war isn't just natural selection played out on a grand scale. The only truth I found is that the world we live in is a giant tinderbox. All it takes...is someone to light the match" - Captain Price
User avatar
Magelord648
Posts: 1668
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:54 pm
Location: England
Contact:

Post by Magelord648 »

Don't worry. They'll come out again. My stomach acids only kill bears.
[url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/the-elder-scrolls-iii-morrowind-29/tel-uvirith-86692.html"]Uvirith Awakes[/url] - Please leave comments, all help is appreciated.
Post Reply