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...apparently the bottle-synchrophasotron was made in Taiwan too... Oh well, you have to fly to 666-Prime anyway. You adjust your controls with your voice which don't not break any more, btw (meaning both the controls and your voice), jump to hyperspace and open your favorite beer. Time to relax a bit. At that moment, you notice that you are out of beef jerky... You are not alone! SOMEONE or SOMETHING alien is hiding on your saucer...And it is HUNGRY!.. Realizing that your life is in terrible danger once again, you...

... begin to make a noose ...

... as after think it through, you realise the FUTURE jerkey has it's own legs (it's a jerkey cow) and it wandered off some where, like.....

...outer space. You see the Beef Jerky Monster flying next to the saucer. The Jerky Monster viciously attacks your starship with its teeth and hooves, then turns around and unleashes the deadly biological weapon of mass destruction (milk). But you are an expert in space combat. You...

....realise that it is harmless as it is now frozen solid and you proceed too....

... jump out the airlock. You leap off the saucer towards the frozen beef jerky monster, halfway there you realize you forgot to put on a space suit, but that doesn't matter now. As the air in your lungs begin to run out the only thought going through your head are: "Must...have...beef...jerky". You reach the beef jerky monster (Good thing you can hold your breath for 10 minutes ) and as soon as you touch it...

...your fingers get stuck to the deadly frozen beef! You start feeling kinda cold and lonely. What to do? The only solution is to drag the monster inside your ship. You try to squeeze through the narrow airlock door but the beef jerky monster is too big. You have to get rid of it. You are almost out of breath... At the last .00001 second you tug at the monster with all your might disconnecting yourself from it and get inside... What a relief! But wait! WHERE ARE YOUR FINGERS????...

... they are in the cookie jar! ... no seriously (no intention of ruining this piece of patchwork poetry, no sir!) ... well, they are inside your gloves! Wow, you really scared yourself there! "What?" you say to yourself. "I didn't say anything," you respond, realizing it is probably time for your medication ...

...still a bit dizzy from the lack oxygen, caused by holding your breath for 10 minutes, you dive through the huge pile of pill bottles, various potions, and assorted strange plants. After looking for a while you find this bottle with a liquid that seems to change colours. "This has to be it" you say to yourself, you read the instructions: "d. ..t consume whole bottle." "Some of the label seems to be missing... Can't be that important" you think to yourself as you unscrew the top "Bottoms up!"...

...you guzzle the whole bottle and snack on the strange plants and pills. You feel real good now. You also feel a need to share your joy with a friend. You think about the jerky monster. Poor chump (you think) is still out there, all by itself, without a friend. You walk to your laser gun and start shooting at the frozen beef to cheer it up. Suddenly...

....Turns into a bowl of petunias (bonus point if you know the refrence) and you seem to have lifted off the floor....

...you are floating in a haze of happy mistiness. Floating high above the deck of the cabin. Through the mist you see a figure... no it's a group...this cannot be, you never get this lucky!. But yes, it's our sponsors, crikey, it's Laura and the other FoxyFans...

... and you realize the hallucinations have begun to kick in bad ...

...so it is time to take another swig. Not looking at the labels any more, you drink all potions you could find in the medicine cabinet, including your favorite aftershave. It helps to relax...

... but only until the snakes start crawling out from under you shirt ...

.....So you go off to have a shave. On returning you seem to have landed on....

... the lap of Taylor, the Nerd. Do you think she's nerdy? In fact, you don't really see that connection at all, so naturally the hallucinations are worse than ever ...

... but a solid hallucination? Taylor seems very real. She smiles at you with gleaming white teeth. You are about to smile back; may as well get into the spirit of this hallucination...when you notice her lovely smile is marred by two sharp pointy fangs...

Sharp pointy fangs...could it be the infamous...Killer Rabbit

... yes it could, but is it? ...