GameBanshee Forums

wish granted. you get the only computer with a 4 terabyte memory. unfortunately, it belongs to the government. you still want it, so you steal it. they catch you and you rot in jail.

i wish i wasnt such a nerd.

double post

wing wrote:i wish i wasnt such a nerd.

Granted. The Angel of Love, Popularity, and Ultra-Coolness descends from the heavens and blesses you with her radiance.
All of a sudden.. you are the hottest thing ever. People travel thousands of miles to bathe in your reflected coolness. Indeed, you are so popular that men and women everywhere pine and lust after you.

The only problem is that you become thoroughly exhausted from all of the adoring attention, you have no time to eat, sleep or pay attention to basic necessities. Eventually you collapse and fall into a deep coma, and the doctors view the chances of your regaining consciousness as infinitely slim.

I wish we could snap our fingers and all dirty dishes would be instantly clean and stored in their respective cupboards

Granted.
Everytime you break one of your fingers, the dishes get done. Shall I pass you a hammer?

~

I wish people would show more courtesy and respect to one another.

granted, instead they disrespect someone twice as bad to a different person and get it passed on, so no problems solved...

i wish beer was like...10% instead of 5...

Granted. Your beeris made 10% without your knowledge, and you colaspe in the street and die of achol poisining, because you cant get to de-tox on time.

I wish I could control time.

Your wish is granted. You do indeed have the ability to control time, however, upon using it, you learn you can only do so once and due to a miscalculation, you are now reliving the single most embarrassing moment of your life over and over with no way out.

I wish I could spell.

Granted.

Not only do you learn to spell you become more aware of other people's spelling mistakes. Eventually, finding so many on the internet and more specifically on certain forums, you go on a wild gunslinging rampage in sheer frustration over these errors resulting in Buck removing your moderator status.

I wish I didn't have to do exams in school.

Granted. Exams are now abolished from schools. As a result of this, universities are unsure about your academic performance and are not willing to accept you as a result of this.

I wish I have night-vision goggles.

Granted. you now have a set of two dollar night vision goggles. nice and cheap and ready to blow up. they blow up and blind you. you are forced to wear stupid-looking sunglasses for the rest of your life, but you will never know what everyone is laughing at.

i wish people would actually take me seriously once in a while.

granted, everyone takes you seriously and then all of a sudden youre like man i feel like dying right now, and then everyone who didnt like you pulled out a gun and massacred your body...(that isnt morbid...is it?? )

i wish for eternal life without aging beyond 25 years old

granted. you find the fountain of youth, keeping you forever young. for a while, it's awesome. but then people realize it. and they start asking you where it is. when you won't tell them, they keep bothering you about it. the bothering gets worse and worse until it drives you insane, and you are forced to live out eternity as a 25-year-old in an insanasylum.

i wish i controlled reality.

Granted. You now control reality. However, the power now at your disposal soon starts to eat at your sanity. This continues for weeks until you end up leaving your home and living at the back of the bins behind Tesco's - dancing for food. Unfortunately - since you still control reality - EVERYBODY is living behind the bins at the back of Tesco's dancing for food. You die of starvation shortly after your wish being granted.

I wish I could turn people into pickles.

Granted. As I write this I have begun to turn green, and have sprouted warts all over my body. I hate you.

I wish the Cowboys would win the Super Bowl this year.

granted, the cowboys with the super bowl but all the cheerleaders turned ugly all of a sudden and no one went to their games

i wish no one could ever be mad at me unless i wanted them too(someones mad at me but just says "you know what you did" lol umm no i dont actually...)

You have been erased from existance, no longer will anyone feel any resentment towards you.

~

I wish find a job I enjoy and get paid well for.

Granted. However renting out ones body is usually frowned upon in polite society for good reason. You contract multiple STD's. Death soon follows.

I wish that this wish would not be granted.

Granted. It just so happens that at the moment you said that , a person with the power to grant you anything was listening, hoping to grant you a good wish.

I wish I had a better laptop.

Granted

Your laptop now has a stainless steel case, upgrading it's visual appeal. Too bad it's so heavy now.

~

I wish for my countries world debt be eliminated.

It's eliminated, but only in exchange for your countries sovereignty. You now have an economically free, yet politically oppressed country.

I wish that it would snow. Now.