Bloodstalker moved much easier now that he had his own authentic map in his hands.He felt as if all was about to come together. Soon, he would have his desire, and much celbration would ensue. So it was with a joyful heart that BS started up the next tunnel.
Poking his head through the floor, he new immediately that something was, yet again, very wrong. A foul smell assaulted his senses, one he recognized immediately. The smell of tea. Dissappointment fell on him as he looked around the room.There in the corner was a bookshelf, littered with titles such as "Guidebook for The Macho Man in the New Century" and "1001 tips for the Male Chovenist" Strangely, these titles had the look of never being read. BS got his answer when he spied the book on the stand next to the computer, "How to Pick up Women by Acting Like a Male Pig".
Looking around the room, he made out posters of the various ladies of SYM. Ah, yes, there in fact was a poster of his own object of affection. He had no time to contemplate further before a figure strode into the room. The man wore a flowing cape, a black beret with a feather scotch taped to it, and what was that? gold pantaloons? He watches as the man paused before each poster, spouting poetry and bursting occasionally into song, before moving to sit before his computer. CM, for BS knew indeed that this was CM, sat staring at the screen, fingers clasped before him as he read the latest posts in SYM. a smile grew on his face as he saw that his lastest colley of DF bashing had indeed garnered him hug after hug. He jumped to his feet, hands clapping wildly, and did what was evidently the happy happy joy joy dance.
Coming to a stop before one of the posters, he began to address it. He went on and on about how since blue was a pleasing color to the female eye, (evidently the how to book was quite clear on this) he was going to turn the entire world map blue and present it to her, that she might lavish him with affection. He would win out in the Diplomacy game, and thus secure his place as lead male pig. Surely then all the women of SYM would adore him.
BS was totally disgusted. This plan the man held, this outrageous ruse he had concocted......How did BS himself not think of this first? His musings were interupted as a lady entered the room.
CM stopped immediately changed his tone, began berating all the DF's. The woman was not buying any of it, and her smile seemed to anger CM. He pulled out an uzi, aimed it at the woman , and fired. BS would have been horrified had it not turned out that the uzi was in fact a squirt gun, and CM was only spraying the women with a stream of tea. It was not lost on BS that the tea was directed in such a way as to only wet the young ladies t shirt. She moved to take the uzi, and brought forth a needle. Ah, yes, BS had had much experience with nurses, and knew what was coming. the nurse gave CM a hug, meaning to give the injection unawares, but CM had other ideas. While he smiled over the nurses shoulder at the hug, his arm blocked the needle, and he turned and sprung out the window, landing in the middle of the street. Scearming wildly about the DF's and their evil plans, he ran down the center of the street, appearing for all the world like some mad prophet. It was amazing how the man could slip in and out of character so easily.
Sighing with disappointment, BS lowered himself back into the tunnell. So, the map was wrong. Or maybe he just wasn't reading it right. In disgust, he threw the map to the ground, opting instead to activate his last hope, his ace in the hole.
He pulled out the ACME femininity seeker and activated it. When all else failed, he would rely on technology to be his guide. He whistled as he followed the beeps the device was emitting. There would be no stopping him now............
