In Search of the Holy Spam
Sir Magrus drops his mug while turning to stare at Sir Chu. He mutters under his breath "This was not agreed upon! I must secure my home." before sneaking out the back of the inn.
"You can do whatever you want to me."
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"
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dragon wench
- Posts: 19609
- Joined: Tue Apr 24, 2001 10:00 pm
- Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
- Contact:
Noticing Fiona's appraisal of her mount, DW grinned. While admiring her companion's beautiful horse she explained.
"I fell in love with the damned animal several years ago. I didn't actually consider the fact that Arab stallions are notoriously difficult to handle."
She rolled her eyes in self-mockery, but then smiled again. "He is a fine horse though...very loyal.. and on many occasions he has helped me to fight."
Icarus, easily riding along on his scythe, heard the last part of her sentence. "You have experience fighting?"
It was actually more of a statement than a question. DW nodded in response, though she offered no further comment.
DW's thoughts drifted to the contents of her saddle bags, and she wondered if she had packed the right items in her haste to depart. Various spell components were tucked securely into several small sacks, along with two wine skins, bread and some hard cheese. The second saddle bag contained a change of clothing, some warm robes, healing potions and numerous mysterious, magical items.
Lost a little in thought, it took a moment for her to register the excited conversation of Icarus and Fiona.
They were motioning animatedly to a sign that pointed in a southwesterly direction. Upon it, were written the words "Church of Guinness, one day's journey from here."
At that very moment, a leprechaun materialized on top of the sign and began to dance a spirited Irish jig.
"I fell in love with the damned animal several years ago. I didn't actually consider the fact that Arab stallions are notoriously difficult to handle."
She rolled her eyes in self-mockery, but then smiled again. "He is a fine horse though...very loyal.. and on many occasions he has helped me to fight."
Icarus, easily riding along on his scythe, heard the last part of her sentence. "You have experience fighting?"
It was actually more of a statement than a question. DW nodded in response, though she offered no further comment.
DW's thoughts drifted to the contents of her saddle bags, and she wondered if she had packed the right items in her haste to depart. Various spell components were tucked securely into several small sacks, along with two wine skins, bread and some hard cheese. The second saddle bag contained a change of clothing, some warm robes, healing potions and numerous mysterious, magical items.
Lost a little in thought, it took a moment for her to register the excited conversation of Icarus and Fiona.
They were motioning animatedly to a sign that pointed in a southwesterly direction. Upon it, were written the words "Church of Guinness, one day's journey from here."
At that very moment, a leprechaun materialized on top of the sign and began to dance a spirited Irish jig.
Spoiler
testingtest12
Spoiler
testingtest12
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ch85us2001
- Posts: 8748
- Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2005 7:53 pm
- Location: My mind dwells elsewhere . . .
Chu hefted his equipment into the canoe he and Tony were sharing. He wasnt going to have to share, until recent events came about.
Blast Magrus, he had left without them, and stolen a canoe. "His Vodka bottle of woe and potato Launcher of doom would have been handy to have." Chu muttered to himself. They could only assume that he had gone ahead to protect his liquor stocks from the invaders.
Tony walked up, his back straining from the load of his pack. "Help me with this!" He shouted.
Chu lifted the pack off his back. "Jeesh man, whad'dya have in this thing!!!!!!!"
"I packed alot of water." Tony mumbled.
"We're going to be on a river you idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I guess I didnt think of that." Tony mutterred dejectedly.
"Well, to late now, hop in!!! I think we are ready to go!!!!!!!!!!"
They pushed off silently, heading for the MCOPCDAWD . . .
Blast Magrus, he had left without them, and stolen a canoe. "His Vodka bottle of woe and potato Launcher of doom would have been handy to have." Chu muttered to himself. They could only assume that he had gone ahead to protect his liquor stocks from the invaders.
Tony walked up, his back straining from the load of his pack. "Help me with this!" He shouted.
Chu lifted the pack off his back. "Jeesh man, whad'dya have in this thing!!!!!!!"
"I packed alot of water." Tony mumbled.
"We're going to be on a river you idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I guess I didnt think of that." Tony mutterred dejectedly.
"Well, to late now, hop in!!! I think we are ready to go!!!!!!!!!!"
They pushed off silently, heading for the MCOPCDAWD . . .
[url=tamriel-rebuilt.org]Tamriel Rebuilt and,[/url] [url="http://z13.invisionfree.com/Chus_Mod_Forum/index.php?"]My Mod Fansite[/url]
I am the Lord of Programming, and your Mother Board, and your RAR Unpacker, and Your Runtime Engine, can tell you all about it
I am the Lord of Programming, and your Mother Board, and your RAR Unpacker, and Your Runtime Engine, can tell you all about it
While his companions were amused by the leprechaun, Icarus quickly grabbed a bag from one of the folds of his robe and put the mythical dwarf in it.
"We can either trade it or have it with us for good luck." He explained.
The leprechaun kept dancing. "Hey, little man, you should really stop dancing and start struggling! It's what all caught creatures in a bag do."
Still, he kept dancing.
"I'm not kidding around, little man! Stop it this instance!" He looked at Fiona and Dragonwench. "He won't stop?"
"I can't!" said a small, muzzled high-pitched voice from inside the bag.
"We can either trade it or have it with us for good luck." He explained.
The leprechaun kept dancing. "Hey, little man, you should really stop dancing and start struggling! It's what all caught creatures in a bag do."
Still, he kept dancing.
"I'm not kidding around, little man! Stop it this instance!" He looked at Fiona and Dragonwench. "He won't stop?"
"I can't!" said a small, muzzled high-pitched voice from inside the bag.
[size=-1]An optimist is a badly informed pessimist.[/size]
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Hill-Shatar
- Posts: 7724
- Joined: Sat Jun 18, 2005 1:41 am
- Location: Hell Freezing Over
- Contact:
Hill stood seething in front of a burned desk with a slightly flustered look who was now shoving papers into his hand. Burned, because Hill had cursed in impatience at the process of getting onto the stupid caravan and had momentarily forgotten his profession. The desk had burst into flames as a result.
Sitting down with a huff in one of the finely carved oaken chairs, he began to write out his personal (and some of it was asking some very strange questions) information. Looking up, he saw with interest a man with a sythe as a mount fighting with, it appeared, his chest, which he grasped quite often as it bobbled around.
A little stunned by this, he looked down at his half finished paper. It asked if he had an diabilities. He thought about this, and answered 'No more than the others currently running around the town'.
Moving back up to hand his papers in, he saw a group of people chanting 'Sataaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.... SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATAN!' and bowing before some unidentifiable religious object. Apparently the only sane one in the town, he made his way out the door while they signed him for the caravan leaving in the next few hours for a quick visit to the nearby shop. His pack had always been remarkably light, and he wanted to add a little weight to it.
Sitting down with a huff in one of the finely carved oaken chairs, he began to write out his personal (and some of it was asking some very strange questions) information. Looking up, he saw with interest a man with a sythe as a mount fighting with, it appeared, his chest, which he grasped quite often as it bobbled around.
A little stunned by this, he looked down at his half finished paper. It asked if he had an diabilities. He thought about this, and answered 'No more than the others currently running around the town'.
Moving back up to hand his papers in, he saw a group of people chanting 'Sataaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.... SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATAN!' and bowing before some unidentifiable religious object. Apparently the only sane one in the town, he made his way out the door while they signed him for the caravan leaving in the next few hours for a quick visit to the nearby shop. His pack had always been remarkably light, and he wanted to add a little weight to it.
Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=68975"]HERE[/url]! Sabre's [url="http://www.users.bigpond.com/qtnt/index.htm"]site[/url] for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling.
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Fiona
Fiona sighed. She watched Ik trying to control the dancing bag clutched close inside his shirt
“Hey, you can’t just kidnap people because they’re smaller than you. Put the leprechaun down” She watched as Ik opened the bag and the mythical being danced out. Since it was dancing an Irish Jig it could not raise its arms. She suspected this was lucky for Ik because it didn’t seem to be very pleased. At present it could neither punch him nor hex him, however.
The leprechaun made no attempt to dance away from the party. In fact it began to speak in a clearer voice now it was free of the bag. “Let me introduce myself. My name is Oran Mor. Forgive me if I do not shake hands, nor yet tip my hat. I am unable to do so just at the moment. Spell, you see.” The leprechaun blushed to the roots of its hair. “If you could help me, I could be very generous in return”
Fiona stared hard at Oran Mor. “Well met, sir. You will likewise no doubt forgive me if I withhold our names. I would like to know more about you before giving you the means to wield great power over us, should you prove to be more or less than you seem. If there is a way to help you then tell us your need”
The leprechaun was in no position to take the strunts. “Curiously, I could stop dancing long enough to tell my tale if someone would play a tune. I only have to dance when there is no music” Again Oran Mor reddened.
Fiona considered this and then took out her fiddle. She played, and gradually Oran Mor stilled. While the others talked to the leprachaun she held herself ready to stop playing at the first false move
“Hey, you can’t just kidnap people because they’re smaller than you. Put the leprechaun down” She watched as Ik opened the bag and the mythical being danced out. Since it was dancing an Irish Jig it could not raise its arms. She suspected this was lucky for Ik because it didn’t seem to be very pleased. At present it could neither punch him nor hex him, however.
The leprechaun made no attempt to dance away from the party. In fact it began to speak in a clearer voice now it was free of the bag. “Let me introduce myself. My name is Oran Mor. Forgive me if I do not shake hands, nor yet tip my hat. I am unable to do so just at the moment. Spell, you see.” The leprechaun blushed to the roots of its hair. “If you could help me, I could be very generous in return”
Fiona stared hard at Oran Mor. “Well met, sir. You will likewise no doubt forgive me if I withhold our names. I would like to know more about you before giving you the means to wield great power over us, should you prove to be more or less than you seem. If there is a way to help you then tell us your need”
The leprechaun was in no position to take the strunts. “Curiously, I could stop dancing long enough to tell my tale if someone would play a tune. I only have to dance when there is no music” Again Oran Mor reddened.
Fiona considered this and then took out her fiddle. She played, and gradually Oran Mor stilled. While the others talked to the leprachaun she held herself ready to stop playing at the first false move
[QUOTE=dj_venom]"If it isn't Ravager himself. I took a visit to your house, and I found something very interesting." As Venom said that, Ravager went pale. "That's right, I found that you had an album from the Spice Girls. I'm shocked at you Ravager! Oh, and that book about bird taming, Phreddie ate it. Now, we need a goat, as said by the Raven itself. For that, I have an idea.
You see, unknown to most, Phreddies are asexual. Just like a starfish. Which means, if I cut off a piece of him, it will turn into a new Phreddie. In this way, we can travel vast distances. But before I do that, I'm going to need a cleric to help stop the blood flow, any suggestions about where I could find one?"[/QUOTE]
"You broke into my house?! How does everyone seem to know where I live all of a sudden?! As for the album..well..uh..that's not mine! Someone must have left it there! Yeah, that must have been it."
He mentioned a goat. A goat? That must have been yet another of the rumours spread by the malicious raven. Who knew how many of those had any truth in whatsoever. It certainly wasn't one invented by him to be spread by Lenore. His poor home. Who knew what these...bumbling buffoons... had done and seen in there?!
"Okay, sure...Yeah, I buy that," Ravager tried unsuccesfully to keep the laughter out of his voice. "What next? A fire-breathing goldfish?"
Now this about the goat? Sure, it talked, flew and sniffed Febreeze like an addict...but what?!
And turning to the newcomer who had so rudely interrupted "And you, you're even worse to be playing to these...fantasies! Oh, excellent timing on your part if I do say so myself...
You make a habit of this kind of thing? Wait...I recognise you...Lasher?! Shouldn't you be gone or something? Why are you even here?"
You see, unknown to most, Phreddies are asexual. Just like a starfish. Which means, if I cut off a piece of him, it will turn into a new Phreddie. In this way, we can travel vast distances. But before I do that, I'm going to need a cleric to help stop the blood flow, any suggestions about where I could find one?"[/QUOTE]
"You broke into my house?! How does everyone seem to know where I live all of a sudden?! As for the album..well..uh..that's not mine! Someone must have left it there! Yeah, that must have been it."
He mentioned a goat. A goat? That must have been yet another of the rumours spread by the malicious raven. Who knew how many of those had any truth in whatsoever. It certainly wasn't one invented by him to be spread by Lenore. His poor home. Who knew what these...bumbling buffoons... had done and seen in there?!
"Okay, sure...Yeah, I buy that," Ravager tried unsuccesfully to keep the laughter out of his voice. "What next? A fire-breathing goldfish?"
Now this about the goat? Sure, it talked, flew and sniffed Febreeze like an addict...but what?!
And turning to the newcomer who had so rudely interrupted "And you, you're even worse to be playing to these...fantasies! Oh, excellent timing on your part if I do say so myself...
You make a habit of this kind of thing? Wait...I recognise you...Lasher?! Shouldn't you be gone or something? Why are you even here?"
A Cold Breeze
Athena reached a spot where the river began to curve east. She decided she would have to head west and had to take some containers full of water along. She corked a bottle remembering that in an attempt to spring someone from prison she had gotten caught up in the underground trading between the Harems of the the Dark Flame and the Temple of temptresses. Apparantly there was a price on her head. As a guest, she was invited to the east into the Dark Flame tent. Festivities progressed into early morning hours before the party was mysteriously sabotaged.
She had no travel group, no money and her powers had been hexed. Fumbling around in her cloaks pockets she felt
a roll of duct tape,
some bailing twine,
a blue tarp?
a dissection kit,
a pound of granola,
a load of sweetleaf,
some jerkey,
some ginger,
about a dozen silver poison tipped throwing stars,
various magical trinkets,
gemstones,
pepper spray,
a hunting knife,
some magical elixirs,
a harmonica and
a long attractive silk scarf which in fact was not a scarf at all
Athena felt a cold breeze come from behind her. Her eyes glowed red. She spun around and from across the river, a strange goblin like creature lept. She counterstruck grabbing its throat and throwing it against a large rock. She then chucked a poison star into its jugular and it was over. Or was it? As she collected the star she heard sreeches and three more goblins came crashing across the river. One jumped at her head. She ducked and rolled, avoiding the first and knifing the second, but the third attacked her collar digging into her flesh with daggerlike teeth. She grabbed it and shook trying to pull it away but it dug and scratched at her cloak shredding several layers she could feel the stinging and aching. The other two attacked her legs and back. Athena spun around kicking and grabbing at the goblins as a bronco would try to dismount its rider. To no avail.
In the midst of this attack there was a mysterious blue glow across the river. There was a flash in the wink of an eye it disappeared into the dawn light as fast as it was noticed. Athena's hands emitted a strange red energy and she grabbed the creature on her collar burning its neck with her firey hands.The creature dropped screeching then hissed. Athena backed against a tree to squish that goblin on her back and ripped her nails into the one on her leg, burning its flesh. The three goblins tried to retaliate but Athena was really smoking now. Cursed sparks drifted out from under her arms like wings and shot forth, shocking the goblins into attention "Off with you!" She commanded in an obsure language. The goblins in a state of confusion hissed more. Athena's eyes got big and she shocked them again, this time sparking her own body a little. "Off with you!" The goblins scurried back across the river into the dawn light as quickly as they had appeared. "Damned hexes." She rubbed her warm palms together and turned west. But not before wondering if someone or something had been following her. She started to run.
Athena reached a spot where the river began to curve east. She decided she would have to head west and had to take some containers full of water along. She corked a bottle remembering that in an attempt to spring someone from prison she had gotten caught up in the underground trading between the Harems of the the Dark Flame and the Temple of temptresses. Apparantly there was a price on her head. As a guest, she was invited to the east into the Dark Flame tent. Festivities progressed into early morning hours before the party was mysteriously sabotaged.
She had no travel group, no money and her powers had been hexed. Fumbling around in her cloaks pockets she felt
a roll of duct tape,
some bailing twine,
a blue tarp?
a dissection kit,
a pound of granola,
a load of sweetleaf,
some jerkey,
some ginger,
about a dozen silver poison tipped throwing stars,
various magical trinkets,
gemstones,
pepper spray,
a hunting knife,
some magical elixirs,
a harmonica and
a long attractive silk scarf which in fact was not a scarf at all
Athena felt a cold breeze come from behind her. Her eyes glowed red. She spun around and from across the river, a strange goblin like creature lept. She counterstruck grabbing its throat and throwing it against a large rock. She then chucked a poison star into its jugular and it was over. Or was it? As she collected the star she heard sreeches and three more goblins came crashing across the river. One jumped at her head. She ducked and rolled, avoiding the first and knifing the second, but the third attacked her collar digging into her flesh with daggerlike teeth. She grabbed it and shook trying to pull it away but it dug and scratched at her cloak shredding several layers she could feel the stinging and aching. The other two attacked her legs and back. Athena spun around kicking and grabbing at the goblins as a bronco would try to dismount its rider. To no avail.
In the midst of this attack there was a mysterious blue glow across the river. There was a flash in the wink of an eye it disappeared into the dawn light as fast as it was noticed. Athena's hands emitted a strange red energy and she grabbed the creature on her collar burning its neck with her firey hands.The creature dropped screeching then hissed. Athena backed against a tree to squish that goblin on her back and ripped her nails into the one on her leg, burning its flesh. The three goblins tried to retaliate but Athena was really smoking now. Cursed sparks drifted out from under her arms like wings and shot forth, shocking the goblins into attention "Off with you!" She commanded in an obsure language. The goblins in a state of confusion hissed more. Athena's eyes got big and she shocked them again, this time sparking her own body a little. "Off with you!" The goblins scurried back across the river into the dawn light as quickly as they had appeared. "Damned hexes." She rubbed her warm palms together and turned west. But not before wondering if someone or something had been following her. She started to run.
peace love and music wasn't made with a fist yall!
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query ... reation%22
http://sprott.physics.wisc.edu/Pickover/pc/dmt.html
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query ... reation%22
http://sprott.physics.wisc.edu/Pickover/pc/dmt.html
Striding off into the distance, Sir Magrus quickly found himself amidst a large group of trees. Muttering a few words and waving his hands around, he turns into a large eagle and flies off above the trees. Soon, he covers the distance to his abode and lands lightly upon the front steps as he regains his natural shape. "We'll see how those people like my home when they show up!" he cackles as he quickly presses a number of bricks along the front wall to the large manor. The door opens, and he murmers a word then dissapears inside, the door sliding shut behind him.
"You can do whatever you want to me."
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"
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dj_venom
- Posts: 4416
- Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2004 7:00 am
- Location: The biggest island in the world
- Contact:
"Don't you come the raw prawn with me Rav, you know how many of these gozwhoppers I've met, that's right, 1, this one. So a bit of respect is due. Now, where is it..." rummaging through his pockets, Venom pulled out several things, including a boomerang, a salt water crocodile and a book on ballet dancing, growing red, "that wasn't supposed to be there. Ah! Here it is." Suddenly he pulled out a bridle and threw it around Phreddie. "Giddyup!" Venom yelled, as he leapt onto his spool.
"Lead on my noble steed, we shall accomplish great things in my name!"
"Lead on my noble steed, we shall accomplish great things in my name!"
In memorian: Fiona; Ravager; Lestat; Phreddie; and all of those from the 1500 incident. Lest we forget.
Funny Feeling
It was light out now, near the middle of the day. Athena was on her way across the plain when she felt the heat hit her. She slowed her pace and decided to stop to tend to her wounds, rehydrate, eat, smoke some sweetleaf, and oh yeah, rest. Something about this heat was un-natural. Trying to be as docile and unthreatening as she could, looking at no particular thing (at the ground, actually), she murmered, "Why are you following me?" There was no answer but she could feel something there, in the warmth. She purged on.
Some hours later, she heard rambling coming toward her from behind. Spinning around, she saw a sight to behold. It seemed that she was traveling on the road of a glorious and grand stagecoach! She flagged down it's driver; a shaggy tough looking dwarf. "Woah!" He commanded his team of four chestnut horses, tugging the reigns each one stopped in simultaneous step. Athena smiled in approach. "Kind dwarf, I am Athena, I am hurt and I need to get to the Wild Wild SYM Ranch as soon as possible." "I am Galuf" he said gruffly, "state your business."
"I am an equine professional," Athena quickly answered, "and when we arrive at the Ranch, you might give your horses rest, as I can tell, they have been worked hard. I have little else to offer except sound advice, my friend. Where have you driven this team from, and where are you going?"
the Dwarf answered in a gruff voice, "This coach runs from Ceridwen Castle to the rent a boat docks at Lake Leda. Seeing as you are in the middle of nowhere and want to be on the doorstep of elswhryr, take a seat here and well be thurr before you delay me further." He smirked. Athena jumped in the shotgun seat.
It was light out now, near the middle of the day. Athena was on her way across the plain when she felt the heat hit her. She slowed her pace and decided to stop to tend to her wounds, rehydrate, eat, smoke some sweetleaf, and oh yeah, rest. Something about this heat was un-natural. Trying to be as docile and unthreatening as she could, looking at no particular thing (at the ground, actually), she murmered, "Why are you following me?" There was no answer but she could feel something there, in the warmth. She purged on.
Some hours later, she heard rambling coming toward her from behind. Spinning around, she saw a sight to behold. It seemed that she was traveling on the road of a glorious and grand stagecoach! She flagged down it's driver; a shaggy tough looking dwarf. "Woah!" He commanded his team of four chestnut horses, tugging the reigns each one stopped in simultaneous step. Athena smiled in approach. "Kind dwarf, I am Athena, I am hurt and I need to get to the Wild Wild SYM Ranch as soon as possible." "I am Galuf" he said gruffly, "state your business."
"I am an equine professional," Athena quickly answered, "and when we arrive at the Ranch, you might give your horses rest, as I can tell, they have been worked hard. I have little else to offer except sound advice, my friend. Where have you driven this team from, and where are you going?"
the Dwarf answered in a gruff voice, "This coach runs from Ceridwen Castle to the rent a boat docks at Lake Leda. Seeing as you are in the middle of nowhere and want to be on the doorstep of elswhryr, take a seat here and well be thurr before you delay me further." He smirked. Athena jumped in the shotgun seat.
peace love and music wasn't made with a fist yall!
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query ... reation%22
http://sprott.physics.wisc.edu/Pickover/pc/dmt.html
http://www.archive.org/search.php?query ... reation%22
http://sprott.physics.wisc.edu/Pickover/pc/dmt.html
Phreddie chomps through the harness that DJ so carelessly throw atop this Noble 'steed', taking the sperated ends of the harness he attached it to the baggage carpet, next he tied the baggage carpet to the pasenger carpet, and then secured DJ Venom to his spool. "The ride can get very rough, and we dont want our favorite... well we dont want you falling off the train yet. After securing the rest of the baggage, Phreddie sat around waiting for the others, during the wait two things happened, first Phreddie transformed back into the form of a Goat, and felt the need to relieve himself, which he did, on an album labeled 'Backstreet Boys' located in the bag of the Magical Venom himself. The second thing that had happened, was that Phreddie had noticed a Raven circling a group of travelers to the east, a flash of light and the Raven fl to the ground about 2 meters to the right of the path. "Hmm that raven seemed big enough to feed us for a night and a day, have to remember to look for its carcass when we get out that far, must also remember to give that traveling gourp of Mages a wide berth, and possible a lot of god/ Mr. Venom." Phreddie said to himself.
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Phreddie]Grabbing his bottle of febreeze from his shoulder holster, Phreddie quickly transformed back into the form of a Human. "Dear Sirs, It would benefit you greatly to keep your hands and blades off of me, for if I do come to any harm at your hands, I will be forced to destroy your ability to procreate if you catch my drift! Oh, and by the way, I am most definitly not asexual, that is the Holy Spam Goat, who if the rumors amonst the goat herds are true, has been recently split into seven seperate entities (each representing a certain aspect of the Goat of Spam), and must be reassembled for the Holy Spam ever to be truly... what ever it is we are trying to do to the spam. Oh and I do know the locations of all seven Goats, The first Goat is rumored to be lurking around Epona's Ranch, So.. Westward Ho!... for now."[/QUOTE]
Great, now the Febreeze sniffing weregoat had to get in on the act...as if it wasn't bad enough in it's goat form...though Ravager supposed that he wouldn't be chewing up more precious belongings in human form, at least there was that to be grateful for.
In any case, none of this took him much by surprise, the unexpected was to be expected round here, right?
Perhaps this Holy Goat truly did exist if it was...uh....talked about among the goat herds. Hmmph.
Maybe this Goat would be useful to his plans. He'd tag along...for now at least. He just wondered how long he'd be able to stand the attitude of this creature.
[QUOTE=Phreddie] At this Phreddie stand sup takes a hit of febreeze, and walks outside, twenty mintues later he reenters the room, carrying three carpets and a giant wooden spool of thread, minus the thread. "here we go, I 'borrowed' these from a bum a couple of blocks away, our need is greater than his." Seeing the confused looks, Phreddie explains: " They are magic flying carpets, one for transportation, one for baggage, and the spool is for Mr. Venom, there is not enough room on the carpets for you, so you get towed behind in your spool, it will levitate, but can not move in a direction with out being pushed or pulled, I myself will fly, acting as a scout at times, but mostly I believe I shall lead this expedition, that is, i will lead if I hear no objections?..." [/QUOTE]
Ravager stood up, "Are you out of your mind?! You seriously expect me...us to ride...a...a spool?! Huh. Why should I even get involved in this?!
Flying carpets, flying goats, flying spools...is there anything normal or vaguely natural around here?!"
[QUOTE=DJV]"Don't you come the raw prawn with me Rav, you know how many of these gozwhoppers I've met, that's right, 1, this one. So a bit of respect is due. Now, where is it..."[/QUOTE]
Ravager shook his head, unable to comprehend in the slighest whatever the Aussie was babbling on about this time. "Wha...WHAT??". He sighed and looked for his notes yet again. There was a translation dictionary around here somewhere, though he doubted it would clear anything that murky up. Once he felt confident he understood at least 1% of whatever this strange langauage was, "You respect this.." gesturing towards Phreddie "...thing?! Or am I supposed to respect you for having met one before...probably 5 minutes ago." Surrounded by craziness...nothing new there, then.
He sighed, it wasn't like there was much choice in the matter, the Aussie seemed determined to drag him along on this wacky adventure anyway. Finding this goat may also be of some use, so he was just going to have to quash his discomfort as best he could. This was obviously going to be one of the greater trials..
Great, now the Febreeze sniffing weregoat had to get in on the act...as if it wasn't bad enough in it's goat form...though Ravager supposed that he wouldn't be chewing up more precious belongings in human form, at least there was that to be grateful for.
In any case, none of this took him much by surprise, the unexpected was to be expected round here, right?
Perhaps this Holy Goat truly did exist if it was...uh....talked about among the goat herds. Hmmph.
Maybe this Goat would be useful to his plans. He'd tag along...for now at least. He just wondered how long he'd be able to stand the attitude of this creature.
[QUOTE=Phreddie] At this Phreddie stand sup takes a hit of febreeze, and walks outside, twenty mintues later he reenters the room, carrying three carpets and a giant wooden spool of thread, minus the thread. "here we go, I 'borrowed' these from a bum a couple of blocks away, our need is greater than his." Seeing the confused looks, Phreddie explains: " They are magic flying carpets, one for transportation, one for baggage, and the spool is for Mr. Venom, there is not enough room on the carpets for you, so you get towed behind in your spool, it will levitate, but can not move in a direction with out being pushed or pulled, I myself will fly, acting as a scout at times, but mostly I believe I shall lead this expedition, that is, i will lead if I hear no objections?..." [/QUOTE]
Ravager stood up, "Are you out of your mind?! You seriously expect me...us to ride...a...a spool?! Huh. Why should I even get involved in this?!
Flying carpets, flying goats, flying spools...is there anything normal or vaguely natural around here?!"
[QUOTE=DJV]"Don't you come the raw prawn with me Rav, you know how many of these gozwhoppers I've met, that's right, 1, this one. So a bit of respect is due. Now, where is it..."[/QUOTE]
Ravager shook his head, unable to comprehend in the slighest whatever the Aussie was babbling on about this time. "Wha...WHAT??". He sighed and looked for his notes yet again. There was a translation dictionary around here somewhere, though he doubted it would clear anything that murky up. Once he felt confident he understood at least 1% of whatever this strange langauage was, "You respect this.." gesturing towards Phreddie "...thing?! Or am I supposed to respect you for having met one before...probably 5 minutes ago." Surrounded by craziness...nothing new there, then.
He sighed, it wasn't like there was much choice in the matter, the Aussie seemed determined to drag him along on this wacky adventure anyway. Finding this goat may also be of some use, so he was just going to have to quash his discomfort as best he could. This was obviously going to be one of the greater trials..
Fiona played a tune he didn't recognize. It wasn't that good, well, at least not for a bard, but apparently, it was good enough for the spell.
Time for some questioning. "Do you leprachauns ever need to go to the bathroom and if so, how did you do it, while dancing?"
Judging from DW's eyes, a more relevant question was in order.
"What's the capitol of England?" He looked at DW, hoping this question was better, but she now looked even more irritated.
"Do you happen to know who put that spell on you?" she asked.
"Aye. Me and my homies were chillin' near the Church of Guinness. It was our favourite spot to play some music and rhyme. You see, I am a quickrhymer. We used to spit about hot witches, big wheels and goldnuggets, you know what I'm saying."
He saw some doubt on the listener's faces, so he decided to give them some.
"Yo when the guard come in the game loyalty is limited
Hardcore leprachauns start actin feminine
With the guards you do eighty five percent of your time
Duke you get ten you'll damn near do nine
Hate a liar more than I hate thief
A thief is only after my gold a liar is after my reality
The streets I know'em like my ABC's
Stay away from the D's and stack ya cheese
Try to see three hundred g's fore you see three hundred C's
Tree top to feel the breeze co connect for key's
Yo snowwhite sexin me take me to ecstacy
Once I nut (ahh oh poo) I don't want 'em next to me
If its on mother fu..." "YEAH, okay, we get it!" Dragonwench interrupted him.
"Yeah, but the abbot didn't like it and he put that spell on me"
"Wow, three hundred g's and three hundred C's. It's like math!" Icarus said.
"No, I'm talking about the dancing spell, yo!" The leprachaun said.
"Oh, I see."
Time for some questioning. "Do you leprachauns ever need to go to the bathroom and if so, how did you do it, while dancing?"
Judging from DW's eyes, a more relevant question was in order.
"What's the capitol of England?" He looked at DW, hoping this question was better, but she now looked even more irritated.
"Do you happen to know who put that spell on you?" she asked.
"Aye. Me and my homies were chillin' near the Church of Guinness. It was our favourite spot to play some music and rhyme. You see, I am a quickrhymer. We used to spit about hot witches, big wheels and goldnuggets, you know what I'm saying."
He saw some doubt on the listener's faces, so he decided to give them some.
"Yo when the guard come in the game loyalty is limited
Hardcore leprachauns start actin feminine
With the guards you do eighty five percent of your time
Duke you get ten you'll damn near do nine
Hate a liar more than I hate thief
A thief is only after my gold a liar is after my reality
The streets I know'em like my ABC's
Stay away from the D's and stack ya cheese
Try to see three hundred g's fore you see three hundred C's
Tree top to feel the breeze co connect for key's
Yo snowwhite sexin me take me to ecstacy
Once I nut (ahh oh poo) I don't want 'em next to me
If its on mother fu..." "YEAH, okay, we get it!" Dragonwench interrupted him.
"Yeah, but the abbot didn't like it and he put that spell on me"
"Wow, three hundred g's and three hundred C's. It's like math!" Icarus said.
"No, I'm talking about the dancing spell, yo!" The leprachaun said.
"Oh, I see."
[size=-1]An optimist is a badly informed pessimist.[/size]
"Friends, Symians, journey men, lend me your ears! Today is a day of exultation, today is the day that past ends and thy future begins! Let us be off on our fateful journey, The Great and Holy Goat of Spam shall be found, and the Trinity of the Holy Spam restored. Onward for the time of our action is at hand!" Phreddie hoped this would get his motley crew into action, having hitched up the train, he whispered the words he found on the paper next to the bum, and the Carpet Train set of east along the road, It was getting dark already, in about an hour he planned to stop and make camp, right next to where that dead/dying raven fell, he only hoped that those mages hadnt taken its carcass and that they had moved off
"Ho! here we are, we shall camp here for the night, I will go and graze, and look for some food for the night, If im not back in an hour, go back to town get drunk and call the sherrif." With that, Phreddie flew off into the darkness, stopping about two meters to the right of the path, there was the still breathing Raven, taking a shot of Febreeeze, Phreddie scooped the Raven up in his arms, carrying him back to camp. "Here we go, got a double hit off this one, its an almost dead talking raven! Large enough to feed a party of 5, and it can still tell us abit about these lands before we eat him." Looking around, Phreddie sees that Lasher is hungry, ready to eat, Venom is curios, and Ravager, oddly enough seems nervous, no doubt he has never been on a real adventure before, its always tough for first timers.
:: One Hour Later ::
"Ho! here we are, we shall camp here for the night, I will go and graze, and look for some food for the night, If im not back in an hour, go back to town get drunk and call the sherrif." With that, Phreddie flew off into the darkness, stopping about two meters to the right of the path, there was the still breathing Raven, taking a shot of Febreeeze, Phreddie scooped the Raven up in his arms, carrying him back to camp. "Here we go, got a double hit off this one, its an almost dead talking raven! Large enough to feed a party of 5, and it can still tell us abit about these lands before we eat him." Looking around, Phreddie sees that Lasher is hungry, ready to eat, Venom is curios, and Ravager, oddly enough seems nervous, no doubt he has never been on a real adventure before, its always tough for first timers.
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
Securing himself to a carpet and listening to the warning of a bumpy journey ahead he hoped that it wouldn't make him nausesous. He hated that. Relying on a weregoat to lead them was hardly any better. Nor was the origin of these cliche flying carpets. As far as he knew they could suddenly surrender to the force of gravity at any time while in mid-air.
The journey wasn't really as bad as expected, playing around with gadgets and looking at nnotes passed the time when he wasn't forced to hang on for dear life. At least he hadn't been given a spool to ride on.
While in transit, their speed and direction suddenly changed almost causing him to lose his balance. Preparing to berate the goat for this, he saw a flash from the corner of his eye. Looking around he saw a black shape flutter and fall to the ground. A suspiciously bird-sized black object. What were the odds of that? Another Raven...or Lenore? Not that it really mattered, either way the association between them was over. And the bird was trustworthy enough not to reveal any details. If it even had the capacity to remember events from a few hours back. Who knew how a Raven's mind worked. It was practically pea-sized so you could never expect that much.
[QUOTE=Phreddie]"Ho! here we are, we shall camp here for the night, I will go and graze, and look for some food for the night, If im not back in an hour, go back to town get drunk and call the sherrif." With that, Phreddie flew off into the darkness, stopping about two meters to the right of the path, there was the still breathing Raven, taking a shot of Febreeeze, Phreddie scooped the Raven up in his arms, carrying him back to camp. "Here we go, got a double hit off this one, its an almost dead talking raven! Large enough to feed a party of 5, and it can still tell us abit about these lands before we eat him." Looking around, Phreddie sees that Lasher is hungry, ready to eat, Venom is curios, and Ravager, oddly enough seems nervous, no doubt he has never been on a real adventure before, its always tough for first timers.[/QUOTE]
"Oh, yeah, that's nice. Let's talk to the near-dead raven before killing it. Didn't anyone think to bring food along? Or you suddenly think Raven is gourmet food?" Ravager sighed, "You may as well kill it now or release it, it's senses are probably jangled anyway. And why does every animal have to talk or fly round here?!"
Of course, the bird might reveal something most unsavoury, he didn't know if it was Lenore or not. Ravens all tended to look the same to him. "Talk to it if you want, but you can't trust whatever it says anyway."
The journey wasn't really as bad as expected, playing around with gadgets and looking at nnotes passed the time when he wasn't forced to hang on for dear life. At least he hadn't been given a spool to ride on.
While in transit, their speed and direction suddenly changed almost causing him to lose his balance. Preparing to berate the goat for this, he saw a flash from the corner of his eye. Looking around he saw a black shape flutter and fall to the ground. A suspiciously bird-sized black object. What were the odds of that? Another Raven...or Lenore? Not that it really mattered, either way the association between them was over. And the bird was trustworthy enough not to reveal any details. If it even had the capacity to remember events from a few hours back. Who knew how a Raven's mind worked. It was practically pea-sized so you could never expect that much.
[QUOTE=Phreddie]"Ho! here we are, we shall camp here for the night, I will go and graze, and look for some food for the night, If im not back in an hour, go back to town get drunk and call the sherrif." With that, Phreddie flew off into the darkness, stopping about two meters to the right of the path, there was the still breathing Raven, taking a shot of Febreeeze, Phreddie scooped the Raven up in his arms, carrying him back to camp. "Here we go, got a double hit off this one, its an almost dead talking raven! Large enough to feed a party of 5, and it can still tell us abit about these lands before we eat him." Looking around, Phreddie sees that Lasher is hungry, ready to eat, Venom is curios, and Ravager, oddly enough seems nervous, no doubt he has never been on a real adventure before, its always tough for first timers.[/QUOTE]
"Oh, yeah, that's nice. Let's talk to the near-dead raven before killing it. Didn't anyone think to bring food along? Or you suddenly think Raven is gourmet food?" Ravager sighed, "You may as well kill it now or release it, it's senses are probably jangled anyway. And why does every animal have to talk or fly round here?!"
Of course, the bird might reveal something most unsavoury, he didn't know if it was Lenore or not. Ravens all tended to look the same to him. "Talk to it if you want, but you can't trust whatever it says anyway."
Slade finally comes too, he had received a vision or message through telepathy or magic, but didnt understand the message
slade could only remember the last thing that happened before the vision and that was DW telling him about the raven, could these be connected? and where was Fiona the bard whom he came all this way to see sing.
he went to ask where they had gone to from a local guest at the pub its seems they had gone on a quest to find pancakes...my favorite
Slade grabbed his swords from DW room upstairs......she always manages to keep them in nice conditions when he come to visit. he may be able to catch up with them if he hurried or at least pursue them from afar to make sure no ones is following them.
slade then goes out the back to get his horse...as he mounts up and leaves the stables he travels along the path of horse tracks and sees DW and Fiona talking to a leprachaun in the distance
slade could only remember the last thing that happened before the vision and that was DW telling him about the raven, could these be connected? and where was Fiona the bard whom he came all this way to see sing.
he went to ask where they had gone to from a local guest at the pub its seems they had gone on a quest to find pancakes...my favorite
Slade grabbed his swords from DW room upstairs......she always manages to keep them in nice conditions when he come to visit. he may be able to catch up with them if he hurried or at least pursue them from afar to make sure no ones is following them.
slade then goes out the back to get his horse...as he mounts up and leaves the stables he travels along the path of horse tracks and sees DW and Fiona talking to a leprachaun in the distance
Wondering how vampires live the life they live.....
seriously I dont know how they sleep during the day, I have a twitch everytime I hear a loud sound as I slumber, everytime ....Im just waiting to pounce on the poor mortal who creates a sound while I sleep in during the day. /rant
seriously I dont know how they sleep during the day, I have a twitch everytime I hear a loud sound as I slumber, everytime ....Im just waiting to pounce on the poor mortal who creates a sound while I sleep in during the day. /rant
-
TonyMontana1638
- Posts: 4598
- Joined: Sat Aug 20, 2005 11:10 pm
- Location: Chasing nuns out in the yard
He could see.
Suddenly it was all clear to him.
He couldn't remember, or understand, anything that had happened in the last handful of hours.
He came to and found himself standing at the edge of a river, a canoe in front of him.
He sensed motion to his left.
Turning, his eyes fell upon a face familiar to him.
Chus.
Lying beside him was a backpack full of Ice Mountain bottled water: where it came from, he had no idea.
"Chus," Tony said, tentatively. "What in the hell is going on?"
"Huh? Whatta ya mean?" Chus asked, looking confused. "We're going to capture Mag before he gets to his lair, remember?"
"We are? Not that it isn't a good idea, but why?" Tony asked.
"What's a matter with you eh?" Chus said, fixing a bewildered stare on Tony.
"No idea, but I have no idea what's going on... All I remember was sitting at my table, drinking my 5th mug of Guiness and staring at Fiona," Tony said thoughtfully, a worried look on his face.
"Yeah, then you got up on your table and started doing your best Michael Flatley impression: Riverdance isn't your forte, friend. DW threw you out..."
Suddenly the realization stuck them.
"I was hungover," Tony whispered. "And now..."
"Aw sonuvabitch you're lucid again... Does that mean I have to tell you everything that's been going on?" Chus said, exasperated. "We'll get to that later, all you need to know is Ik has apparently become a love interest."
Tony suddenly became overcome with laughter.
"I know, I didn't think girls were into the whole scythe-wielding-grim-reaper-cynic either, but... Oh by the way, Fiona thinks I'm stronger than you... She was admiring my guns earlier." Chus quipped, kissing his biceps.
Tony began to choke from lack of oxygen in his mirth.
Suddenly it was all clear to him.
He couldn't remember, or understand, anything that had happened in the last handful of hours.
He came to and found himself standing at the edge of a river, a canoe in front of him.
He sensed motion to his left.
Turning, his eyes fell upon a face familiar to him.
Chus.
Lying beside him was a backpack full of Ice Mountain bottled water: where it came from, he had no idea.
"Chus," Tony said, tentatively. "What in the hell is going on?"
"Huh? Whatta ya mean?" Chus asked, looking confused. "We're going to capture Mag before he gets to his lair, remember?"
"We are? Not that it isn't a good idea, but why?" Tony asked.
"What's a matter with you eh?" Chus said, fixing a bewildered stare on Tony.
"No idea, but I have no idea what's going on... All I remember was sitting at my table, drinking my 5th mug of Guiness and staring at Fiona," Tony said thoughtfully, a worried look on his face.
"Yeah, then you got up on your table and started doing your best Michael Flatley impression: Riverdance isn't your forte, friend. DW threw you out..."
Suddenly the realization stuck them.
"I was hungover," Tony whispered. "And now..."
"Aw sonuvabitch you're lucid again... Does that mean I have to tell you everything that's been going on?" Chus said, exasperated. "We'll get to that later, all you need to know is Ik has apparently become a love interest."
Tony suddenly became overcome with laughter.
"I know, I didn't think girls were into the whole scythe-wielding-grim-reaper-cynic either, but... Oh by the way, Fiona thinks I'm stronger than you... She was admiring my guns earlier." Chus quipped, kissing his biceps.
Tony began to choke from lack of oxygen in his mirth.
"Be thankful you're healthy."
"Be bitter you're not going to stay that way."
"Be glad you're even alive."
"Be furious you're going to die."
"Things could be much worse."
"They could be one hell of a lot better."
"Be bitter you're not going to stay that way."
"Be glad you're even alive."
"Be furious you're going to die."
"Things could be much worse."
"They could be one hell of a lot better."
Lasher was fasting. Shiva, the destroyer, and his beloved god had been trying to tell him something, and for the first time in his life, he didn't understand. All he could tell was that something was amiss with his dark, brooding companion Ravager. His black aura seemingly defied his strongest divinations, which suggested he'd more power than he presented. This might have been more serious if he'd not sensed earlier that nearly everyone in the tap 'n tea hadn't had something to hide.
His meditation was interrupted by the were-goat, who offered him some food. He resisted the urge to snap the man's neck, for though he did fulfill his purpose for the greater good, Shiva's teachings of detachment and cycles did not require saintly actions. Instead, he smiled, politely declined, and made small talk with the dj.
His meditation was interrupted by the were-goat, who offered him some food. He resisted the urge to snap the man's neck, for though he did fulfill his purpose for the greater good, Shiva's teachings of detachment and cycles did not require saintly actions. Instead, he smiled, politely declined, and made small talk with the dj.
i'm breakin through i'm bending spoons i'm keepin flowers in full bloom i'm lookin for answers from the great beyond
Sir Magrus strode through the corridors of his house to the stairs leading the the lower levels. Murmering, he brought forth a ball of light and rushed down the stairs, passing doors, ignoring the loud noises behind them which normally brought a smile to his lips. He turned suddenly to look at one and then knocked furiously. "Go away, I'm entertaining here!" an irritated voice shouted. Crouching to look through the keyhole, Sir Magrus quietly chanted and a shout echoed through the room and hallway, then feet thumping on the floor followed.
The door swung inwards and Sir Magrus stood up to see the now soot-covered Locke glaring at him. Locke said "This had better be important..." and Sir Magrus said "Some fools have gotten it into their heads that my home is to be raided for booze and supplies." Locke's eyes narrowed and he said "That is important. Hold on a moment." Turning, he went back inside, and soft murming came from within. A crash and then shouting ensued with Locke yelling "But schnookem's, I have to go, it is for your safety!" A voice returned "And I'm coming with you!"
Locke sighed and came out of the room, dressed in leathers and an odd black mask. A short figure followed, running behind with its head down, skidding to a stop in front of Sir Magrus. The figure looked up suddenly and said "Oh, hullo there! We're off to fight the raiders, aren't we?" cheerily and Magrus saw that it was shockingly, Fas.
The door swung inwards and Sir Magrus stood up to see the now soot-covered Locke glaring at him. Locke said "This had better be important..." and Sir Magrus said "Some fools have gotten it into their heads that my home is to be raided for booze and supplies." Locke's eyes narrowed and he said "That is important. Hold on a moment." Turning, he went back inside, and soft murming came from within. A crash and then shouting ensued with Locke yelling "But schnookem's, I have to go, it is for your safety!" A voice returned "And I'm coming with you!"
Locke sighed and came out of the room, dressed in leathers and an odd black mask. A short figure followed, running behind with its head down, skidding to a stop in front of Sir Magrus. The figure looked up suddenly and said "Oh, hullo there! We're off to fight the raiders, aren't we?" cheerily and Magrus saw that it was shockingly, Fas.
"You can do whatever you want to me."
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"
"Oh, so I can crate you and hide you in the warehouse at the end of Raiders?"
"So funny, kiss me funny boy!" / *Sprays mace* " I know, I know, bad for the ozone"