The HBI - Heathen Bureau of Investigation

Fiona · Post by **Fiona** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 3:58 pm

[QUOTE=Darzog]Shana if you read that closely you should realize that she wasn't doing that while she was "not drinking". And off-the-cuff legislation to support your current biases is an exact replica of the current legal system in both the US and UK (and her being druk just makes it that much more realistic, way to pay attention to the details Fiona!)

Chu, don't you think these guys have enough on their plate wading through Fiona's legal demonstrations? You can have your turn next.[/QUOTE]

*looks indignant* Stone cold sober at the time I researched the legal position, Dar. now do you see why I prefer me drunk? :laugh:

Darzog · Post by **Darzog** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 3:59 pm

GRRR, double post.

Why are you looking at me indignantly? I'm saying that you are that eloquent and articulate when drunk.... is that a bad thing? OK, so I'm saying you're a lush too but if the shoe fits. :laugh:

Fiona · Post by **Fiona** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:08 pm

*Tries on shoe* Yep. I really did go to the ball

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:09 pm

Chu, while the official courts appear to have no time for your case, I have made some private inquiries at the expense and in the interest of the general public, and am happy to inform you I have determined not only the hired gun who actually closed the factory, but also he who hired said gun.

Unfortunately the Lord Xandax could not be prosecuted, nor his reputation damaged by any attempts made by myself or my contemporaries. However, the Hirer of the Lord has no such protection.

After stalking this elusive character for some time I have come to the conclusion that his crime was to heinous to be simply drawn and quartered or burned at the stake. Furthermore it was not heinous enough to warrant any period of incarceration in the Tent of Burning Manly Love. The only fitting punishment for this feind is for a period of confinement in the Harem Tent, and to be gaurded over and regularly punished by the Twisted Sisters and their contemporaries.

As to the identity of this devil incarnate, I am proud to say that after much investigation, and hours of peering through first story windows from behind the bushes in the rain, I have discovered that he is none other than ourself Chu.

I hereby call upon the Lady Dragon Wench to escort Chu to his final destination and follow my recommendations for the punsihment of his crime as she fits. *Calls for DW*

Fiona · Post by **Fiona** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:29 pm

I wish to draw to the court's attention that Ravager,by his own admission, has not attended any law school, and therefore has no right of audience in this place. This is in itself an offence, and should be considered as a separate case. If DN cannot find counsel he may represent himself or the court may appoint a lawyer for him

ch85us2001 · Post by **ch85us2001** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:30 pm

Wait a minute . . . DW is taking me to a tent? That is bad . . . How?

Oh. *Cough* I was framed!!!!!!!! Ravager did it to get his own thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He payed off Fable, who used his considerable leverage with Xandax to get him to close it, and clean Fables hands of guilt in the Process!!! I demand a recount!!!!

@ Dar: I don't have time for hippy propaganda.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:36 pm

[QUOTE=Fiona]I wish to draw to the court's attention that Ravager,by his own admission, has not attended any law school, and therefore has no right of audience in this place. This is in itself an offence, and should be considered as a separate case. If DN cannot find counsel he may represent himself or the court may appoint a lawyer for him[/QUOTE]
I was asked to step up...so don't blame that on me.

And yep, I'm free of more duties...

JonIrenicus · Post by **JonIrenicus** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:39 pm

ooooo Someone make me look bad

Darzog · Post by **Darzog** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:43 pm

*hands Jon a mirror*

JonIrenicus · Post by **JonIrenicus** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:47 pm

[QUOTE=Darzog]*hands Jon a mirror*[/QUOTE]

Pffft... I got those... scars taken out a while ago

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 4:54 pm

[QUOTE=ch85us2001]Wait a minute . . . DW is taking me to a tent? That is bad . . . How?

Oh. *Cough* I was framed!!!!!!!! Ravager did it to get his own thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He payed off Fable, who used his considerable leverage with Xandax to get him to close it, and clean Fables hands of guilt in the Process!!! I demand a recount!!!!

@ Dar: I don't have time for hippy propaganda.[/QUOTE]
You dont know what the Dark Flames can do to your mind do you? At first it seems all fun and games, like you got off on the better side of scott free, but soon you become a slave to their will, no free will of your own. You will follow them ceaselessly, hunting them, your only objective is to serve and bask in their glory long after you have been released.

Some wonder why the Lord Bloodstalker is so reclusive, so private. It is because he is still nursing an ancient wound, one he recieved at the rejecting hands of one of the Flames. he turned to the sewers, and rarely emerged, now that this Flame has passed into relative obscurity, he appears more often, with nary a mention of his Lady Love. He was powerful enough to overcome their charms for just long enough to see the truth, and it broke him.*

The evidence is irrefutable Chu, there was no framing. After you broke off your engagement with another Kitten, you sank into a deep depression, formally requesting the closing of the Spam Factory. It is all a matter of record. People did not pursue any legal options against you at the time because of a mixed feeling of amusement, pity, and gried.

*The above story is embellished, slightly modified, and subtly enhanced to further an individuals goals, the unsaid individual claims no responsibility for misconceptions and ill concieved feelins generated by the stories proliferation

slade · Post by **slade** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 2:24 pm

The Spam factory case is closed due to us all knowing that the person who is pushing this case to be investigated is the person whom asked it to be closed in the first place.

Thank you for that document Fiona.
Rav your statement about Fiona's evidence has been overruled.

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 2:30 pm

I'm totally confused...

What is all of this talk about the Dark Flames?
I poke my head in here on a whim, only to find my old comrades being evoked in vein...

And for the record, I have no intention of dragging any of you anywhere

Spoiler

Unless it is to place you upon Waverly's ancient and forgotten rack of torture and peril

slade · Post by **slade** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 2:59 pm

[QUOTE=dragon wench]Waverly's rack[/QUOTE]
Waverly has breast.....

this must be inspected....uh...errr.. investigated:mischief:

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 3:18 pm

[QUOTE=slade]Waverly has breast.....

this must be inspected....uh...errr.. investigated:mischief:[/QUOTE]

You sound intensely interested... That is extremely disturbing...

slade · Post by **slade** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 3:21 pm

[QUOTE=dragon wench]You sound intensely interested... That is extremely disturbing...

[/QUOTE]
lol....will its been a while since I have investigated breast....I guess at this point any will do:laugh:

.....................

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 3:25 pm

[QUOTE=slade]lol....will its been a while since I have investigated breast....I guess at this point any will do:laugh:

.....................

[/QUOTE]

You are just really lucky Waverly is not around to hear you say that...

I wouldn't rate your chances of survival as being very high

slade · Post by **slade** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 3:31 pm

[QUOTE=dragon wench]You are just really lucky Waverly is not around to hear you say that...

I wouldn't rate your chances of survival as being very high

[/QUOTE]
oooo fiesty I see

:devil:

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 3:36 pm

Not Fiesty, picture 'The Joker' from Batman, in Homaphrodite form. With a hint of the Penguin and Scarecrow. And th emindset of Two Face.

slade · Post by **slade** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 4:22 pm

Phreddie have you been dreaming of waverly