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granted......


i wish i never get sad!

Your wish is granted. Then suddenly, one of your close friends dies in a tragic accident. All your friends mourn and weep, but you on the other hand are unable to shed a tear. Your friends can't believe this and think you're a heartless bastard. They stop returning your calls. Everyone stops returning your calls, because your constant happiness isn't contagious, it's a big pain in the arse. You move into the forest, solitarily, alone. But at least your happy!

I wish I could solve all the riddles in the SYM riddle thread

Granted. I resurrect the SYM Riddle thread (could actually do that ) and start posting riddles up again. You find my riddle source and beat DJV to the punch, posting the answer before he does. You quickly get bored of this however and DJV takes the crown once more.

I wish it were comfortably warmer today. (Is this what they have to put up with in Norway?? ).

However due to Rav's extremely weird personality, comfortably warm for him means extremely hot in real terms. You end up frying the planet and removing all moisture, dooming the human race. [for the other one, I wish I could have hunted him down in anger ]

I wish I had an AK-47.

[QUOTE=dj_venom]I wish I had an AK-47. [/QUOTE]Granted. You are arrested and jailed for illegal possession of an assault rifle.

I wish I owned a nice little island in the Caribean with a lovely house on it.

You own the island, but are unaware that there is a leper coloney nearby. They quickly infect you and soon enough, lending a hand, means so much more .

I wish I had an army of the night to do my bidding.

[QUOTE=Lestat]Granted. You are arrested and jailed for illegal possession of an assault rifle.[/QUOTE]

Interesting, HK-47 / AK-47

Never thought about that before.

G'day mate, feel free to join in. Simply read the first post and you'll see how it works in no time.

[QUOTE=dj_venom]I wish I had an army of the night to do my bidding.[/QUOTE]

The army of the night marches on it's stomach and it likes alcohol too. Your vampiric forces tarry too long in a pub and exit only to find out it's daytime. *sizzle* Your army of the night is now ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

I wish I could spam even more!

*ACCESS DENIED!* Your wish could not be granted as it is already in progress .

I wish Australia had won the Ashes this year .

Granted. I enter DJV in a competition to win this book: http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASI ... 80-6884661
And he wins for Australia!

I wish coursework was easier to complete.

You cheeky little...

The coursework becomes so easy that you no longer study because you know it so well. Then you stop attending because you already know it. You miss out on hearing when the exam is, and ultimately fail the subject.

I wish it would snow in Queensland.

Always willing to make a dig.

Granted. It starts to snow...and never stops. Eventually you're forced to move out and Queensland is written off.

I wish to distribute copies of the book I found above to ALL Aussies (otherwise known as 'Straiyans)!

After attempting to give it to the first person, that person instantly calls the terrorist hotline. Within minutes you are arrested for conspiring against the Australian cricket team. John Howard then holds you for several days... even though there is absolutely no proof of any criminal intent. Why? Because he can. During those days you meet several lonely male convicts, and, well, you know what happens...

I wish I had my own cartoon show.

Granted. You are instantaneously transformed into Wile E Coyote.

I wish they'd come and repair my ceiling

Your wish is granted: they come and repair your ceiling. Now they won't leave.

I wish I could get good grades in every school subject

[QUOTE=TheAmazingOopah]

I wish I could get good grades in every school subject[/QUOTE]

Your wish is granted. You become the envy and subject of loathing of all your classmates. The only way to counter your loneliness is to do everyone's assignments. You are left with no time to yourself, and end up with a nervous breakdown.

I wish I could find a way to reduce my morning coffee dependency...

[QUOTE=dragon wench]Your wish is granted. You become the envy and subject of loathing of all your classmates. The only way to counter your loneliness is to do everyone's assignments. You are left with no time to yourself, and end up with a nervous breakdown.

I wish I could find a way to reduce my morning coffee dependency... [/QUOTE]
Granted

You find a way to reduce your morning coffee, but end up addicted in cola -drinks

I wish I was a devil :devil:

[QUOTE=Kipi]I wish I was a devil :devil:[/QUOTE]I hear and obey *flourish* You now burn in hell.

I wish I could drink as much coffee as I want, without it having effect on my falling asleep.

Granted. You find a decaffeinated coffee which tastes as good as the real thing. You drink as much as you like with no effect on your sleep pattern. Sadly the decaffeinated coffee causes you to develop Tourette's syndrome and you are fired from your job.You can only get very low status poorly paid employment. You have to fight for reinstatement and having no money cannot afford a lawyer. Therefore you have to stay up all night most nights preparing your case. When you get a hearing you swear at the judge and have to start another appeal against your conviction for contempt of court. You have to stay up all night preparing your case. Etc.....

I wish I was a lawyer