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So sue me, I couldn't stay away from posting jokes

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon.

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!

My check list...


3) I will get dressed before noon.Failed

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.Failed

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.Failed

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.Failed

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.Failed

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.Failed

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.Failed

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.Failed

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!Failed

Hmmm.... perhaps we need some more advanced methods for you, Weasel!

*ponders deep in thought for many moments...*

Originally posted by Vehemence:
<STRONG>Hmmm.... perhaps we need some more advanced methods for you, Weasel!

*ponders deep in thought for many moments...* </STRONG>

Well I did pass three of them..

1.Don't drink coffee.

2.Don't eat breakfast.

11. Wife figures check book up .

Originally posted by Weasel:
<STRONG>Well I did pass three of them..

1.Don't drink coffee.

2.Don't eat breakfast.

11. Wife figures check book up . </STRONG>

That's the spirit Weasel, always look on the bright side of Spam! Er, I mean life

Well, I'm a coffee addict,

I'm never up for breakfast,

and I have yet to get a wife...

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web. Don't drink coffee and don't read newspaper, so Passed

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing. Rarely even eat breakfast, so Passed

3) I will get dressed before noon. First thing I do every morning, about 10-15 minutes after I wake up, is get up and get dressed, so Passed

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web. Mom cleans the house, washes clothes, and we don't eat dinner, so Passed

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived. All my friends and family have the Web, so Passed

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web. See 5, so Passed

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how. I read books while online, so Passed

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web. Only TV close enough to cause such a problem isn't hooked up to the Satelite, so Passsed

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email. That reminds me...I need to check my email. Passed

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not. I do, thanks to church and school. Passed

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web. Don't have a husband or wife yet; but mom balances my account on her computer. I also don't write checks, I use a debit card. Passed

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow! Failed

[ 09-24-2001: Message edited by: Sailor Saturn ]

you don't have breakfast and don't have dinner. Are you thin?

Originally posted by Dark Angel:
<STRONG>you don't have breakfast and don't have dinner. Are you thin?</STRONG>

Yep.

thought so

lets see here

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.
Passed dont do either

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.
Passed dont eat breakfast either

3) I will get dressed before noon.
Passed on weekdays only....

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.
FAILED BADLY i go without cleaning and washing dishes months at a time and i never make dinner

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.
Failed i hate writing letters

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.
Passed i talk to my girlfriend on phone ;P

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.
Passed i have to read for bloody school

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.
Passed i have my own room so i have my own tv and i do listen to my parents wine about me not cleaning my room

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.
Passed i check email while TV is on i can do both at the same time

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.
Passed i get outa the house every day for school or to something on weekend

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.
Passed i dont have a checkbook but my dad manages my parents

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!
Passed my parents turn off the internet every night at 10:00 now so i do go to bed

Well i didnt do to bad did i

Posted by Veh -

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web. Passed - I do not go on the net in the morning

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing. Passed - I don't have breakfast until I am in work

3) I will get dressed before noon. Passed - I am in work by 7:30

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web. passed, I think, though I don't do housework on Fridays

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived. Passed - but I don't do letters. I call them

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web. Passed, *makes mental note to get another line put in*

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how. Passed - I read at bedtime

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web. Passed - I only go on the web when kids in school/at friends and d/h at work

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email. I rarely watch TV...usually news or documentaries...but I don't come on the net just to check emails so passed

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not. Passed. I have to

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web. Passed (as a book-keeper it is a kind of compulsion)

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow! erm - so THAT is why I am always tired

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon. I get dressed as soon as I get out of bed...At one o'clock...

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web. Parents 8)

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived. See SS's 5

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web. See SS's 5

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how. Every night!

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web. No one is in my room but me.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email. Don't watch TV. 8)

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not. School, Trumpet, Social life

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web. Don't have checking account!

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow! -- 22:00 every night!

Does your mum make you go to bed or do you have a iron will

@ SS = LOL!!!!!

My turn...

1. I don't read the newspaper or drink coffee... I read the news on the Web, and feed my neopets... I FAILED.
2. I eat pop tarts for breakfast, so I don't need my hands at all really, so... FAILED
3. I got dressed at 1:30 today... FAILED
4. I didn't have dinner today because I was online... FAILED
5. All my friends have the Web, and those that don't, well, sorry... FAILED
6. I only "call" on Paltalk. FAILED
7. I only read when a new Chicken Soup comes out, so... FAILED
8. Just FAILED
9. I don't even watch the TV, I spend all my time online, so I FAILED.
10. I was grounded all last week, so FAILED.
11. I'm only 15, I don't do the checkbook, so FAILED
12. I stayed up MAD late last time I was online, so, FAILED


I got straight F's... does Vehemence hafta have a Parent-Teacher Conference with my dad now?

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.Failed what do you mean b4 the web

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.Failed i use a spoon !

3) I will get dressed before noon.
Failed on weekends
4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.Failed I am a kid!

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.Failed

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.Failed

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.Passed

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web. Half passed i watch telly/Listen to music and go on the web

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email. Passed because i already am

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.
Passed

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.
Um whats balencing a check book?

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow! Failed

Originally posted by Vehemence:
<STRONG>1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon.

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!</STRONG>

1)No coffee (hot chocolat works though ), newspaper yes, PASSED
2)FAILED
3)FAILED
4)FAILED
5)FAILED
6)Phone is faster, PASSED
7)PASSED
8)FAILED, if the TV's too loud, I just turn the music up
9)FAILED
10)PASSED and FAILED
11)N/A
12)FAILED

Lets see... 3.5 out of 11. FAILED

1 failed
2 failed
3 failed
4 failed
5 failed
6 failed
7 passed
8 failed
9 failed
10 failed
11 failed
12 failed


hey i got one! is there still hope for me?