GameBanshee Forums

Women…
There are certain days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and the kitchen knives start flying.

Here is how to navigate the perilous waters while dealing with your better half at that difficult time (I’ve gotten this guide from a friend of mine):

Dangerous: What’s for dinner?

Safer: Can I help you with dinner?

Safest: Where would you like to go for dinner?

Ultra-safe: Here, have some wine.


Dangerous: Are you wearing That?

Safer: You sure look good in brown!

Safest: WOW! Look at you!

Ultra-safe: Here, have some wine.


Dangerous: What are you so worked up about?

Safer: Could we be overreacting?

Safest: Here's my paycheck.

Ultra-safe: Here, have some wine.


Dangerous: Should you be eating that?

Safer: You know, there is a lot of apples left.

Safest: Can I get you a piece of chocolate?

Ultra-safe: Here, have some wine.


Dangerous: What did you DO all day?

Safer: I hope you didn't over-do it today.

Safest: I've always loved you in that robe!

Ultra-safe: Here, have some wine.

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For the record: Wal-Mart wine won't cut it, you cheapskate. Unless a huge diamond is to be found in the glass.

Heh...good stuff here.

Though, not sure if "Here, have some wine" is an ultra-safe response all the time.

Woman- "I've been working my butt off all day trying to scrape by for the rent and you're still sitting here on your ass watching TV, is that all you've done all day?!?!"

Man- "Have some wine...."


Now they need a lawyer.

Lady Dragonfly wrote:For the record: Wal-Mart wine won't cut it, you cheapskate. Unless a huge diamond is to be found in the glass.

i think during that... time... its safer to skip the glass entirely and just shove the bottle down her throat.

*chuckles*
I've seen this before, it's always been a favourite.. Hell, I won't knock any reason at all to be buttered up with wine..

Though... come to think of it... I've never entirely understood why some women get so touchy about the "that time of the month" topic.. In my view it's the perfect occasion to let out the inner bitch and get away with it..

I could have sworn i've seen this list before. Though wine wasn't the alcoholic beverage of choice... was it gin and tonic? Or vodka? I can't recall.

You ain't getting any of my wine. It is too expensive to use each month

It's far, far cheaper to use the patented "run and hide" method, I must say!

I'm quite a fan of "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" as well.