Cespenar says, "Why you not be downloading Kelsey yet?"
Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2002 4:21 pm
We, the developers of the Kelsey NPC mod, have been trying to secure celebrity endorsement for Kelsey for some time. Unfortunately, on the sort of budget a free download can generate, this has not been easy.
Eventually, our press people contacted Cespenar's press people and, after extended negotiation, we are proud to present the following joint announcement.
--Dateline: Pocket Plane, The Abyss
Hello, computer peoples! Cespenar here!
Why you not be downloading Kelsey yet? Is you not familiar with the cutting and pasting of addresses like http://www.forgottenwars.net/kelsey/ where you can find all the download addresses for Kelsey?
Cespenar wishes that someone would let him join the Great One's party! Could bring many recipes on the road, oh yes! But in meantime, maybe you would like help of someone like Kelsey? He is a nice redheaded peoples who casts many spells and serves the Great One! Almost as good as Cespenar.
Kelsey comes in a ZIP file and is very easy to install on your thing with all the blinking lights. ZIP is okay, but Cespenar prefers RAR files. RAR. RAAAAAAAAAAAR!! Did Cespenar scare you?
Kelsey is one of the human peoples, and knows all about sorcery, which means he casts lots and lots of spells but does not stay up all night drinking coffee and reading dusty old spellbooks. This is good, because lets Cespenar do more cleaning at night. Big peoples stay up late, they make bigger messes, means Cespenar has to work harder.
So, why you not be downloading Kelsey already?
You maybe heard that sorcerers be sucky? You must have enough wax in your ears to make candles! Sorcerers have more tricks up their sleeves than Cespenar has sleeves, and Cespenar has SOME wardrobe, I will have youse know!
Cespenar serves the Great One, but Cespenar knows even Great Ones get lonely. Makes Cespenar sad to see. Also very dangerous for Cespenar when the Great One is pent-up and cranky. So if your Great One is a lady human, elfie, half-elfie, or halfling peoples, Kelsey will blow in her ear and do all that mushy stuff! Gross!
You no like the mushy stuff? Ooooooookay, your loss...but Kelsey has lots of things to say to other big peoples, like Minsc and Korgan and Keldorn and all of the Great One's other friends.
Kelsey even comes with new shiny ones! Not as good as shiny ones Cespenar makes, but they not bad. Wears dark red cloak, looks like bull cape. Toro! Toro! Cespenar would be great bullfighter!
Okay, Cespenar done with contractual obligations to promote Kelsey. Must get back to polishing Great One's shrimp forks. You go be good big peoples and download Kelsey now.
http://www.forgottenwars.net/kelsey/
[disclaimer: This is a light-hearted plug for the Kelsey NPC add-on and is not meant to imply an endorsement by Bioware, Black Isle/Interplay, or BG2 fans out there who call themselves "Cespenar."]
Eventually, our press people contacted Cespenar's press people and, after extended negotiation, we are proud to present the following joint announcement.
--Dateline: Pocket Plane, The Abyss
Hello, computer peoples! Cespenar here!
Why you not be downloading Kelsey yet? Is you not familiar with the cutting and pasting of addresses like http://www.forgottenwars.net/kelsey/ where you can find all the download addresses for Kelsey?
Cespenar wishes that someone would let him join the Great One's party! Could bring many recipes on the road, oh yes! But in meantime, maybe you would like help of someone like Kelsey? He is a nice redheaded peoples who casts many spells and serves the Great One! Almost as good as Cespenar.
Kelsey comes in a ZIP file and is very easy to install on your thing with all the blinking lights. ZIP is okay, but Cespenar prefers RAR files. RAR. RAAAAAAAAAAAR!! Did Cespenar scare you?
Kelsey is one of the human peoples, and knows all about sorcery, which means he casts lots and lots of spells but does not stay up all night drinking coffee and reading dusty old spellbooks. This is good, because lets Cespenar do more cleaning at night. Big peoples stay up late, they make bigger messes, means Cespenar has to work harder.
So, why you not be downloading Kelsey already?
You maybe heard that sorcerers be sucky? You must have enough wax in your ears to make candles! Sorcerers have more tricks up their sleeves than Cespenar has sleeves, and Cespenar has SOME wardrobe, I will have youse know!
Cespenar serves the Great One, but Cespenar knows even Great Ones get lonely. Makes Cespenar sad to see. Also very dangerous for Cespenar when the Great One is pent-up and cranky. So if your Great One is a lady human, elfie, half-elfie, or halfling peoples, Kelsey will blow in her ear and do all that mushy stuff! Gross!
You no like the mushy stuff? Ooooooookay, your loss...but Kelsey has lots of things to say to other big peoples, like Minsc and Korgan and Keldorn and all of the Great One's other friends.
Kelsey even comes with new shiny ones! Not as good as shiny ones Cespenar makes, but they not bad. Wears dark red cloak, looks like bull cape. Toro! Toro! Cespenar would be great bullfighter!
Okay, Cespenar done with contractual obligations to promote Kelsey. Must get back to polishing Great One's shrimp forks. You go be good big peoples and download Kelsey now.
http://www.forgottenwars.net/kelsey/
[disclaimer: This is a light-hearted plug for the Kelsey NPC add-on and is not meant to imply an endorsement by Bioware, Black Isle/Interplay, or BG2 fans out there who call themselves "Cespenar."]
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