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Spam email filtering, great poetry, and marketing
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 8:41 am
by fable
I'm in the process of acquiring a freeware spam filter, at the moment. (I'd do shareware, but all those I've found leave out features which are only initialized after you've paid, and I won't pay for something I can't test in totality.) I went to one page that offered a product with the significant name of SpamWeasel. Before listing its features, it included a bit of, well, poetry:
"Once there was a weasel that was set to guard my mail
A task both large and complex that many others failed
But Spam the little weasel bared his fangs and growled
And sent the spammers running off with their trousers fouled
Its hard to find a product that meets your expectations
But Spam the little Weasel deserves hearty congratulations." -- Allan Tisdell
Now, I ask you, doesn't this make you want to rush right out and try the software?
And just what is Weasel's connection with this product?
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 8:59 am
by Ned Flanders
Alas, the next great conspiracy. I would think if folks around here believed Weasel had any direct involvement with the Spam Weasel project, they would steer clear of the final product in fear of Weasel gaining total control of their computer (which he probably already has).
The poem is tough to resist though, quite clever.
by allan tisdell
And sent the spammers running off with their trousers fouled
He's probably been sitting on this line for years waiting for the right opportunity to use it.
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:24 am
by Weasel
Originally posted by fable
And just what is Weasel's connection with this product?
Due to my lawyers advice...I cannot tell you I get 35% of the gross profit, plus a hidden cookie allowing access to your computer.
Location...it will be in your C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM and will imbed itself and cause you to have to reformat to get rid of it. Sorry this will not be anywhere in the EUA.
Now please disregard this message and help Weasel support his 3500 children.... today.
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:29 am
by HighLordDave
Re: Re: Spam email filtering, great poetry, and marketing
Originally posted by Weasel
it will be in your C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM
It wouldn't just happen to be a file named jdbgmgr.exe, would it?
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:41 am
by Weasel
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:48 am
by HighLordDave
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:55 am
by KidD01
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 9:58 am
by Weasel
LMFAO
Originally posted by HighLordDave
[turns on imitation blonde voice]But I just got this email telling me that file is a virus and I should deleted it . . . [/turns off imitation blonde voice]
[turns on imitation Darth Vadar voice]
Disregard the e-mail. [/.....decides not to turn off Darth Vadar voice]
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 10:15 am
by fable
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 10:44 am
by KidD01
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 10:52 am
by Weasel
Re: Re: Re: Spam email filtering, great poetry, and marketing
Originally posted by fable
The idea of 3500 Weasels all frisking about the Internet
Frisking....I like that
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 11:51 am
by fable
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 3:04 pm
by Bruide
i saw a funny weasel
it sat upon a hill
it ate my snacks and robbed my kids
and started turning tricks.
soon it wrecked my laptop
with email spam and porn
and twice it chewed my modem
so i hit it with a stick.
sorry.
Never drink the purple beer. Ever.
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:04 pm
by Stilgar
Originally posted by Bruide
sorry.
Never drink the purple beer. Ever.
A little off-topic, but:
Purple beer???? That sounds scary.
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:18 pm
by Georgi
Originally posted by fable
And just what is Weasel's connection with this product?
Evidently none. The proof? The software claims to prevent spam... it can't be anything to do with Weasel.
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:29 pm
by Minerva
Originally posted by Weasel
Frisking....I like that
LOL
It's amazing that the poem is composed by someone who know how our Weasel is, as if he's been looking the SYM...
Has he!?
Could he be anyone in the SYM... or even in GB...
Not Buck, is it?
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:32 pm
by Georgi
Originally posted by Minerva
Not Buck, is it?
Did you just accuse Buck of being Weasel?
*sees Buck's finger hovering over the "Meltdown Minerva's Computer" button*
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:35 pm
by Minerva
No, I meant Buck is the man who wrote the poem.
You see, he captured the character of weasel really well in the poem...
Posted: Wed May 15, 2002 6:41 pm
by Georgi
Originally posted by Minerva
No, I meant Buck is the man who wrote the poem. You see, he captured the character of weasel really well in the poem...
Oh sure, backtracking now...
But the poem doesn't capture the character of Weasel... it says Weasel prevents spam!!!
Posted: Thu May 16, 2002 1:48 am
by Ode to a Grasshopper
Re: Re: Spam email filtering, great poetry, and marketing
Originally posted by Georgi
Evidently none. The proof? The software claims to prevent spam... it can't be anything to do with Weasel.
Yes, it
claims to prevent spam, but you'll note we have no proof that that is in fact what it does.
Hmm, purple beer. We don't serve that one yet...Hmm.