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This is a humouros post, it bears no strategic examination.. If your looking for cheese or strats, youl have to look elswheres,

Here is a list ive managed to compile of warped d&d spell names..

I wonder if anyone can add too it..

AD&D Spells Not Worth Memorizing

Yearning Hands (Gets preists and paladins into a lot of trouble)
Melfs Acid Trip
Animate Bread
Bigby's Obscene Finger
Bigby's Fondling grasp
Homicidal Stalker
Expensive Action
Delayed Blast Flatulence
Cause Critical Wind
Self Rightous magic (Anomens Favourite spell)
Smarm person
Detect Self
Protection from normal whistles
Detect sexual preference
Enlightening Bolt (Monks like this one)
Globe of Vulnerability
Guess Alignment
Magic Stoner
Prismatic hay
Symbol, None
Hold Bladder
Magic Miss all
Maggot Missle
Magic Gristle
Mildly Surprising Grasp
False Lawn
Summon Insect
Mistaken Identify
Mordenkainen's skateboard
Power Word, ANNOY
Protection from Self
Sleeping doom
Remove Clothes
RestErection
Raise Living
Silence of the Lambs, 15' radius
Limited Fish
Shadow hoar
Summon Telephone (Required composite for 'Call woodland beings')
Cone of icecream
Rice Storm

ha ha ha ha ha some of those are really funny like "hold bladder" and "detect self". lets see other spells not worth it

fire hall
conjure nerd element
finger of life
bolt of gory
misspell cast
meter swarm
wail of baby
time start
Absolute Vulnerability
pay raise
death log
chain fighting
spider stomp
protection from mold
bad luck
summon geese
minor rain
fat ray (makes target get fat)
bill touch
colored hay
burning sand
ghoul lunch
imprison self
forget traps
strength of none

Haha. Do you just come up with those, or have you seen them somewhere?

Several, like Melfs Acid trip.. Are really old classics since from way back when here are some more of the 'old classics'


Lice Storm
Bigby's Sucker Punch
Explosive Familiar (Duration: Instant)
Charm Dead (not undead)
Feign Invisibility
Rock to Stone
remove self
waif form
Mass manure
FirePaul (allows you to take away Pauls job)
Project spinach
Salt of Glory


Normal abilities...

wet hair
Get special chair
Harm animal
Learn undead
Play on sands
Quivering psalm

And some Hla's....

Glower attack
wet explosive crap
Tax evasion
Avoid life
A-fascination
Mass graze head
Aquire Elevenrental Tankformations

Those are all 'classics' so to speak...

Heres more O' the same...

Lentil Domination
Flem strike
Trade Barrier
Polymorph Shelf
Apechange
Improved Dental
Tensers resignation

Haha. Do you just come up with those, or have you seen them somewhere?

I did just come up with the ones that I posted earlier, lets see what new ones I can think of now.

spells not worth using on enemy's
level rain
hour of power
flesh to strength
stealers urge (makes them steal your money)

um...can't think of anything else

Originally posted by gnomethingy

Self Rightous magic (Anomens Favourite spell)

No Anomen bashing on my watch!

Hmm.. Of the top of my head...

Protection from Evil In-Laws
Shaking Grasp
Polymorph Annoying Brother
Victoria's Secret Word
Holy Cow


Eh, I'm out...

RAISE-E-RECTION (Shaggadalic baby!)
Bigby's whining *****
Summon evil demi-lich
Lunar dance
Solar dance
Mordenkainen's broom
Harm-heal-combo

Re: Re: Spells not worth memorizing

Originally posted by Aqua-chan




No Anomen bashing on my watch!

Hmm.. Of the top of my head...

Victoria's Secret Word

Eh, I'm out...

HI-Larios

Summon Bore
Cure Light Itch
Larloch's Minor Pain
Shocked Gasp
Resist Alcohol
Stinking Hound
Hold Dead
Invisibility 10" Radius
Monster Summoning 0
Melf's Mild Meteors
Protection from Motionless Missiles (Good for a clumsy archer )
Skull Whack
Otiluke's Resilient Dot
Animate Bed
Chain Lighting
Death Frog
Improved Waste
Protection From Magnetic Weapons
Summon YourShoe
Abi-Dalzim's Wonderful Rehydration
Improved Candle

LOL Let me take a stab at this.

HLA abilities not worth getting:

Critical Spite
Power Tacks
Resist Tatics
Aura of Flaming Breath
Mass Raise Bread
Summon Diva (summons opera singer)
Mental Transformation
Globe of Maids
Greater Invasion

and then there is summon cow...no joke on names, this is a real spell, the joke is watching poor old betsy kamikazi nosedive on a chambion....

incredibly funny...for a cheap laugh, create item "scrlzz" and have a mage load up on the spell and try it on a nasty....

sometimes, holstine bombing.....

Tax Evasion????
Remove Clothes????

Please, teach me!!!!

Originally posted by Littiz
Tax Evasion????
Remove Clothes????

Please, teach me!!!!

HLA's for the 'Opertunist' Rogue


Tax Evasion
Greater Tax evasion
Avoid Debt

Beware the counter spell though, 'Audit'

Detect Weevil
Improved Waste

...and these!

*bump* it will not end like this!


detect evil knievel
prime shop
ruby ray does rehearsal
PEEKABOO! (for no apparant reason )

OK, here's a few more:

Remove Deer
Holy Bite
Frigid Drinking
Nearsight
Breath Ward
Shield of the Acorns
Unholy Bird

Know Assignment
Ray of Embezzlement
Waste
Secret Nerd
Spirit Farmer
Symbol of Fun
Gates (summons the founder of Microsoft )