To use your example, I would analyse it like this:
[QUOTE=Ekental]
On one side of the spectrum you have a response that may follow:
Love is the spiritual connection between two people who care deeply for each other... etc.
On the other side of the specturm you may have:
Love is a complex set of chemical triggers in the brain that exhumes a desire to take care of another... etc.
[/QUOTE]
Love is a phenomena that is precisely defined, and can be both subjectively experiences and observed objectively according to a coherent structure of definitions. Thus, I conclude that as a phenomena, it exists. (Contrary to a god, a magical unicorn or ESP, which all can be precisely defined and subjectively experienced by an individuals, but it lacks
inter-observer reliability, ie those who experience it do not experience the same things, and also, not everybody experience it, only a few. Furthermore, they cannot be objectively observed (ie registrered by instruments, observed by individuals regardless of their personal beliefs etc) )
So, love exists. What is love? You can approach the question from two different perspectives of knowledge: subjective and objective. In theory of science, pain is often used as an example of this. Who knows more about back pain, the patient who has a chronic back pain disease, or the orthopedian who has never experienced pain but know all about pain as a phenomena (cause, mechanism, treatment)? Who knows most about love, the loving individual or the psychologist who is an expert on human emotions and behaviour, but has never loved anyone?
I would say these are two different types of knowledge, and it's impossible to say
who know the most since they cover distincly different aspects, but personally, I would say the orthopedian and the psychologist know more about pain/love respectively, because their knowledge is objective. Objective knowledge is more useful than subjective knowledge, since objective knowledge must be possible to generalise by definition, whereas subjective knowledge is limited to the subject who has the experience.
Subjective experience can vary in very inconsistent ways, who is to say your back pain feels the same as my back pain, and that our respective experience of pain has the same or even a similar meaning to us? It is simply not very useful knowledge to anyone else than ourselves. Only objective knowledge grants us to make knowledge generally useful, thus objective knowledge is far more valuable to me than subjective knowledge. My subjective knowledge is only valuable for me personally, as a private person.
So
what is love? Love is an emotion with has been selected for during evolution, due to it's survival value for the species. Love is a subgroup of what psychologists call
attachment, a bond between individuals that makes it pleasurable for them to stick together and thus also inclined to collaborate and work for each other. The most obvious examples are parental love and sexual love, both necessary for reproduction and survival of the offspring.
So much for cause. We love because it is evolutionary adaptive. Now, to the
mechanism: love, like all emotions, is an interactive biochemical event. Current research shows that we humans are very dependent on smell when we choose partners. Both parental and sexual bonds are dependent of release of a hormone called
oxytocin, which elicits certain experiences in us, such as a a sense of relaxation and well being, and it also degrades stree hormones such as cortisol. Oxytocin is released after orgasm in both men and women, and it is also released adult men andn women have physical contact with babies, regardless whether they are our biological children or not. Little is known about the biochemical mechanisms of love, it is a complex system, but ut us certainly a biochemical system.
Ok, the mechanisms that mediate love are biochemical. As for subjective experience, the experience part of an emotion is actually not so important
per se, the important thing is that it acts as a drive, a motivational force that makes us act in specific ways. Then of course, I personally think love and being in love is a great experience I really enjoy, but that's only important for my private life. To me, it feels like a deeply personal and private connection between me and my loved one - nice
Why do I not believe this deep connection is "spiritual"? Simply because there are no objective evidence that anything spiritual exists.