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Spammers Unanimous
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:25 pm
by Damuna_Nova
Do you have a spamming problem? Have you become so addicted that you neglect work, schoolwork or family life? Do you find that you are spending less time than usual with your friends due to a need to spam?
Then Spammers Unanimous is for you! In many not-so-easy steps we'll cure your spamming addiction and turn you back into that perfect society figure.*
There's no need to feel ashamed! We're all spammers here, and we're working to help cure ourselves and others.**
Simply give us your soul and we'll help you every step of the way!*** There's no need to fear! We have qualified professionals to help you get better!****
So sign up today, and you can live a happier life, free from spam!*****
* Spammers Unanimous is not responsible if you fail to reform.
** Spammers Unanimous is not responsible for inaccuracy of survey results.
*** Soul is non-refundable.
**** According to the Spammers Guide of 1476.
***** This is not a guarantee.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:33 pm
by Ravager
Hmm...I already sold my sould before though...can I give you a slip of paper saying 'IOU a soul'?
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:35 pm
by Damuna_Nova
Yes.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:37 pm
by ch85us2001
Uhm . . . Its Anonymous . . .
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:38 pm
by Ravager
Nice.
So, what do I have to do now?
@Chu, maybe it's a variation...
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:39 pm
by ch85us2001
Hello, My name is Chu, and I am a compulsive semileaver.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:40 pm
by Damuna_Nova
[QUOTE=ch85us2001]Hello, My name is Chu, and I am a compulsive semileaver.[/QUOTE]
:laugh:
I mean...that is tragic, we will do all we can to help you.
There's just one thing first...
*Passes soul jar*
We'll start treatment once you fill this.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:41 pm
by Phreddie
Hi, my name is Phreddie, and I am lacking underpants, a soul, and a plan for the progression to Phase 3.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:42 pm
by ch85us2001
*urinates in Soul Jar*
Do you want it filled to the top?
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:43 pm
by Ravager
@Nano, you're not supposed to laugh at the patients!
Hi all...I'm Ravager, compulsive uber-poster.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:44 pm
by Magrus
Ha, this looks so weird. Rav's the only poster in this thread that I can read his posts. :laugh:
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:44 pm
by ch85us2001
Hi, he's ravager, and he's about to pass one of the earliest members in post count.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:44 pm
by Damuna_Nova
[QUOTE=Phreddie]Hi, my name is Phreddie, and I am lacking underpants, a soul, and a plan for the progression to Phase 3.[/QUOTE]
Very well, please fill out this form.
*Hands a form*
And Chu...
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:45 pm
by ch85us2001
[QUOTE=Magrus]Ha, this looks so weird. Rav's the only poster in this thread that I can read his posts. :laugh:[/QUOTE]
If you can't see me then . . .
*urinates in Mag's vodka*
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:45 pm
by Ravager
[QUOTE=Magrus]Ha, this looks so weird. Rav's the only poster in this thread that I can read his posts. :laugh:[/QUOTE]
Haha. Nice.
And you're even ignoring Chu?
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:46 pm
by Magrus
*napalms Chu's dragster*
@ Rav, Indeed.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:46 pm
by Phreddie
*Fills out form*
*Looks at form, throws away McDonalds tic tac toe matt.*
Can I get real form?
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:47 pm
by ch85us2001
*throws soul jar carelessly over shoulder*
*sees Magrus' Destruction, cries, runs*
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:49 pm
by Damuna_Nova
[QUOTE=Phreddie]*Fills out form*
*Looks at form, throws away McDonalds tic tac toe matt.*
Can I get real form?[/QUOTE]
Sorry, the spammers tend to also be pathological kleptomaniacs.
Posted: Thu May 25, 2006 4:50 pm
by Ravager
[QUOTE=ch85us2001]*sees Magrus' Destruction, cries, runs*[/QUOTE]
I think he'd be aware of his own destruction, you know...