Do you ask for directions? (spam on subject)

[fable]

I do. I'm told that "men don't ask for directions," but as it's usually sneering women bearing large weapons who tell me this, I suspect their information is false. I don't see why someone in need of directions wouldn't ask, because it's the quickest way to find what you want. And that's what counts. I do it all the time, as needed.

My wife, on the other hand, won't ask for directions. This is easy to get around in a store, because we'll separate while looking for something, and I'll ask for directions, find what we need, and present it to her. If she's driving, on the other hand, may the gods take pity on us both, for she will travel anywhere up to an hour or more after acknowledging she's lost, before being willing to stop and ask directions. Or allow me to do so, which lets her off the hook.

So what about you? Do you ask for directions? Do you think not doing so is a male thing? If so, are you a sneering woman who carries around large weapons?

[dragon wench]

So can I safely conclude this poll is basically directed at the men here? (j/k )

A comment though, sadly my SO and I fit into the stereotype. I don't mind asking for directions, it's just so much more efficient, the SO on the other hand has to be dragged kicking and screaming before he'll concede defeat in finding somewhere/something.
It gets worse though, if we are driving somewhere and he's behind the wheel, he'll ask *me* to get directions.
I will always flatly refuse, beyond the fact that it rankles me, it makes far more sense for the person doing the driving to be asking how to reach said destination.
Funnily enough...he has long harboured a desire to install a GPS into the car...


Also, just about every male I have ever encountered falls into this stereotype, even those who are generally more enlightened about such matters.
*shrugs* I'm not saying, obviously, that it *is* a guy thing, but personal experience has resulted in my being shocked beyond belief when any guy I'm with is not bothered at having to ask directions.

[Dottie]

I do ask for directions, and generally ask for other things I need as well, as long as I believe I'm able to understand the answer. I also absolutely hate asking things for another person though, as it always end up with complete confusion.

To be honest I've never noticed that any person except those sociophobic are reluctant to ask directions.

[VonDondu]

My feelings are similar to Dottie's. ("I also absolutely hate asking things for another person though, as it always end up with complete confusion.")

I ask for directions sometimes, but only when I really need them, mostly because I lack faith in other people's ability to give me good directions. I know this might sound sexist of me, but I don't like asking women for directions because their way of thinking about directions always seems to be different from my own. I like to picture a map inside my head when I'm going somewhere, but most of the women I talk to have trouble with "right and left" and "north and south", etc., and they're always very puzzled when I ask abstract questions. For example, if they tell me the name of a certain street and I ask if it's the same street that intersects another street in another part of town that I'm familiar with, they'll misunderstand and say, "You don't want to go there; that's the wrong way." Asking them to draw a little map for me (which I would greatly prefer to verbal directions) is either pointless or absurd.

On a related note, I like to call ahead before I go anywhere to make sure that I don't waste my time. For example, plans can change if you're planning to meet someone, and if I'm going to a store to buy something, I like to make sure the item is in stock. Some people seem to think that everything will always turn out the way they expect it to, which is either wishful thinking, arrogance, or simply shortsightedness--which might be the same sorts of reasons why some people won't ask for directions. But again, the problem with "calling ahead" is that I have to talk to other people. Sometimes they cannot understand why I'm asking for confirmation, sometimes they give me incorrect information, and sometimes talking to them is just more frustrating than it's worth.

It's like that old "Beavis and Butt-Head" cartoon. A man walks into a fast food restaurant where Beavis and Butt-Head work, and he asks them if they use real ice cream in their milkshakes or if they use "that shake mix stuff". Beavis is completely incoherent, and Butt-Head replies, "Uh, we have chocolate, strawberry, and vanilla." You have to be prepared for answers like that if you ever dare to ask other people any questions.

[Claudius]

I would ask for directions but sometimes it takes me awhile to get in touch with reality that I am actually lost. For instance I might be optimistic that the road which I have no idea what it is is going to somehow turn into the one that I am looking for.

But I've definitely asked for directions when I realize I am lost.

Edit: ooh I see I am 6 posts away from 1000. Time to get into another heated discussion...Hmmm politics or religion; that is the question.

[Lady Dragonfly]

I am directionally challenged. I never know whether I am driving north or south while traversing the perilous uncharted worlds surrounding my place of residence. Only somebody with a death wish would want me as their navigator. For me, asking for directions is not optional; it is vital. However, I've learned (the hard way, as usual) that asking a gas station attendant or a fast food joint employee for directions is the best way to end up lost in time and space. These individuals prefer to use obscure hand gestures and geographical terminology I've never heard of. No idea what's wrong with these people. Must be fast food.

Anyway, when we travel, my husband does all the driving. Usually we use Mapquest or GPS. Sometimes he asks for directions (only as a last resort, see above).

[Dottie]

I ask for directions sometimes, but only when I really need them, mostly because I lack faith in other people's ability to give me good directions.

I must apologize for contributing to a society devoid of communication. Whenever someone asks me for directions I always end up giving totally incorrect answers. It doesn't matter if they ask the way to something that I know the exact location of, and on a road that I walk daily, I will still end up forgetting important parts of the route. If I could have 10 minutes to think about the question in solitude, and then draw a map it might be a bit more accurate, but that might make the whole exercise rather pointless.

[DesR85]

Asking for directions? Yes, especially when I'm lost or if I'm going to a destination I'm not familiar with.

[dragon wench]

I must apologize for contributing to a society devoid of communication. Whenever someone asks me for directions I always end up giving totally incorrect answers. It doesn't matter if they ask the way to something that I know the exact location of, and on a road that I walk daily, I will still end up forgetting important parts of the route. If I could have 10 minutes to think about the question in solitude, and then draw a map it might be a bit more accurate, but that might make the whole exercise rather pointless.

Actually... I'm somewhat similar...
Not only do I have the tendency to be directionally challenged, but if somebody asks me for directions, even if it is a location I know well, I have to stop and think hard about it. Usually I will offer to sketch them out a quick map (I generally have pen and paper on me), and that helps me focus and usually ensures I don't miss anything important. Without sketching the map out though..... I'm a bit unreliable.
They think I'm going out of my way to be extra helpful... Little do they know....

[Tricky]

Never have, but I do consult the Google a lot these days. Collective memory is a many nifty thing. One senior may not remember where the loo is, but an entire elderly house can guide you through Naples. Elderlies chatting.

[Maharlika]

Sometimes.

Mostly as a last resort. And if I do, I usually ask someone I think knows the area well (not just any random person).

Although personally I don't see any big deal if I do need to ask someone else.

[Lady Dragonfly]

If I may ask a question... without inciting a nuclear war...

Fable, are you allowed to drive your family sedan?

And I also wonder if size D would qualify as "large weapons"...

[fable]

To quote from my initial post, above:

If she's driving, on the other hand, may the gods take pity on us both, for she will travel anywhere up to an hour or more after acknowledging she's lost, before being willing to stop and ask directions. Or allow me to do so, which lets her off the hook.

I actually do a fair amount of driving, and the "allow me" was meant ironically, in a tone similar to the godly invocation employed above it.

Your point?

[Lady Dragonfly]

I assumed "allow me to do so" = "allow me to ask".

[fable]

I assumed "allow me to do so" = "allow me to ask".

Nah. I'll ask, given a chance, but when she's driving, we obviously don't pull over for me to get a chance. Until we've been on the road enough for her to prove something.

So is this, do you think, often a sexual=cultural training thing? Pardon my use of technical terms.

[Lady Dragonfly]

So is this, do you think, often a sexual=cultural training thing? Pardon my use of technical terms.

Perhaps. Modern women often make a mistake when they try to dominate their partners behind the wheel and everywhere else. "Anything you can do, I can do better" might be a true statement, but is it really wise to shove it down his throat all the time? Pardon my use of technical terms.

Feminists lack subtlety.

[dragon wench]

I also think there might be a certain sexual/cultural programming thing.

Speaking for myself, and I'm an "equalist," not a feminist, I admit to sometimes reacting against traditional expectations. Even something as minor as clothing... I mean, for the longest time I categorically refused to wear pink in any shape or form. Silly.. but... hey..

So, I can certainly see how women who won't ask for directions might be somewhat driven (no pun intended ) by a desire to directly counter cultural stereotyping.

[fable]

So, I can certainly see how women who won't ask for directions might be somewhat driven (no pun intended ) by a desire to directly counter cultural stereotyping.

It might be a matter of my wife's heritage. Her father is a very stubborn man who never asks for directions, and she was the eldest child. But then, that side of her family is all like that, males and females. I think if they were all on a bus together and nobody knew the directions to a restaurant, they'd arrive a long time after it closed.

[Bloodstalker]

I ask directions if I need to. If I didn't, I'd never get anywhere. I do not, however, freely provide directions to anyone who asks. I require a trade, and will make them give me directions to somewhere they know how to get to in return.

I use Yahoo directions as well, but trust them less after they told me to get off the interstate and right back on it five times on the way to Cincinnati. I-75 is I-75 in my opinion, and getting off and on it won;t make it shorter.

[fable]

I ask directions if I need to. If I didn't, I'd never get anywhere. I do not, however, freely provide directions to anyone who asks. I require a trade, and will make them give me directions to somewhere they know how to get to in return.

Intersting. I tend to hang back on giving directions, too, but my wife will gladly give extensive directions to anybody, provided she knows where they want to go. And she's extremely good with a map. Not much inner sense of direction. I've got that, but I'm really not very good with maps. So we complement one another.