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Men and Women Of Chemistry

Anything goes... just keep it clean.
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Vehemence
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Men and Women Of Chemistry

Post by Vehemence »

Men and Women Of Chemistry

Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there!)

Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if not used well.

Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity to gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.

Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Element Name: MAN
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50)

Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Kd (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.

Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command.

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
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Georgi
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Post by Georgi »

LMAO :D :D :D
Who, me?!?
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Carbonyl
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Post by Carbonyl »

:D :D :D :D LOL

WO
Density- <XY
Hardness- N/A
Tensile Strength- Depends on the day within the month
Modulus of Elasticity-0- totally unwilling to comprimise
Heat Capacity- Very short. Use with caution
Heat of Fusion- Add uncommuicative XY
Thermal Conductivity- Very low, keep under constant room temp 78F and carry around multiple changes of clothing while travleing.
Melting Point-Happens after meeting and subsequint breakup from the "rebel" type XY
Emissivity- Only on bright days
Electrical Resistivity- Woman are immune to elctricity
Critical Superconducting Temperature 77F
Damn I good lookin'. My mother told me so.
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Darkpoet
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Post by Darkpoet »

XY is also known to have partial hearing, with prolonged Television watching. Has tendency to say yes, at doing things. Can close out high whiney voices. :D :D

Then there is the "huh, what did you say?" :D
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Gwalchmai
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Post by Gwalchmai »

Originally posted by Vehemence:
<STRONG>Element Name: MAN
Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command.
</STRONG>
This is the process of changing from a solid directly to a gas, which I, personally, find quite sublime. :D :rolleyes:

(Where's Waverly when you need someone to get a really bad pun? ;) )
That there; exactly the kinda diversion we coulda used.
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Aegis
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Post by Aegis »

XY is also known to consume mass amounts of potatoe like substance, and fried pork while ignoreing WO
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