Advantages of a Halfing against an Elf

Astafas · Post by **Astafas** » Wed May 08, 2002 5:20 am

Originally posted by Ode to a Grasshopper
Elves could wear velvet socks, that would be cool, you've got to admit.

Well, since I have to admit, I might as well do so before you add any details to this question...

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed May 08, 2002 6:14 am

Halflings, prepared with an orange sauce over a slow fire, are far superior to elves.

Ode to a Grasshopper · Wed May 08, 2002 6:38 am

Originally posted by fable
Halflings, prepared with an orange sauce over a slow fire, are far superior to elves.

But they're just too fat, far too much cholesterol. Elves are good lean meat, and only 4 and 1/2 points on the Jenny Craig weight loss points guide. Halflings, in contrast, have the same amount of meat, but are a whopping 8 points, which is about 40% of your daily points allowance.

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed May 08, 2002 6:49 am

Originally posted by Ode to a Grasshopper
But they're just too fat, far too much cholesterol. Elves are good lean meat, and only 4 and 1/2 points on the Jenny Craig weight loss points guide. Halflings, in contrast, have the same amount of meat, but are a whopping 8 points, which is about 40% of your daily points allowance.

You're thinking in terms of pan roasting or (worse yet) frying. No, I'm referring to spit roasting, which removes the fat easily.

As for elves: too many small bones, even if the skin is delicate.

Rattman · Post by **Rattman** » Wed May 08, 2002 6:58 am

Halflings, prepared with an orange sauce over a slow fire, are far superior to elves

however if you gut an elf and stuff it with (dryad) acorns and goodberrys it is much better than the halfling but not nearly as much meat

Astafas · Post by **Astafas** » Wed May 08, 2002 7:16 am

Oh my, what have I started!?

At least we have a moderator spamming with us...

Rattman · Post by **Rattman** » Wed May 08, 2002 7:18 am

moderator spamming with us

i thought spam had ham in it not elf's and halflings

Ode to a Grasshopper · Wed May 08, 2002 7:22 am

Have you ever seen spam being produced in-factory?

Rattman · Post by **Rattman** » Wed May 08, 2002 7:24 am

no but i found it once

http://www.smalltime.com/findthespam.html

Ode to a Grasshopper · Wed May 08, 2002 8:30 am

Originally posted by fable

You're thinking in terms of pan roasting or (worse yet) frying. No, I'm referring to spit roasting, which removes the fat easily.

As for elves: too many small bones, even if the skin is delicate.

Yes, but if you spit roast them all the flavor is lost. And the elves' velvet socks are hard to get off over a spit-roast fire.

Halflings are more of a side dish.

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed May 08, 2002 8:54 am

I repent! I will cease to spam here, and keep my observations for SYM (Speak Your Mind).

Alternatively, I could move this thread over to SYM. As it's kinda silly anyway, what think you of that?

Astafas · Post by **Astafas** » Wed May 08, 2002 9:09 am

Originally posted by fable
I repent! I will cease to spam here, and keep my observations for SYM (Speak Your Mind).

Alternatively, I could move this thread over to SYM. As it's kinda silly anyway, what think you of that?

He he, no objections from me - let's move over to the silly threads!

Arcane · Post by **Arcane** » Wed May 08, 2002 11:11 am

lompo said something about using a shield, sword and sling instead. what are the advantages of using these (besides the AC) over two swords?

GNGSpam · Post by **GNGSpam** » Wed May 08, 2002 12:21 pm

Well you have the weigh the advantages of a second swords benefits and the extra attack per round verses the benefits of a shield. There are some very nice shields which give you very good bonuses even on top of the AC bonus. However, most people prefer the extra attack and advantages a second weapon can provide (especially dualing whatever alongside Crom which gives you 25 strength, a big bonus)

But, if you go two weapons, you cant have a sling ready'ed (sling/sword wont work).

SO

If you have low hit points and plan on hitting and running, id recommend sword/sling and shield. Viconia isa perfect example of this. Her low hit points make it silly to try and keep her on the frontlines. Give her a shield and sling though and her ridiculously low AC can protect her fairly well and she can contribute with the sling.

On the flip side, if you plan on tanking yourself, wading in and fighting, take the extra weapon and concentrate on killing everything super fast. Though your AC wont be as low, itll still be plenty low enough and you should have the hit points to make it out ok.

PS A note, the big bad dudes. Dragons and such. They dont care about AC. Its kind of pointless against them. Killing them quickly should DEFINANTLY take priority.

Phantom Lord · Post by **Phantom Lord** » Wed May 08, 2002 1:33 pm

Two weapons of course. Mask and Blackrazor are a fine combo for evil halflings, Mask and Cutthroat for neutral and good ones (... waits for someone to warn about level drain death destroying loot ...).

Btw, a fighter / thief with a shield would look pretty silly ... "wait, I just have to put that bloody shield on the ground before I pick that lock ... <clong!> ... damn!"

GNGSpam · Post by **GNGSpam** » Wed May 08, 2002 1:51 pm

As opposed to the fighter/thief with 4 weapons (3 quickslots and an offhand) in easy reach? Where would you find room to put all of those swords....

UserUnfriendly · Post by **UserUnfriendly** » Wed May 08, 2002 3:14 pm

well, as the biggest two handed weapon advacate on the boards, the quick switch from holy avenger to frag grenade loaded and dripping (like halfling fat on spit)with g deathblow, try two ahnded...the damage under g whirwind is amazing...and so satisfying to hear the enemies crunch and frag...

but after getting the acid katana, kinda hard to resist...

but seriously, after the underdark, dual wielding is a pain in the but, since you have to unequipp ring of free action, and reequipp after impr haste...

you guys are keeping hte ring, right???immunity to stun, and more than once found charm markers and chaos markers in icon, but still had control...better than any other immunity itme in game....

Bruce Lee · Post by **Bruce Lee** » Wed May 08, 2002 3:25 pm

Originally posted by UncleScratchy

Personally I don't care much for elves - odious little buggers they are. Halflings are better, but gnomes rule (just ask any one of them). I think I'll try an all gnomish party with Jan as the only NPC and the rest of my own creation - it'll have to include myself (Uncle Scrathy) of course, and the ever awesome Aunt Petunia (slayer of Jon), maybe Burt Wunderkind, and Cousins Belar and Josey (the one that married that stupid gully dwarf).

As Jan says: "Well they’re not gnomes, but they’re not a total loss either. Some of them can get through an entire battle without my needing to baby-sit them. Quite remarkable for the non-gnomish. Where’s your elephant?

You could pick up good old Tiax in Spellhold!!

ThorinOakensfield · Post by **ThorinOakensfield** » Wed May 08, 2002 8:29 pm

Elves are wussies. They hate all non-elves and all non-elves hate them. Mutual hate.

Halfings are far cooler, and they know how to make a good kobold pie.

Now if you want to go into a creature that really sucks, then we got the kobold.

Ode to a Grasshopper · Wed May 08, 2002 11:45 pm

@Fable-You can move this thread into SYM if you want, but it would be sort of cool to have one silly thread in the BG2 forum, just to see if we can finally top the old Dwarven Thrower thread. Do what you think best, your judgement has been reliable thus far.

@Thorin-Elves don't hate all other races, they just know that they're better than all the other races. Even half-humans, who by the way are a terrible drain on the welfare system in Suldanesselar. Would even a halfling hang around with a kobold, if it knew it was better than them?

BTW, honey and kobold pie go absolutely terrible together, so having a creature who makes honey and pie at the same time is a bit pointless really.

As for the gnome-fans, you're all just being silly. As if gnomes could compare to elves.