Take it standing (pub)

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 4:35 pm

We have had numerous pubs here at sym, but I figured that for my 2K post I would introduce something with a twist.

We specialize in exotic ales brewed directly on the premises......pumpkin ale, espresso stout and honey ales and lagers....to name a few

Oh....and there are some decent vintages for those of you who prefer the blessed and holy grape.

And we feature entertainment...specifically stand up comedy....those of you able to stand up and show off your considerable talents at humour and comic relief....will be awarded a free pint (in a real pint mug...

) courtesy of the house.......
.......so cheers, and enjoy !

*hoists a pitcher and yells bar is open and ready to serve*

crazymancometh · Post by **crazymancometh** » Mon May 13, 2002 4:49 pm

Well lookee here lookee here.!!!!!! my comedy is know universal !!! So set me up a pint of that pumpkin ale !!!! As you can tell Orange is my favorite color !!!! Now may i write jokes or not???

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 4:52 pm

Originally posted by crazymancometh
Well lookee here lookee here.!!!!!! my comedy is know universal !!! So set me up a pint of that pumpkin ale !!!! As you can tell Orange is my favorite color !!!! Now may i write jokes or not???

Indeed you may....just as long as they are reasonably respectful

I don't want my fine establishment closed down

*passes crazy man a pint of pumpkin ale*

crazymancometh · Post by **crazymancometh** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:02 pm

Cinderella was now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the
now dead Prince, she happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching
the world go by from her front porch, with a cat called Alan for
companionship.

One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother.

Cinderella said "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all
these years?"

The Fairy Godmother replied "Well Cinderella, since you have lived a
good, wholesome life since we last met, I have decided to grant you
3 wishes. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"

Cinderella is taken aback, overjoyed and after some thoughtful
consideration and almost under her breath she uttered her first
wish: "I wish I was wealthy beyond comprehension."

Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold. Cinderella
was stunned. Alan, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap and
scampered to the edge of the porch, quivering with fear.

Cinderella said "Oh thank you, Fairy Godmother".

The Fairy Godmother replied "It is the least I can do. What does
your heart wish for your second wish?"

Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said: "I wish I was
young and full of the beauty of youth again".

>At once, her wish having been desired, became reality, and her
beautiful youthful visage had returned. Cinderella felt stirrings
inside her that had been dormant for years and long forgotten vigor
and vitality began to course through her very soul.

Then the Fairy Godmother again spoke "You have one more wish, what
shall you have?"

Cinderella looked over to the frightened cat in the corner and said:
"I wish you to transform Alan my old cat into a beautiful and
handsome young man".

Magically, Alan suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his
biological make-up, that when complete he stood before her, a boy,
so beautiful the like of which she nor the world had ever seen, so
fair indeed that birds begun to fall from the sky at his feet.

The Fairy Godmother again spoke: "Congratulations, Cinderella. Enjoy
your new life." And, with a blazing shock of bright blue
electricity, she was gone.

For a few eerie moments, Alan and Cinderella looked into each
other's eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most
stunningly perfect boy she had ever seen.

Then Alan walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her
rocking chair, and held her close in his young muscular arms.

He leant in close to her ear, and into her ear breathed as much as
whispered, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath, "I bet you
regret having me neutered now, don't you?

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:04 pm

"Orange ya glad I didn't say banana?" hoo hoo! Oh, I'm such a card!

My daughter's favourite joke right now:
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!

Pass me some o' that Pumpkin Ale, Wench! *Gwally prepares for the visions to come*

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:11 pm

@ Crazy Man lmao

lol @ Gwally
* passes him a foaming mug of pumpkin ale. Beads of condensation form on the chilled exterior....and delicate hints of pumpkin, cloves, allspice and cinnamon drift upwards upwards*

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:15 pm

*Gwally takes a deep draught*

Erm, is that Thantor over there in a thong?

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:19 pm

Originally posted by Gwalchmai
*Gwally takes a deep draught*

Erm, is that Thantor over there in a thong?

*eek* That would be a rather liberal interpretation of comedy !

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:25 pm

posted by DW
*eek* That would be a rather liberal interpretation of comedy !

I understand that he is a liberated sort of guy - and in that thong, he appears to be very liberated!

Of course, now I’m being libelous.

Perhaps I need more libations?

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:29 pm

Originally posted by Gwalchmai

I understand that he is a liberated sort of guy - and in that thong, he appears to be very liberated!

Of course, now I’m being libelous.

Perhaps I need more libations?

lmao

*passes Gwally another pint of ale*

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:37 pm

*chug*
*smacks his lips*
Ahhhhh!

Ned Flanders · Post by **Ned Flanders** » Mon May 13, 2002 5:54 pm

Perhaps I'll try the comedy thing later. Right now, I'll pay for my beer because I'm rich.

Oh wait, that is funny

Witch King · Post by **Witch King** » Mon May 13, 2002 6:08 pm

:looks for T'lainya, ready to end her wait to "take it standing"

: peers about :

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Mon May 13, 2002 6:33 pm

Lurking again Foul

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 6:37 pm

lol! *hands out mugs of ale to those recently arrived*

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Mon May 13, 2002 6:40 pm

Thank you DW

Darn cable keeps cutting out today

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 7:09 pm

you are welcome T'L

I must be lucky, I very rarely have trouble with my cable, although...invariably, if it chooses to cut out on me it is inevitably at the most inconvenient moment possible....

*swallows down more ale in an effort to forget such woes*

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Mon May 13, 2002 7:11 pm

MInes been a pain allday, I'll get online browse a little while and down it goes

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Mon May 13, 2002 7:13 pm

wonder if it is related to mother's day...I could not use my @home email account all day yesterday,....but seeing as I was hanging out on the beach this was not too serious a problem

it actually got to 21*C (um... I think that is 70 or 71* F)

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Mon May 13, 2002 7:20 pm

LMAO, the cable tv was out too so they were probably working on it somewhere.
LOL those are winter temperatures here