Advantages of a Halfing against an Elf

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Fri May 10, 2002 10:46 am

Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by Ode to a Grasshopper
SYM has it's fair share of funny looking and odd people, 'tis true. Touche. Though you could be frequenting SYM for the intelligent conversation and deep, meaningful discourse that so often prevails there...

There's still the problem of the age difference with halflings and elves. A halfling partner would get old and die long before an elf would. And of course from an elven perspective having a partner with 18 Con is a bit of a waste, considering that they can only have 17. Why have a partner who can go the extra mile if he has to go it alone?

Wait...I thought we were purely looking at this selfishly from the woman's point of view?? You know, what can the halfling do for me, not what I can do for the halfling. Besides, this hypothetical halfling would be so overjoyed to have such a beautiful partner, he'd be doing hypothetically whatever he could to keep her.

Also, what if we factor in that I like to play Nymph's...are you saying a Nymph isn't allowed a nice halfling plaything just because she might live longer than him?

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Fri May 10, 2002 2:29 pm

Originally posted by UncleScratchy

Next I will attempt to create Burt Wunderkind's Baby Griffin figurine (usable only by gnomes - sorry Vivian).

Ah darn

I've always wanted a pet griffin... *sighs forlornly*

Arcane · Post by **Arcane** » Fri May 10, 2002 3:04 pm

Short Sword of Honey-

This ancient blade was once used by Yiddleson Krickhill, a well known halfling fighter/thief. This blade's enchantment causes the target to receive an effect similar to slow, hold him and sting him. Krickhill forged a rather sticky path through the Faerunian underworld with this blade, eventually getting entangled in the honey and suffocating to death.

damage:2d4

Ode to a Grasshopper · Sat May 11, 2002 1:05 am

Re: Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by Vivien

Wait...I thought we were purely looking at this selfishly from the woman's point of view?? You know, what can the halfling do for me, not what I can do for the halfling. Besides, this hypothetical halfling would be so overjoyed to have such a beautiful partner, he'd be doing hypothetically whatever he could to keep her.

Also, what if we factor in that I like to play Nymph's...are you saying a Nymph isn't allowed a nice halfling plaything just because she might live longer than him?

No we weren't, we were looking at it selfishly from an elf's point of view, because I'm not a woman so can't really comment on that side of things without ungergoing major surgery.

Why undergo thewaste and tedium of having to train halfling after halfling in the art of giving pleasure when a single elf could do just as well, with the added advantage that he/she would get more and more skilled with practice over time? Halflings would be old and wrinkly and gross before your average elf or nymph knew it, they'd just get wrapped up in a good book for a few decades then suddenly realize their latest plaything was a mouldy pile of bones.

Arcane · Post by **Arcane** » Sat May 11, 2002 1:30 am

the average halfing age is 0-122 i think (according to LoTR)

Ode to a Grasshopper · Sat May 11, 2002 2:02 am

Originally posted by Arcane
the average halfing age is 0-122 i think (according to LoTR)

Thanks for the info, I thought it was around 120 or so but I wasn't sure.

As elves can often live up to 900 years my point still stands.

Arcane · Post by **Arcane** » Sat May 11, 2002 4:42 am

heh
and by the time the halfing gets married to the elf, half his life would have worn away (like 50 or something)

DaringCommander11 · Post by **DaringCommander11** » Sat May 11, 2002 8:10 pm

Jansen Quotes

Scratchy is it possible for you to set up a link to download all of Jan's quotes you have gotten. Also I would like screenshots for the items you make and just your party standing around if possible (6 gnomes in weird equipment, i love it. I'll book them in Vegas).

Personnally I'm a big fan of Halflings over every race except humans (so i'm racist) but i've always felt gnomes had a great place in the party (specifically in the back taughnting griffions, eating turnips, using illusions to mess with enemies, telling hilarious stories, etc.)

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Mon May 13, 2002 9:54 am

Re: Re: Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by Ode to a Grasshopper
No we weren't, we were looking at it selfishly from an elf's point of view, because I'm not a woman so can't really comment on that side of things without ungergoing major surgery.

Why undergo thewaste and tedium of having to train halfling after halfling in the art of giving pleasure when a single elf could do just as well, with the added advantage that he/she would get more and more skilled with practice over time? Halflings would be old and wrinkly and gross before your average elf or nymph knew it, they'd just get wrapped up in a good book for a few decades then suddenly realize their latest plaything was a mouldy pile of bones.

Ah, Come on Ode, get in touch with your feminine side.

Train? Why would you assume that Haflings need to be trained? I would think it would be an inate skill, like Trolls and smelling bad...Dark Elves and spider fetishes...Paladins and rusty armor...

I mean, they've been given good con and dex for a reason, and I think I've summed up that reason pretty nicely.

Also, you assume that my elf would be looking for a long term relationship? When on earth did I say that? I think I have been pretty clear on the whole 'purely for physical pleasure' thing..why do men always try to complicate things with relationship talk??

UncleScratchy,
Thanks for the rose named after me!

*hug*

Astafas · Post by **Astafas** » Mon May 13, 2002 10:01 am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by Vivien
I think I have been pretty clear on the whole 'purely for physical pleasure' thing..why do men always try to complicate things with relationship talk??

Dearest Viv, when can we meet?

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Mon May 13, 2002 1:36 pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by UncleScratchy

No, I should be thanking you for the inspiration. I carry the rose in my quickslot right next to "Plooty's Cup of Healing" - it contains fortified turnip juice, heals 20 hps and cures disease. Great for recurring cases of the pox and is goes good with a nice meal of chicken or drow meat. Cheers!

Drow meat?

Astafas: *hug* We both know you live far away in Europe and that if I were to travel there I'd get lost...probably have to sell my clothing and possessions just to get an english speaking guide, and knowing me I'd get the kind of guide that leaves you stark naked in Russia in the winter with a 'kick me' sign taped to your back. (I plan on using the sign as clothing).

But, that explains why I don't travel.

*ahem* But, back on topic, I believe I've proven my point as to the superiority of the shorter folk in certain tasks?

UserUnfriendly · Post by **UserUnfriendly** » Mon May 13, 2002 1:58 pm

Did i mention i am five foot six???

ahem...

you are aware that crumpled newspaper and cardboard makes great thermal barriors??? like using nasa developed infra red reflectors...the so called space blanket, and while mobility may be restricted, if the sign is big and corrugated, you hsould be able to survive a russian winter wearing a big "kick me" sign...

i think its very enlightened how tashia and sola and kelsey can and will romance little people, elves are no longer the sex kittens of BG2...

Littiz · Post by **Littiz** » Tue May 14, 2002 3:20 am

I think I have been pretty clear on the whole 'purely for physical pleasure' thing..why do men always try to complicate things with relationship talk??

Do we?????
Am I born in the wrong corner of the world??!!!
Time to collect my few belongings and leave....

Arcane · Post by **Arcane** » Tue May 14, 2002 8:26 am

Originally posted by UserUnfriendly

i think its very enlightened how tashia and sola and kelsey can and will romance little people, elves are no longer the sex kittens of BG2...

WHY CANT I INSTALL TASHIA! does she romance dwarves?

when installing it says something like im missing a unix file

The Z · Post by **The Z** » Tue May 14, 2002 7:48 pm

Ahem....getting back on topic (only to probably go off topic again) halflings do make better pure thieves.

I have to say....this has gotta be the most diverse (trying to sound like an English major) group of people......

Ode to a Grasshopper · Tue May 14, 2002 10:59 pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Last post for the night, G'night all.

Originally posted by Vivien

Ah, Come on Ode, get in touch with your feminine side.

Train? Why would you assume that Haflings need to be trained? I would think it would be an inate skill, like Trolls and smelling bad...Dark Elves and spider fetishes...Paladins and rusty armor...

I mean, they've been given good con and dex for a reason, and I think I've summed up that reason pretty nicely.

Also, you assume that my elf would be looking for a long term relationship? When on earth did I say that? I think I have been pretty clear on the whole 'purely for physical pleasure' thing..why do men always try to complicate things with relationship talk??

UncleScratchy,
Thanks for the rose named after me! *hug*

You know I'd far sooner get in touch with your feminine side, @Viv.

No matter how good a halfling/elf's innate talents at the more intimate arts they can only get better over time, as they become more familiar with what works best for you. A halfling gets until 120 years old at best, hence making the need to continually show halfling after halfling what "does it best" for you. A fellow elf, on the other hand, just gets better and more experienced with time, saving you the bother of teaching all those halflings what works best. Hence it is not a "long-term-relationship" in the normal sense of the expression, but rather like when you have a favourite pair of shoes, which have been broken in to be just perfect. Anyone who has ever had to throw out an old, comfy pair of sneakers and break in an entirely new pair (complete with pinched toes) will understand what I mean.

As I mentioned before, having a pleasure-slave with 18 Con is a waste if the best you yourself can have is 17.

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Wed May 15, 2002 9:01 am

Originally posted by UserUnfriendly
Did i mention i am five foot six???

ahem...

you are aware that crumpled newspaper and cardboard makes great thermal barriors??? like using nasa developed infra red reflectors...the so called space blanket, and while mobility may be restricted, if the sign is big and corrugated, you hsould be able to survive a russian winter wearing a big "kick me" sign...

i think its very enlightened how tashia and sola and kelsey can and will romance little people, elves are no longer the sex kittens of BG2...

Rofl! Thanks to you're advice, I'll survive the winter! I think I'll start drinking Vodka too...I bet it warms one up nicely.

Well, you have to admit, Nymphs win hands down as sex kittens...they romp happily in the woods, are agelessly beautiful, want sex just for that moment of pleasure, and have all sorts of charm spells at their disposal...

But yes, little people beat elves

As to your height...yet another person taller than me? *going to have to start wearing high heals more*

Ode:
*hug* I'll invite you over for a slumber party. We can do each others hair and talk about what women REALLY want

I don't really agree with your argument, because you're still forcing me to stick with elves because they are long term and I'd have to keep training Halflings in as they grow old and die. *shrugs* Also, you're ignoring that my character finds halflings cuter than elves.

I thought I already mentioned that my character would be flitting from man to man...er halfling to halfling...not really staying in one place long enough to train one in..spending her summers frolicking with nymphs in the forests...spending her winters trying to teleport herself to Jamaica...

Littiz,
It's not that you're in the wrong part of the world...it's that everyone else is in the wrong state of mind.

The Z:
Yes, we're special.

Vivien · Post by **Vivien** » Wed May 15, 2002 9:49 am

Originally posted by UncleScratchy

It's not that we beat elves on purpose - its just, well, they have it coming. Now if it were, say a druid, then we would simply mock them. Since you like the small of stature, I think you might enjoy the game of "Fetch the Dwarf"?

Is that an actual game? Am I missing a play on words? Or, is it an SOA slang term that I don't know?

Astafas · Post by **Astafas** » Wed May 15, 2002 10:54 am

Originally posted by Vivien
Am I missing a play on words?

Please elaborate a bit on this one, darling Viv!

Littiz · Post by **Littiz** » Wed May 15, 2002 11:52 am

It's not that you're in the wrong part of the world...it's that everyone else is in the wrong state of mind.

I'm not sure I understand your meaning...
Here girls want the same things as in the rest of the world,
it's only that they CLAIM otherwise!
If you're referring to the fact that sometimes I seem TOO
good, this doesn't mean I don't know how to make happy
a girl!

REAL LIFE SPOILER
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I just have to ACT evil.