Famous last words in the D&D world

Raistlin · Post by **Raistlin** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 12:21 pm

Let's not limit this by only last words but let's include funny incidents .

Keep them coming ..

/-\lastor · Post by **/-\lastor** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 2:54 pm

For the funny moment here as 2 links:
http://www.dicetales.com
http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/ultimateb ... =000261;p=

Just completed reading both databases, took me a coupla weeks

Raistlin · Post by **Raistlin** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 8:21 pm

Originally posted by /-\lastor
For the funny moment here as 2 links:
http://www.dicetales.com
http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/ultimateb ... =000261;p=

Just completed reading both databases, took me a coupla weeks

Great links there -/ lastor ..

Bad Karma · Post by **Bad Karma** » Sat Jun 29, 2002 12:34 pm

Last words of a dumb mercenary: my sig

Trefor · Post by **Trefor** » Tue Jul 02, 2002 9:01 am

The scene:

A major combat with the party being overwhelmed by hordes of monsters.

Mega Damage fighter (the only remaining hope of the party) to wizard running out of spells):

"Haste me, Haste me"

Wizard casts spell, fighter fails system shock and drops dead of a heart attack.

Same player (in first AD&D several years earlier) to DM, "I'll lie on the altar."

All other players to DM "our characters back away"

DM to other players:"A black cloud covers the altar, you hear lots of wet ripping noises."

My paladin to Red Dragon (after having been abandoned by the rest of the party): "I challenge you to single combat"

Maharlika · Post by **Maharlika** » Thu Jul 11, 2002 9:38 pm

Bard to a floating white-dressed female...

...at a cemetery...

..."so, what's a cutie like you doing in a place like this?"

here's another:

"BAH! They all need a natural 20 to hit me..."

*Murphy's Law takes place...*

hiya · Post by **hiya** » Fri Jul 19, 2002 11:30 am

Here are some of the last words that i frequintly hear:

1. He doesnt look so tuff
2. Can i kick him in the junk?
3. CHARGE!!!!

thats all i can think of for now

Hesperus · Post by **Hesperus** » Fri Jul 19, 2002 12:58 pm

Playing ravenloft:

PC (red in the face), in a party with no clerics far from civilization: What do you mean I can't be raised after dying from the greater mummy's mummy rot??!! That's MY dust!

Craig · Post by **Craig** » Sat Jul 20, 2002 12:31 am

Wow that horned helmet just spoke to me!

Maharlika · Post by **Maharlika** » Wed Jul 24, 2002 3:05 am

In a swamp ready to set up camp...

...Archer: Look, a lump of rock in the water! I'll sit there to take up my post...

Galuf the Dwarf · Post by **Galuf the Dwarf** » Tue Mar 16, 2004 8:27 pm

Here's one of my own, inspired by a D&D/Forgotten Realms personality test that someone found. Anyways...

After a low-level party enters the lair of a great red dragon...

Wizard: *shuffling through his scroll container* Hey, where's my scroll of Slay Dragon?

*the dragon descends upon them like the gale from a full-force hurricane*

Rob-hin · Post by **Rob-hin** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 2:56 pm

Good one.

I've got one too, the character lived to fight another day though.

A gang of adventurers find a wall which summons some kind of uber-evil aberation when someone touches the wall one way or another.

Ranger: I feel the suface
DM: As you touch the wall, you feel a strange vibe.
*Aberation appears through the wall*

The players kill it in a fight, but the ranger is really pissed of.
Ranger: I am angry, so I take a leak against the wall.
*Aberation appears through the wall*

Another fight, character manage to kill this one too, but are heavily wounded.

Ranger: I am even more angry now. *fires an arrow against the wall*
*Aberation appears through the wall swoops down to the ranger and flies off to eat him*

Luckely for the ranger, the rest managed to save him.

Rudar Dimble · Post by **Rudar Dimble** » Wed Mar 17, 2004 5:26 pm

hmm....sounds familiar

boo's daddy · Post by **boo's daddy** » Thu Mar 18, 2004 4:39 am

Said by Druid character as he sets about torching a forest or wantonly slaughtering animals or something:

"but I do it extremely Druidically"

Rob-hin · Post by **Rob-hin** » Thu Mar 18, 2004 9:07 am

Is that even a word?

boo's daddy · Post by **boo's daddy** » Fri Mar 19, 2004 6:21 am

heh, it's a living language

That DM was a stickler for alignment (quite rightly, of course) and once dumped a cleric down a level and made him do penance for pulling the legs off a daddy long-legs (mayfly).

Other famous last words:

"Where's that dwarven assassin got to?"
* RIP SLICE BURST *

Mr-Lucian · Post by **Mr-Lucian** » Wed Mar 24, 2004 10:59 am

Here are some great quotes:

DM (to Monk who is very close to neutral): Your alignment changes to neutral
Monk: F***, I find a Monk and I punch him.

Famous last words

Grunge(a high level thief): Wow…a whole wall of golden scales…I take one.
DM: No you don't

Wizard to thief: Don't worry, I'm sure I can True Resurrect you.
Thief: I take the crown.

Kender (in Asia): You have dishonored me. (commits ritual suicide)
DM: the kenders have it kinda backwards

Grunge: I'm not supposed to bend that way.
Drow Woman: I know…
Grunge:…Oh….

DM: Arrows fly at you from some where in the forrest
Theif: Ok, I run towards the Forbidden City.

Grunge: What's that the kender has…

Lv1 Wizard to Half-Orc Barb.: Hurry! Get on my floating disk and I'll push you acrossed the gorge!

Rudar Dimble · Post by **Rudar Dimble** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 4:09 am

"Well, that's a pretty large red bird"

Galuf the Dwarf · Post by **Galuf the Dwarf** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 9:49 am

*a fighter faces a great red wyrm* This Ring of Minor Fire Resistance should keep me alive!

*his sword melts upon just being clipped by the dragon's flame* Uhhh...

Moonbiter · Post by **Moonbiter** » Sat Apr 03, 2004 8:55 am

There's been a "1001 Famous Last RPG Words" flying around the web for ages. I think I have a print of it somewhere. My fave is:

"Yes, it's true I humiliated the DM in front of the debating team
Wednesday, but he's much too broad-minded to take it out on my character."