On Topic Spam Only. Your Nation...

Kayless · Post by **Kayless** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 7:22 am

Originally posted by Gwalchmai
Well, income tax has gone up one percentage point to 76%, but at least Harry Potter is a best seller.

"NO MORE BOMBS," chant the protestors outside Parliament House, in a repetitious and increasingly annoying appeal. Spokesperson Max Licorish, speaking through a feedback-afflicted microphone, says, "Gwaltopia needs fewer weapons, not more! Make the world a safer place! Disarm now!"

This is the position your government is preparing to adopt (despite the risk of further egging on Kayland and Radomthugopia to more unprovoked violence ).

Excellent.

Maharlika · Post by **Maharlika** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 8:17 am

We have arrived...

...the kenders have finally put their act together and voted me as the Grand High Maharlika.

...it's not like they'd care anyway.

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 10:30 am

Welcome Free Land of Maharlika!

Attention Sleazel:
The Rogue Nation of Voodoodaliania is not returning The Tyrant Weasel's goat due to evidence of unspeakable acts. However, we are willing to allow supervised visits with the goat.

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 10:50 am

The Braumeister made an interesting point concerning the lack of moderators in the Nation message board.

CIA and Porno researchers have forgotten that impurities and trace pathogens can be very good things in Tyrant Cheese. REM: That which does not kill us makes us stronger!

(I hope that Gwaltopia’s tacit endorsement of the Tyrant’s cheese will get him a better price!)

Gwaltopia would also like to point out that we are nearly at the bottom of the list of Greatest Rich-Poor Divides in SYM....

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 10:55 am

Originally posted by VoodooDali
I think you should call your leader Bishop PuPu.

LOL!

That would be good, but could I live with the ridicule?

No, I think Grand Hierophant Gwally is more appropriate.

Originally posted by Tybaltus
Is this the secret alliance?

Gwaltopia has no comment at this time.

Tybaltus · Post by **Tybaltus** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 11:39 am

The country of Tropicalis formally greets the Free Land of Maharlika, and offeres him 20 pineapples as a gesture of peace and friendship.

I could also give you a macaw for a pet. But thats only done in formal alliances.

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 11:45 am

update

The Dictatorship of Randomthugonia
"Kill! Maim! Destroy!"

UN Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights: Some Economy: Developing Political Freedoms: Rare

Location: SYM
The Dictatorship of Randomthugonia is a small, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its strong anti-business politics. Its hard-nosed, cynical population of 7 million are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government -- a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, socially-minded morass -- juggles the competing demands of Defence, Law & Order, and Commerce. The average income tax rate is 40%, but much higher for the wealthy. Private enterprise is illegal, but for those in the know there is a slick and highly efficient black market in Gambling.

Scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes and military spending is on the increase. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is well under control, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Randomthugonia's national animal is the blood thirsty wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the blood of youths.

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 11:51 am

The HoodooVoodoo Guru of the Rogue Nation of Voodoodaliania formally welcomes the Free Land of Maharlika and offers 25 Voos and a pet lemur as a gesture of friendship.

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 11:52 am

The Free Land of Casio Tones bathes in Anarchy...a step up from a Civil Rights Lovefest.

The biker gangs all ride Harleys, too.

Who is the Shadow Lord???

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 12:55 pm

The Issue
Hospitals have requested that they be allowed to pay people for donating blood and other bodily organs, such as kidneys.

The Debate
"We remain critically short of blood plasma and various organs," says VoodooDaliania One hospital administrator Buy Mistletoe. "Especially hearts. A good heart is hard to find. But if we were allowed to pay for donations, we'd get more of them and could save more lives. Plus the donor takes home a few hundred voos in compensation. Unless it's a post-mortem donation, of course. In that case we'd pay the family."
[Accept]

"Great idea," says social commentator Dave Fellow. "Except for one thing. You know who's going to be selling their organs? Poor people! They'll be so desperate for money that they'll sell their own kidneys. Well, a kidney. This is just another way for the rich to buy themselves a better life at the expense of the poor. It must be outlawed."

This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.

My population has gone up to 7 million from 6 million. Surveillance cameras have been banned.

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 1:35 pm

The Free Land of Casio Tones

"A Lemon in Every Garage, and a Lime in Every Corona"

UN Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights: Excellent Economy: Powerhouse Political Freedoms: Some

Location: SYM
The Free Land of Casio Tones is a small, socially progressive nation, renowned for its absence of drug laws. Its hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 8 million are either ruled by a small, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The large government devotes most of its attentions to Commerce, with areas such as Law & Order and Defence receiving almost no funds by comparison. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 14%. A substantial private sector is led by the Woodchip Exports industry, followed by Automobile Manufacturing and Furniture Restoration.

Employers may fire workers without giving any reason, organ donation rates are among the lowest in the region, meat-eating is frowned upon, and thieves are flogged in public for their crimes. Crime is a serious problem, probably because of the country's utter lack of prisons. Casio Tones's national animal is the boll weevil and its currency is the lemon drop.

The Free Land of Casio Tones announces a change of venue. Zen Master Chanak: "I was thinking over coffee yesterday...what's the best way to promote freedom in SYM? Throw flowers...or assist the freedom-loving nations of this dark continent in their endeavors against the machinations of Randomthugonia and the Despot Sleazel? It's been decided...long live freedom!"

Zen Master Chanak adds: "Welcome, Free Land of Maharlika. I heard that your beer is exceptional. Perhaps the Free Land of Casio Tones should enter into negotiations with your trade delegates, and arrive at a satisfactory deal?"

Weasel · Post by **Weasel** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 1:59 pm

An Empire Rises

The Republic of The Tyrant Weasel
*UN Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
*Civil Rights: Below Average
*Economy: Very Strong
*Political Freedoms: Very Good

Location: SYM
The Republic of The Tyrant Weasel is a small, economically powerful nation, renowned for its strong anti-business politics. Its hard-nosed, hard-working population of 8 million have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government -- a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass -- juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Social Welfare. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 30%. Private enterprise is illegal, but for those in the know there is a slick and highly efficient black market in TyrantCheese Exports.

Organ donation rates have hit a new low, bicyclists are banned from major roads, employers may fire workers without giving any reason, and scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes. Crime is a problem. The Tyrant Weasel's national animal is the goat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the tea bag.

Tybaltus · Post by **Tybaltus** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:10 pm

The Issue
Workers across the nation have gone out on indefinite strike over what they claim are substandard wages in the Soda Sales industry.

The Debate
"We are the backbone of this country, and we demand a fair wage rise!" says union leader Buy Fellow. "I don't think a 20% increase over two years is too much to ask. Unless the government forces employers to give us our due, we'll shut this whole industry down! Let's see how well Tropicalis's economy manages without any Soda Sales, huh?

"We pay our employees very generous wages," says employer representative Fleur Utopia. "Especially when you consider that without us, they'd be OUT ON THE STREET. Hear that, you scumbags? OUT ON THE STREET! Anyway, my point is, if you cave in, you make our entire industry uncompetitive. You can't do that in the global marketplace. It'll hurt the whole country. The best solution, economically speaking, would be to relax industrial laws and allow us to fire troublemakers on the spot."

This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.
The Government Position
The government has indicated its intention to follow the recommendations of Option 2

Beyond my country becoming 7 million now, the military funds down, college students selling colons, and being a Catholic nation everything is the same.

Weasel · Post by **Weasel** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:22 pm

Originally posted by Dottie
What exactly is tyrant cheese? Does Weasel have breasts?

Tyrant Cheese comes from the Goats who live on rolling hills of Tyrant Weasel. Our process is top secret, but do know, we have other nations checking to be sure it is safe.

Special of today, 15% off Tyrant Cheese when you buy 10lbs or more. (Tyrant Weasel does except, Master Card, Visa, Swapping of Goods and Bribes....sorry no American Express are allowed

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:22 pm

update

Update on the Free Republic of Bloodonya:

The Free Republic of Bloodonya
"The weak shall not enslave the strong "

UN Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights: Excellent
Economy: Thriving
Political Freedoms: Excellent

Location: SYM
The Free Republic of Bloodonya is a small, economically powerful nation, notable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-nosed, hard-working, intelligent population of 8 million are either ruled by a small, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

There is no government in the normal sense the word; however, a small group of community-minded, pro-business individuals juggles the competing demands of Religion & Spirituality, Law & Order, and Commerce. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Uranium Mining, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Pizza Delivery industries.

The alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, the government's religious works are headed by a New Age guru, and surveillance cameras are banned. Crime is pervasive. Bloodonya's national animal is the wolverine, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its currency is the kroog.

Current Issues
Bloodonya Decides:
Should Democracy be Compulsory?

The Issue
In response to a slow news week, certain highbrow newspapers have stirred up the debate over voluntary vs compulsory voting.

The Debate
#1. "Compulsory voting makes about as much as sense as having the death penalty for attempted suicide," says civil rights activist Violet McGuffin. "You can't force people to be free! You can only give them the choice. Besides, if all those derelicts who can't be bothered to get off their ass once every few years voted, who would they elect? I shudder to think."
[Accept]

#2. "It's not contradictory at all," argues political commentator Sue-Ann Falopian. "The fact is, if not everyone votes, the outcome isn't truly representative. Some groups--like elderly gun nuts--vote more often than others. That's why always we always end up with such terrible politicians."
[Accept]

#3."This raises an interesting issue," says Bill Falopian, your brother. "And that is: why do we need elections, anyway? Seems to me it would be much simpler if you just decided what was right, and did it. Wouldn't that save everyone a lot of time?"
[Accept]

The Government Position: The government is leaning towards #1

The government has yet to formalize a position on this issue.

Bloodonya Decides:
Social Inequality Reaching Embarrassing Levels

The Issue
Commentators have warned that Bloodonya's social inequalities threaten to make it an international pariah.

The Debate
#1. "Look, I don't like it either," said Chamber of Commerce spokesperson Thomas Trax. "Just on the way here, I had to step over three homeless people, and one of my shoes got caught on a beggar. But inequality is the price we pay for economic strength. If anything, we need fewer taxes, so those of us who are well-off can afford to be more generous. If we want to, that is."
[Accept]

#2. "I think we've forgotten what economic strength is all about," says social worker Violet Trax. "The economy is meant to be a means to a high standard of living, not an end in itself. It's become an excuse for the rich to prosper while the poor fall through the cracks. Not everyone is poor because they don't feel like working. We must provide more welfare."
[Accept]

#3."Who says we're an international pariah?" demands military honcho Pete Broadside. "What are their names? If that's the way the international community feels, we obviously need to prepare for war."
[Accept]

The Government Position: The Government is leaning toward #1
The government has yet to formalize a position on this issue.

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:26 pm

Update

*News Flash*
Randomthugonia, like the time bomb it is, has gone up in flames. Civil war runs rampant and the few who side with its leader Thug stand with guns ready. A new flag is being flown in many places, the flag of Ultra Violence. A new age of Randomthugonia is about to begin...

War...

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:34 pm

Oh goody!

Prepare to have thy rear-end kicked, grasshopper.

Weasel · Post by **Weasel** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:46 pm

Tyrant Weasel calls on all Peace loving nations to send "Peace Keepers" to Randomthugonia. The civil unrest must be brought under control.

Audace · Post by **Audace** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 2:55 pm

Hmmm....yes. The Holy Empire of Audace volunteers to secu...uhm keep the peace at those nice goldmines.

Robnark · Post by **Robnark** » Thu Mar 20, 2003 3:20 pm

Right, now I've (grudginly) legalised harry potter, and I've banned all guns from the country.