On Topic Spam Only. Your Nation...

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 4:55 pm

Our First Dismissal of an Issue!

The Issue
Children as young as eight have been spotted gambling in some of Gwaltopia's seedier casinos.

The Debate
1. Social activist Calvin Summers is outraged. "Gambling needs to be outlawed immediately. It's no wonder children are becoming sucked into the vice, with adults setting such a poor example. Gambling is a stain on Gwaltopia's international reputation and it must be stopped!"

2. However, Crown Casino chairperson Jack Hamilton says, "What's wrong with children gambling? It prepares them for the realities of life, teaching them that success or failure is not due to hard work or intelligence, but the roll of the dice. Besides, if kids weren't gambling, they'd be spraypainting trains."

The Government Position
The government is preparing to dismiss this issue. While this is the first issue the GHG has dismissed, he found both options presented too distasteful to even want to be bothered with it.

On a personal note, I am looking forward to seeing how der Moench's nation evolves, since he seems to be dismissing most of his issues!

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 4:57 pm

Originally posted by Weasel
Hmmmm your economy is Imploded.

"Details, details," grumbles the GHG....

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 5:04 pm

MESSAGE
to - Gwaltopia
from - Grandmaster Thug

During a police action upon a gambling ring within the Nation of Randomthugonia citizens of the corrupt Gwaltopia have been arrested within the borders of Randomthugonia. It appears the youth's of Gwaltopia have found a new found addiction with gambling. It is not any news for the citizens of Randomthugonia since it is common place knowledge that Gwaltopia is a hole for excess scum. It is only in our deepest pleasure to announce to your government that the punishment for foriegners who are cought aiding illegall activities within our borders is death by fire.

In twelve hours the illeged criminals will be executed.

If it is to any concern you may attempt to contact us and work out some other outcome...

Robnark · Post by **Robnark** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 5:05 pm

Announcement

For the attention of all neighbours:

The appearance of heavily armed gangs of cyborgs along our mutual borders is nothing to worry about. This farsighted initiative of our beloved Chairman Nark is purely to provide more desparately-needed labour on our fruit plantations.

The rumors and falsehoods spread by the enemies of the people claim there are no longer fruit plantations in Aggrovatia, let alone along our borders. Such falsehoods can only damage relations if perpetuated. Anyone caught spreading the heinous lies that the reason for the fruit industry's demise is the cybernetic modification of all labourers will undergo a prolonged program of death.

It is an unfortunate side effect of producing military-grade cyborg fruit-pickers that they occasionally go on rampages with any weapons they have to hand, however it is still a wise policy to arm them so as to better defend our fruit farms.

So, as not to disturb our fruit picking, Chairman Nark solemnly requests that all military units that are neighbours have along our mutual borders are removed forthwith.

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 5:10 pm

What? I'm sorry, @Thug, did you say something to me?. I was busy checking my lottery tickets....

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 5:29 pm

The mighty Dictatorship of Randomthugonia declares that the neglicgance of Gwaltopia's leaders has caused them the lives of five of thier citizens, whom have been prematurely executed at the hands of the blood thirsty citizens of Randomthugonia. It came to quite the shock when the citizens "free'd" the youth's from the police with force only to turn on them like animals.

Once again this could have been prevented if Gwaltopia had interviened. But it appears as we thought, Gwaltopia is a land of ruin and despair and we find it neccisary for those of SYM to gather round and hear the battle cry. Gwaltopia has released diseased birds upon other nations, shown its war mongering by spreading propaganda to the nation of Randomthugonia, in regards to the Tyrant nation of Weasel and thier so called attempts to poison Randomthugonia's people. And now neglecting its own people, stand tall friends and fight back this evil... I wonder if they have any WMD

Weasel · Post by **Weasel** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 5:40 pm

Originally posted by Robnark
Announcement

Anyone caught spreading the heinous lies that the reason for the fruit industry's demise is the cybernetic modification of all labourers will undergo a prolonged program of death.

Did I get a Telegram from Thug warning me of this??? No....Thug wouldn't spread heinous lies.

Originally posted by RandomThug
in regards to the Tyrant nation of Weasel and thier so called attempts to poison Randomthugonia's people.

I'm pretty sure my top secret meeting has been spied on....

@ you know...Lose lips, sink ships!

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 6:03 pm

@Chanak: the HoodooVoodoo Guru thanks you for your interest in our new national product: Chill Pills. What do you have to trade for them?

@the Grand Hierophant of Gwaltopia:
The Rogue Nation of VoodooDaliania will stand behind her ally, Gwaltopia in the event of any attack. Our lemurs can be quite vicious when provoked!
Of course, a few Chill Pills in Randomthugonia's drinking supply could also do the trick...

The Largest Gambling Industry in SYM

1. The Empire of Nippy
2. The Dominion of Tamerlane
3. The Empire of Avarians
4. The Holy Empire of Audace
5. The Republic of The Tyrant Weasel
6. The Empire of Dave-rovia
7. The Republic of Flibblon
8. The Dominion of Pornografitti
9. The Rogue Nation of Centauringolimpya
10. The Rogue Nation of Kayland

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 6:30 pm

How do you search for the gambling thing? I've had gambling as my main thing since day 1 ...

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 8:04 pm

Government Acts
The Issue
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for VoodooDaliania's Beef-Based Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that lemurs could be added to the menu.

The Debate
"The fact is, the lemur population is out of control," says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson Faith Chicago. "We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have lemur kebabs, lemur pies, lemur-on-a-sticks--the possibilities are endless! Let's not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy."
[Accept]

"I agree that something needs to be done about lemur over-population," says random passer-by Thomas Dodinas, "but eating them? That's kind of gross. Let's just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal."
[Accept]

"I am shocked and appalled!" declared SPCA President Pete Trax. "If anyone needs to be culled, it's us humans. The lemurs were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry--agriculture in particular--to back off. The lemur is part of what makes VoodooDaliania a great nation!"

This is the position your government is preparing to adopt.

Uhhh...due to the lemur overpopulation, I am offering pet lemurs to all other countries - however, if they are not treated humanely, there will be retaliations...

Also, I have found another use for the lemurs...I have trained an ELITE FORCE OF MUTATED ATTACK LEMURS. WATCH OUT RANDONTHUGONIA!

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 8:06 pm

OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

The Free Land of Casio Tones jubilantly declares the beginning of an enlightened age in their blessed realm!

"Long and hard has the esteemed Zen Master CEO Chanak labored on our behalf...guiding us through the darkness and depravity that is the jungle of SYM. Under the firm yet gentle guidance of his hand we have weathered adversity...economic crises...take over attempts by molotov c0cktail-throwing non-bathing bolsheviks...and have have emerged into this, the dawn of our capitalistic corporate glory!

"Monuments shall be built...mothers are naming their sons after him (we advise at this time not to name your daughters after him)...and we, the people of The Free Land of Casio Tones, are pleased to offer Zen Master CEO Chanak the glorious title of...

"Benevolent Dictator."

Yay. I feel like Dorothy when she was welcomed by "The Lollipop Guild" on Wizard of Oz.

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 8:08 pm

Originally posted by Chanak
OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT
Yay.

*giggle*

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 8:56 pm

The HoodooVoodoo Guru of Voodoodaliania says:
My nation's better than yours is! Nyaa-nyaa nyaa-nyaa nyaa nyaa.

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:02 pm

Originally posted by VoodooDali
The HoodooVoodoo Guru of Voodoodaliania says:
My nation's better than yours is! Nyaa-nyaa nyaa-nyaa nyaa nyaa...

Uuuh uuu...mine is the best......

*PTHLTHHHTHHHHH*

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:27 pm

Originally posted by Scayde
Uuuh uuu...mine is the best......

*PTHLTHHHTHHHHH*

Dammy...

You look irresistably cute when you do that.

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:39 pm

LOL @ Chanak

*kiss*

*clears throat*..in other news...the Free Republic of Bloodonya is faced with another issue.

Bloodonya Decides:
Where's the Love Gone?

The Issue
Last night the respected tabloid TV show "60 Minutes" ran a report on Bloodonya's rising divorce rate. What is happening to the nuclear family?

The Debate
"There's a simple solution," says Pastor Felix, of the Catholic Church. "Divorce should be illegal. 'For better or worse,' anyone remember how that goes? We should return to the good old days, when you got married for life and stuck by your partner no matter how much of a drunken, abusive, adulterating disappointment they turned out to be."
[Accept]

John Black, author of the hit book, 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Some Whole Other Place,' has a simpler solution. "If couples would just call each other 'darling' once in a while, there would be far fewer relationship breakdowns. A little affection is all it takes. So the government should make it mandatory: call your spouse 'darling' at least once a day, or face a fine."
[Accept]

"There's a simple way to boost the marriage rate," says gay rights activist Peggy Love. "Abolish those arcane laws that discriminate against same-sex marriages. It's obscene to treat people differently because of their sexual preference. Besides, everyone knows gay relationships are more stable than straight ones."
[Accept]

The Government Position
The government has yet to formalize a position on this issue.

If you wish, you may simply dismiss this issue.

, The CEO, in a formal announcement has addressed the issue.

"I plan on dismissing this issue outright. If legislation is pushed through, I shall veto any and all legislation regarding marriage. The government has no place in the bedroom of its citizens. any marriage, or lack there of, shall be left solely to the discretion of the privacy of the individuals directly involved."

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:41 pm

Benevolent Dictator Chanak says: "My economy is better than yours is! Ha ha ha ha haaaaa ha!"

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:43 pm

update

The Free Republic of Bloodonya
"The weak shall not enslave the strong "

UN Category: Corporate Bordello

Civil Rights: Excellent
Economy: Very Strong
Political Freedoms: Excellent

Location: SYM
The Free Republic of Bloodonya is a small, devout nation, renowned for its compulsory military service. Its hard-nosed, hard-working, intelligent population of 9 million are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

There is no government in the normal sense the word; however, a small group of community-minded, pro-business individuals juggles the competing demands of Religion & Spirituality, Law & Order, and Commerce. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Uranium Mining, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Pizza Delivery industries.

Voting is voluntary, the streets are increasingly clogged with poverty-stricken beggars, a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway, and employers may fire workers without giving any reason. Crime is crippling. Bloodonya's national animal is the wolverine, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its currency is the kroog.

Nightmare · Post by **Nightmare** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 9:59 pm

The Empire of A Masquerade
"Masquerade your life away."

UN Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights: Unheard Of

Economy: Fragile
Political Freedoms: Outlawed

Location: SYM
The Empire of A Masquerade is a tiny, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-nosed, cynical population of 5 million are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government -- a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded morass -- is effectively ruled by the Department of Law & Order, with areas such as Social Welfare and Religion & Spirituality receiving almost no funds by comparison. The average income tax rate is 46%, but much higher for the wealthy. Private enterprise is illegal, but for those in the know there is a slick and highly efficient black market in Book Publishing.

Crime -- especially youth-related -- is well under control, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. A Masquerade's national animal is the raven, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the mask.

---------------------------

My nice little nation (of course, I choose answers so it turned out this way

). I shall be known as "The Archmage of Nightmares".

VoodooDali · Post by **VoodooDali** » Fri Mar 21, 2003 10:12 pm

The Rogue Nation of VoodooDaliania welcomes the Empire of a Masquerade to SYM. Please accept 10 Chill Pills and a pet lemur as a token of our hospitality.

wonders what this means..another RandomThugonia? Or a different thing altogether?