Hey guys I'm back just thought i would bring a little redneck cheer to all your lives with 1009 uses for duct tape even though theres more lol.
1. keeping an old single engine air plane together
2. a shimmery new finish on those old s h o es you l o v e so much
3. a key point in an April Fool's Prank booby trap
4. water proofing a boat
5. keeping someone quiet
6. hair remover (ouch )
7. fix a broken tail light
8. make duct tape rope ( it would take a lot of it though)
9. really weird w a l l p a pe r
10. mark a basket ball court
11. make a nice shirt
12. chewy toy for a dog when wrapped a few times around news paper
13. a sweet wallet
14. braclet and draw watch face on there and have a dead watch
15. patch hole in swimming pool liner just temp though
almost there just need 994 more uses for duct tape now come on guys! lol
16. If your keys fall down a sewer grate...take a long stick, wad up duct tape on the end of it (sticky side out)...retrieve your keys.
17. Create new fashions out of colored duct tape...coats, pants...why, even shoes.
18. If the serpentine belt on your automobile breaks, never fear....take some bailing wire, wrap it up with duct tape, use it for the belt, it will get you home.
19. Keep losing your wallet? No problem, duct tape that sucker to your hand.
CYNIC, n.:
A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. -[url="http://www.alcyone.com/max/lit/devils/a.html"]The Devil's Dictionary[/url]
24: taping ducts
25: keeping your hostages quiet
26: pretending to be a futuristic mummy
27: cheap and, frankly, useless fly papers
28: a handy adhesive garrotte
Here where the flattering and mendacious swarm
Of lying epitaths their secrets keep,
At last incapable of further harm
The lewd forefathers of the village sleep.
29: Tire Patch
30: handy dandy bandages (especially when a out of control rocket car hits you ouch!)
31) Inexpensive Diet control device, instead of stapling you know
32) Instant working Heimleich maneuver
33) The biggest high imaginable, if you put enough of it on you, you do know the adhesive is vaguely hallucinagenetic.
34) Very useful condom, that is if your willing to endure some pain.
35) Good bludgeon, if you have a stick you can even make a hand dandy flail.
36) Make your own personal BowFlex, and without ordering it on TV
37) Errrm if your head is ever decapitated, or other parts start falling off, its great for keeping them on.
38) It'd be a good whip, to ouch it even sticks.
"In Germany, they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the homosexuals and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a homosexual. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a protestant. Then they came for me--but by that time there was no one left to speak up."
Pastor Martin Neimoller
Infinity is a fathomless gulf, into which all things vanish.
Marcus Aurelius (121-180) Roman Emperor and Philosopher
To see a world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.
39) To seal the holes fish get when used as a shield substitute during jousts.
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.
45. Going further with Scayde's use...missing that window altogether? Duct tape the window opening, then cut out a hole that allows you to see your side-view mirror. Save $$$
46. Out of clean underwear?
47. Child-proofing: duct tape all breakables in place around the house; spare those hierlooms from toddlers.
CYNIC, n.:
A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. -[url="http://www.alcyone.com/max/lit/devils/a.html"]The Devil's Dictionary[/url]
48: Put it on the carpet, pour some water and you've got your own slip and slide.
I kill two dwarves in the morning, I kill two dwarves at night. I kill two dwarves in the afternoon, and then I feel alright. I kill two dwarves in time of peace and two in time of war. I kill two dwarves before I kill two dwarves, and then I kill two more. I may be bad, but I feel good.
52) Great for reinforcing buses when trying to escape from a zombie horde.
"In Germany, they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the homosexuals and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a homosexual. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a protestant. Then they came for me--but by that time there was no one left to speak up."
Pastor Martin Neimoller
Infinity is a fathomless gulf, into which all things vanish.
Marcus Aurelius (121-180) Roman Emperor and Philosopher
To see a world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.
54.) Decorating tip. If you really, really want people to say wow when the walk into your home. Line everything from the walls to the silverware in Ducktape. They might never talk to you again, but atleast they'll say wow.
I kill two dwarves in the morning, I kill two dwarves at night. I kill two dwarves in the afternoon, and then I feel alright. I kill two dwarves in time of peace and two in time of war. I kill two dwarves before I kill two dwarves, and then I kill two more. I may be bad, but I feel good.
with 1009 uses for duct tape even though theres more lol. 
