10 Great reasons to play a Malkavian

cjdevito · Post by **cjdevito** » Sun Nov 21, 2004 2:54 am

10. Jack's reaction in the tutorial when he realizes what clan you are: priceless.

9. Getting to call Velvet "Susan"

8. "I hate to tell you this, but I'm insane and what you're saying STILL doesn't make sense to me."

7. "You're a hungry bear. Why don't you eat the two salmon next to you?"

6. The White Daughter of Janus makes perfect sense.

5. Revealing Ming Xiao's secrets... to Ming Xiao.

4. "No, you are not the voice in my head. That voice sounds different."
"Maybe I killed the voice in your head and took it's place?"

3. "I am your pet turtle from when you were a child."
"SHELLY! I'm so sorry I flushed you. Can I have a hug?"
"Not a good idea, I'm swarming with salmonella you know."

2. "In my experience the most erotic portion of the female anatomy is the boobies."

And the number one reason to play a malkavian....
1. The Pimp-tastic 3 foot tall Doctor Seuss Cat-in-the-Hat Hat that's a part of your heavy armor.

Raven La'Teris · Post by **Raven La'Teris** » Sun Nov 21, 2004 12:09 pm

You must add another to that list as an Addendum...the skanky school girl outfit the Malkavian females have is absolutely...delicious.

vesselle · Post by **vesselle** » Sun Nov 21, 2004 3:11 pm

i love my malky's responses. and i love that the letters are so funky and squiggly... a lot like the thoughts in her head. but my favorite phrase of hers is: "wobbly are the walls of my mind".

V***V

cjdevito · Post by **cjdevito** » Sun Nov 21, 2004 10:53 pm

Heh. I do have to add a few more I just ran into tonight....

11. "WHY? WHY MUST THE HOOPS I MUST JUMP THROUGH BE SET ON FIRE?"

12. I walked into my haven and the television started talking to me. No, really - it started a conversation.

13. "Boy, I bet you're relieved that didn't have tentacles."

14. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but did we just kill a land shark?"

meanie · Post by **meanie** » Sat Nov 27, 2004 9:00 pm

my favourite Malkavian response so far would have to be his farewell/insult to Chunk .. the doorman at Lacroix's Tower

"May the fat of many animals fill your belly"

yeh i must agree Malkavian are the best clan, so far .. their insane responses are the best and mentioned before that crazy Heavy Leather Armor .. pure comedy

edit :

along the lines of funny moments in the game .. i do have a laugh at the Bail Bonds building .. while talking to the guy there, on the radio there is the Firggin' Chicken comercial .. had a good laugh at that..

- "Are you trying to feed me cat vomit ?!"
- "Here try this"
- "MMmmm .. whats this ?"
- "iTS FRiGGiN CHiCKEN !!"

Gauda · Post by **Gauda** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 6:48 am

Yeah, that friggin chicken commercial is propably the funniest I've heard yet.

meanie · Post by **meanie** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 2:58 pm

Female Malkavian

WooOHoOO !

- her initial clothes are sexy .. the short mini with the g-string half showing

- but that crazy cowgirl costume .. goto love that thing

Ar.Pi · Post by **Ar.Pi** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 10:17 pm

ok guys u convinsed me to play the game for the third time

btw the Dabe show is completly histerical , i just love the commercials there
"Does ur penis ever gets in the way?"
"Vote for the only candidate that isnt a pedophile"

Deidre · Post by **Deidre** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 3:30 pm

I wish the voices in our head talked to us more. It gets lonely in here sometimes.

Fellow truth seers know what I mean. I haven't finished, but only conversing with a certain person did one of my voices say something to me each time we exchanged words. And I am not talking about the false voice pretending to be in my head.

kthim · Post by **kthim** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 8:27 pm

Even the fattest frog has to return to the pond, ribbit ribbit!

Igni · Post by **Igni** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 3:08 pm

Nothing short of amazing

This game absolutely rules. They cut no corners in making in this game (well Chinatown could have used a few more quests, but anyway). The Malkavian gets several unique conversations pieces, all of which required scripting and voice acting just for this one race. It's fabulous. The most outstanding so far: you get really solid advice from the girl on the beach if you pony up the $20. She tells you who you can trust, words that can save your life. They would have made no sense to me at the time, but looking back, she's telling you the genuine truth. Absolutely well done game.

Another example, you can catch Knox in a lie and get exp for it. Really well done Troika.

As a female Malk, do I get the Dr. Seuss hat too?

Deidre · Post by **Deidre** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 4:13 pm

Female Malkie gets the cowgirl outfit for heavy cloth and a kinky cop costume for light leather. Heavy leather is a lace up leather bodice/jacket with matching tight leather pants.

One of the more entertaining things about playing a Malkavian, are you really sure all of the gameplay bugs are bugs?

matthew13 · Post by **matthew13** » Mon Dec 06, 2004 3:11 pm

Another good reason. . .

. . .THE VOICES. Just cruised through the Diner in Santa Monica and, while talking with the red headed stranger, heard a voice say (I think) "try the free arsenic". Also, watching TV can be very interesting.

Rhydderch Hael · Post by **Rhydderch Hael** » Sun Jan 30, 2005 3:05 am

Copper: "There's nothing I can do. I'm damned..."
Malk: "And I'm a dinosaur! RAAAAWWWWRRR!"

Shadowuser · Post by **Shadowuser** » Sun Jan 30, 2005 4:24 am

I played my first time through as a Tremere. I just started the game again using a Malk. I almost fell out of my chair after hearing Jack's opinions about my new "condition". The responses I can choose from are splendid. Boy is this gonna be FUN!

malky · Post by **malky** » Sun Jan 30, 2005 1:02 pm

I liked the part...
"Weapons never solved anything...I'll take twelve"
The stopsign starting an arguement with me.
There were a few others, but I can't think of 'em.

KRose · Post by **KRose** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 10:53 am

Talking to LaCroix as a Malk is interesting... His initial response after you tell him what happened in Santa Monica : "Yes... Yes, I'm sure it was quite the experiance." XD
Also, after you do the museum quest and *SPOILERS* find out the sarcophagus (Spelling?) has been stolen, you can tell LaCroix: "It was stolen, but there were lots of Dinosaurs, so I had fun." And of course, the touching moment where My Malk and the TV had a conversation... exchanging jokes, talking about life... Yes, my Malk really bonded with the TV there.

schlacta · Post by **schlacta** » Sun Feb 06, 2005 2:20 am

ah damn.

I'm a Malkavian my first time through. I've been looking forward to going through the game again, possibly as a Tremere, but I'm afraid it's just not going to be that interesting.

Who Cares · Post by **Who Cares** » Sun Feb 06, 2005 10:35 am

Talking to Beckett just before you go after the kidnap victim.

The response to his acurate assesment about sucking up to Lacroix:
I don't want to get involved either, but tell that to whoever is playing me!

Hello_kitty · Post by **Hello_kitty** » Mon Feb 07, 2005 2:17 am

When you give Becket the information you got from the archeologist:
"Llama stu, the recipe is on the box" (referring to the goddess on the sarcophagus)

When you ask Beckett what is in the sarcophagus
malk -"What's in the box?"
Beckett -"Why don't you put your ear against it, I'll shake it and you tell me what you think is inside"

ofcourse the arguement wth the stopsign

in santa monica when the guard in the hospital stops you, if you use dementation
"I'm a keychain, feed me"

"Prince lacroix and Ming Xiao, sitting in a tree, p-l-o-t-t-i-n-g"

and that cow girl costume should be sneaking -1

When going to get the script for VV/Susan, in Hollywood
"I am the great thesaurus, give me the script or I'll bite your head off, grrraaawl"

remind me why I played ventrue first? I'm having the time of my life as a malk, too bad I'm almost finished again