The Heathen Citadel

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 1:01 pm

weve been developing cancer curing gland cream, but so far it only works with testicular cancer, breast cancer, melanoma, and crack heads.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 1:12 pm

Well, that's a good start. Are we pouring money into a Research Department?

Who knows what wonders MG's could achieve?

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 2:21 pm

i tihnk hill would be good for r n d, being the science type that he is he should know what glands cure whichdisease/create which flavors and color.
Next flavor ideas:
Tie-Dye/rainbow
blueberry
all natural w/ no added preservatives
bacon
we will thin proceed to take icecreem out of coke floats replacing with gland cream and pigmy shrews.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 2:32 pm

[QUOTE=Phreddie]i tihnk hill would be good for r n d, being the science type that he is he should know what glands cure whichdisease/create which flavors and color.[/QUOTE]

Well, he is the microbiologist...don't you need a zoologist too?

Tie-Dye/rainbow- That's just a colour, right?

blueberry - The Vegetarian option?
all natural w/ no added preservatives - Ah, the au natural approach. Good for Organic food fans...
bacon - The full-fat option.
we will thin proceed to take icecreem out of coke floats replacing with gland cream and pigmy shrews.- I don't even know what to say about that.

Add strawberry to the list. A citrus flavour (Lemon and/or Lime). Hmmm....*thinks of more*

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:41 pm

we already have lemon lime but to be mroe child/ alcoholic friendly i am making an executive decision to remove the names of all fruits form flavors and replace them with colors our flavors include:
rainbow- alil bit of evrything
red- cow glands
yellowish/greenish- monkey mammary glands and sheep esophagus
pink- sheep glands
brown- pig glands with splatterings of bacon
blue- blue jay glands
white- non fat no preservatives pigmy shrew glands
cream- man glands
and the specialty flavor with no color name:
swedish burrito gland cream- made with reall swedish burritos and glands from real swedes.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:47 pm

I see you're broadening out to other animal glands...

So what colour is no colour? The transparent flavour?

cream- man glands

Who's the lucky man?

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:49 pm

thats the mystery flavor *mixes every gland known to man ina blender adds rum and fruit punch with a little cayenne peppers* no one knows what the secret formula is, it jsut makes every one very happy if they eat enough.

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:50 pm

[QUOTE=Ravager]Who's the lucky man?

[/QUOTE]

well chu hasnt shown up, so the next one to offend me gets sent to the crematories.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:59 pm

Oh, uh..my turn. Right...

[QUOTE=Phreddie]no one knows what the secret formula is, it jsut makes every one very happy if they eat enough.[/QUOTE]

Sounds good. I'll take it!

What's next? We have patents, marketing, retail, what about pricing?

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:02 pm

were short on labor, i hate to draw on slave labor form the keebler elves, they r already doing enough by harvesting the glands and prepearing them for the ovens, but unless we cna hire some new folks ill be forced to outsource to china or to keeblerland.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:08 pm

Right, hiring. We have to put together a package of benefits. Maybe a dental plan?

Regular tea breaks...

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:26 pm

Tea breaks? what are you an englishman? they get 5 minute COFFEE breaks every two hours, one hour lunches, a dental plan, general medical care (including plastic surgery for the last forutnate sales reps), free room and board, and say 15k (american dollars) a year, they wouldnt need ot much money except for booz seeing as the have free food and shelter.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:28 pm

[QUOTE=Phreddie]Tea breaks? what are you an englishman? [/QUOTE]

Uh...actually, yeah I am!

So I was saying patents rather than copyrights for your benefit.

[QUOTE=Phreddie]they get 5 minute COFFEE breaks every two hours, one hour lunches, a dental plan, general medical care (including plastic surgery for the last forutnate sales reps), free room and board, and say 15k (american dollars) a year, they wouldnt need ot much money except for booz seeing as the have free food and shelter.[/QUOTE]

Sounds like the perfect lifestyle.

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:31 pm

oh yeah and they cna make all the gland cream they want form left ovr supplies at the end of the month, the employee who makes the best new type that is liked by the public will get 5000 dollars on the spot anda an extra 10000 a year untila new type that is better is created.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:35 pm

Bonuses too? That should draw in the punters....

So product pricing next?

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:41 pm

Because of the quality of trhe product and the cost of production and maintenance it pricing for generic should be 3 dollars a quart, and ten dollars a gallon. What you say? gas is cheaper than that! fine go buy a couple gallons fo gas and eat that!

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:45 pm

Heh, you don't really need to defend your pricing policy to me. I'm no expert. Though you could label it homeopathic and sell for higher prices.

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:47 pm

I could even label it frda aproved and sell it, but theres all those legal issues, and with the cops following me wondering wers those glanding giving people went... well lets jsut say we stockpile for nwo and and have a grand opening sometime soon.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:48 pm

Yeah, there should be a great bonanza with lots of celebrity A-List guests.

I'll sleep on the other stuff.

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 4:56 pm

celebs be a good idea, i think we invite the next summit meeting (the tihng were big shot poloticians from different countries get together and disagree on everytihng) to be hosted at our headquarters in the non existant state of wyoming.

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