The HBI - Heathen Bureau of Investigation

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sun Nov 06, 2005 11:57 am

[QUOTE=dj_venom]Fiona, why do you arrive at the worst moments. You did it in the Spam Factory to poor Sononara, and now you are doing it to me

.[/QUOTE]

I thought she was gathering evidence to frame me? :devil:

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Sun Nov 06, 2005 4:21 pm

I think you are now off the hook/rack now that they have a new target of investigation.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Sun Nov 06, 2005 5:03 pm

See, this confused me. I was on the rack, then I was on the run...and now I've been forgotten. Meh. *shrugs*
What evil act should I contemplate next? :devil: Mwaahaha!

That was a joke, people. I would never perform an evil act as such!

CM · Post by CM » Mon Nov 07, 2005 5:35 am

So i am guessing i am free.

Lestat · Post by **Lestat** » Mon Nov 07, 2005 5:59 am

[QUOTE=CM]So i am guessing i am free.

[/QUOTE]Hah, you'd wish. Just the following quote from the spam factory could get you in trouble:[QUOTE=CM]Ravvy here hates metal. Please kill on sight if anybody sees ravvy [/QUOTE]Incitement to murder, you fiend!

CM · Post by CM » Mon Nov 07, 2005 6:12 am

You can it murder i call it early attainment of heaven

Lestat · Post by **Lestat** » Mon Nov 07, 2005 9:21 am

[QUOTE=CM]You can it murder i call it early attainment of heaven

[/QUOTE]
You mean that the one who murders Ravvy will get a free ticket to paradise???

Hmmm... :mischief:

Fiona · Post by **Fiona** » Mon Nov 07, 2005 12:53 pm

Forget it, Lestat. You wouldn't be happy there

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Mon Nov 07, 2005 12:59 pm

Besides, I don't hate metal anymore...so killing me would be kind of empty...

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Mon Nov 07, 2005 4:10 pm

[QUOTE=Ravager]Besides, I don't hate metal anymore...so killing me would be kind of empty...

[/QUOTE]
Correction:
The actual slaying would leave one with a sense of extreme satisfaction.
The supplied motive no longer applies.
My motive does.
My motive is that you haven't payed for my services during your investigation.

slade · Post by **slade** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:01 pm

*unlocks doors* here you go Luis *hands back the key* Ok now the HBI is open for cases....
First case to look at is Rav's abduction......please Rav could you decribe everything that has happen to you?

Luis Antonio · Post by **Luis Antonio** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:05 pm

Ik shall replace Phreddie.

Phreddie shall be investigated.

Rav, what do you feel about being abducted? Are you personally realized? I mean, was it what you mean in therms of the probing? You know, the probe the aliens insert on people? Please, denial will lead you nowhere.

slade · Post by **slade** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:14 pm

[QUOTE=Luis Antonio] I mean, was it what you mean in therms of the probing? You know, the probe the aliens insert on people? Please, denial will lead you nowhere.[/QUOTE]
*pulls Luis to the side*..... *Whispers*where are you going with this Luis?

anyways Rav have you come into contact with this man
here look at this

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:24 pm

My Account

Well, this morning I was travelling on a train, as I do when I travel to University and was approached by some fellow who appeared much like the one in that picture. He identified himself as an MSN employee and said that the company would be interested in my help. I politely declined, I'm studying a degree, I can't just abandon it!
Anyway, as I was switching trains and walking between stations a van drove up and a group of darkly clothed individuals leaped out, taking me by surprise and bundling me into their van. They gagged andd blindfolded me and took me on a long drive.
When we eventually arrived I was pushed into a room with a computer and told to make software 'worthy of the British public'. I dazedly worked on it, despite a lack of resources and the requirement to use substandard equipment, until eventually I heard the sounds of elephants.
Then I was rescued, barely getting away in one piece...
Commuting is so dangerous these days...

Luis Antonio · Post by **Luis Antonio** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:24 pm

[QUOTE=Eric Cartman]I know this is a dream, I know I didnt have an anal probe, and I know that I'm not under alien control![/QUOTE]

That is the evidence. South park never lies.

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:28 pm

Did it swear on that?

slade · Post by **slade** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:31 pm

Will there you have it...
now Rav I need to know if when we bring this to trail can you explain this to the court like you did today??

In reference to Southpark...ofcourse it never lies...

Ravager · Post by **Ravager** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:34 pm

[QUOTE=slade]Will there you have it...
now Rav I need to know if when we bring this to trail can you explain this to the court like you did today??
[/QUOTE]

Oh no, I'll be far more tearful and innocent-like.

ik911 · Post by **ik911** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:37 pm

I shall speak on behalf of the aliens, for they could not attend this case. I tried contacting them, but got little response.

On behalf of the alien population, I demand that he returns the probe that he stole and concieved in his 'rectal cavity' and pays the court a fine of 1,000 Tequilas out of his own pocket for smuggling intergalactical material and another 1,000 beers to the aliens for damagecompensation, OR 40 hours of dancing-naked-in-public.

Fiona · Post by **Fiona** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 4:37 pm

*Gives Ravager another Margarita, just to be sure*:mischief:

@IK. Sorry but hearsay evidence is not admissable. Bring your witnesses but take note that is a completely separate issue and has no bearing on this case at all. If you can produce the complainant he can make a statement and take his place in the queue of cases awaiting trial