Policy, Policy, What Is My New Policy? (Whining Will Be Met With Strict Discipline)

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 1:09 am

With all this wonderful talk about policy, I have actually begun to sit down, and seriously think about my personal policies. (Which means, all you people hoping this is a thread regarding the recent change in decisions can sit and rotate. Or rotate and sit. Personally, I do not care which order). Essentially, though, it is encouraged me to think about how I live and govern my own life, and what has become the focus of my day to day living, and how it affects other people.

For instance, something as simple as being curt, or dismissive is a a behaviour I will sometimes adopt, thought not as a first option. Mostly because I find myself, literally, dealing with the hordes of rejects called consumers on a day to day basis. Frankly, I hate them, and would be more than willing to offer free, swift kicks to junk for everyone of them, but I digress (as well as ignore said urge through use of a highly used stress Weasel. Hurry, and order one now! Only $19.95! What a steal!) When one becomes tired, and irritable, it is easy to regress to such behaviour. Of course, being naturally cynical does not help the issue.

Of course, I also have an annoying habit of being overly energetic when others are not, leading to some interesting banter, to say the least. Fortunatly, they are already worn down, and easy pickings, much like a mature hyena will pick off the sick gazelle... Only I am more violent and graphic about it. Ok, so maybe less entrails, but hey, you get the picture.

But it is with these thoughts, that I would like to reintroduce an old policy of mine to these forums. Frankly, you have all become weak! Weakness is your one flaw. Weakness and lethargy. Weakness and lethargy are your only two flaws. Weakness, lethargy and spam. Those are your three... Crap...

Anyway, suffice to say, I have not been handing out enough fish slaps. Therefore, starting today, I will begin the roving sturgeon slap program. The goals I hope to achieve (besides pure enjoyment on my part) will involve bruising, cruising, and hopefully a lingering fishy smell on all those who have victimized by my Sturgeon of power!

Boom, baby, The Sage is back!

slade · Post by **slade** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 1:54 am

its about damn time!, now get of your attention whore ass off the chair and fish slap me!

hurry I didnt cut in line for nothing.

Xandax · Post by **Xandax** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 6:18 am

With fear of getting fish-slapped..... but I'm speechless. I don't know if that is a good or bad thing though

DesR85 · Post by **DesR85** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:18 am

I read the first post twice and I have no idea what is this thread all about.

Xandax · Post by **Xandax** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:28 am

DesR85 wrote:I read the first post twice and I have no idea what is this thread all about.

Aegis is gonna fish-slap people .... that's all I deducted

DesR85 · Post by **DesR85** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:34 am

Xandax wrote:Aegis is gonna fish-slap people .... that's all I deducted

Okay.....right, I'll make a tactical withdrawal before getting fish-slapped.

*whips out Thompson and starts laying down suppressive fire before making a run for the hills* (gee, been playing Call of Duty 2 for one too many times)

fable · Post by **fable** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:39 am

We could carry around black magic markers and draw moustaches on any fish as they slap us. Aegis would have to immediately replace them, or risk being accused of illegally transporting fish with facial hair across a national border.

But that still means the person wielding the marker ends up fish-slapped. And I, for one, will not risk it.

Xandax · Post by **Xandax** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:43 am

fable wrote:We could carry around black magic markers and draw moustaches on any fish as they slap us. Aegis would have to immediately replace them, or risk being accused of illegally transporting fish with facial hair across a national border.

But that still means the person wielding the marker ends up fish-slapped. And I, for one, will not risk it.

LOL - mental image of somebody sneaking around trying to draw facial hair of fish, trying to avoid getting slapped with the them

Phreddie · Post by **Phreddie** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 7:47 am

Gah, my former mentor has returned to torment? Heh, I agree with slade, its about damn time. However I do not intend to get slapped... must think of precautions as avoiding Aegis would jsut be no fun...

Eureka! *Picks up Fishing line, hook, bait, net* Here fishy, fishy.

Chimaera182 · Post by **Chimaera182** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 9:22 am

Weakness is your one flaw. Weakness and lethargy. Weakness and lethargy are your only two flaws. Weakness, lethargy and spam. Those are your three... Crap...

Points for the Monty Python reference (although I figure the fish-slapping could also be considered one). That's really all I have to say on the matter.

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 5:18 pm

[quote="Aegis]Anyway"]

Can I please have a turbut slap instead? Then I can at least bring it home and ask Dottie to cook it!

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 8:15 pm

SLAP
Stop emasculating my fish slapping technique! There is no way my fish will be pansy cheese eating surrender monkey looking like-ers! My Fish are strong, manly and Canadian! No less will do!

Editted due to new information

Darzog · Post by **Darzog** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 8:35 pm

Is it really necessary to fish-slap banned people?

ch85us2001 · Post by **ch85us2001** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 8:58 pm

Would that be "Don't let the fish slap you on the way out"?

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Tue Aug 22, 2006 9:41 pm

Darzog wrote:Is it really necessary to fish-slap banned people?

I failed to noticed that at the time of posting. Seems somewhat in poor taste, so I have gone back to edit that. I guess he just could not leave well enough alone...

SLAP

That is for pointing out my flaws! And because it feels so good...

Darzog · Post by **Darzog** » Wed Aug 23, 2006 6:20 am

Aegis wrote:SLAP

That is for pointing out my flaws! And because it feels so good...

I'm now properly chastened.

And smelly.

slade · Post by **slade** » Wed Aug 23, 2006 6:26 am

DesR85 wrote: making a run for the hills*

dont run to his clones, Hill will do unimaginable things to you in his lab.....you may not be able to sit for a week

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed Aug 23, 2006 6:33 am

Darzog wrote:I'm now properly chastened.

And smelly.

Depends on the kind of fish he used. And the sauce. Never forget the sauce.

Minerva · Post by **Minerva** » Wed Aug 23, 2006 7:02 am

fable wrote:Depends on the kind of fish he used. And the sauce. Never forget the sauce.

What!? Are you telling me he is slapping with fish in sauce!?
Never!

If he wants to slap people with a fish, it's got to be fresh. Anyone who uses a few days old cooked fish shoud be punished by bacon slapping.
Or, maybe ham.

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed Aug 23, 2006 7:11 am

Minerva wrote:What!? Are you telling me he is slapping with fish in sauce!?
Never! If he wants to slap people with a fish, it's got to be fresh. Anyone who uses a few days old cooked fish shoud be punished by bacon slapping.
Or, maybe ham.

Now, that's just perverted.

I wasn't clear enough, above. I'm not suggesting Aegis employs sauce while fish slapping. That would be silly. No, I'm suggesting Aegis sleeps in fish sauce. At least, that's what the rumors say. It would help explain a lot.