The Strangest, Part Deux: The Evil Twin Strikes Back

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Thu Jul 19, 2007 10:13 am

... Hmm, well, depending on your aesthetic preferences, Taylor might look like a nerd or she might not. But there is definitely no hint of rabbit; killer or otherwise.

Yikes! You realise the vulnerability of your situation. Here you are sitting in the lap of something with sharp, and oh dear... serated incisors...

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:46 pm

...they look faintly familiar... Did you read about such teeth some time ago? No, you haven't read a single book in your life... Maybe you played a game... that is more likely... something about the masquerade... yeah, that’s it!
Now you know what to do. You quickly put your favorite Rodeo Clown costume and hippie jewelry on and…

AmpaSand · Post by **AmpaSand** » Thu Jul 19, 2007 9:10 pm

....Watch the fanged nerd run at you to miss and end up with her teeth in the wall.

(static) "This is your Evil brother" you hear. " Are you ever going to get aound to gettng even close to my hidden super hide out on tenalpdiputs?"

Spoiler

hint read backwards

Well that settled something....

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Thu Jul 19, 2007 10:04 pm

...oh yeah, you had a good time, now back to business.
You are approaching 666-Prime now, thanks to autopilot.
Still wearing the Rodeo Clown outfit, you navigate your saucer through the dust and land on the surface of a VERY small asteroid. It is so small that gravity is close to zero, so you have to hitch your saucer to the special hitching post (saucer-hitching posts are common on the asteroids). You know that the location of your evil twin's secret castle is going to be revealed shortly. But how?.. You have a bad feeling about all this...

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Fri Jul 20, 2007 10:25 am

You look out of one of the saucer's portals. The asteroid devoid of atmosphere, is dead as a DoDo. Just rocks and more rocks... but wait a minute...a faint shimmer can be seen just at the edge of your vision...

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Fri Jul 20, 2007 3:57 pm

…that’s our sponsors! They really want to sell you something for just $19.99 plus shipping and handling (restrictions apply, naturally… Oh, and don’t bother if you live in Arizona, Canada or Puerto-Rico: nobody in their right mind would ever ship anything to Arizona, Canada or Puerto-Rico), but wait, there is more! Call within next 13 seconds and they will add another something, ABSOLUTELY FREE!!! That’s right, for just $19.99 they are going to sell you something double-something which you can promptly return for a full refund, no questions asked. Call now!

Hypnotized, you make a call…

AmpaSand · Post by **AmpaSand** » Fri Jul 20, 2007 10:59 pm

....And immediatly the alarms go off, this just happened to be the head quarters of the As Seen On Tv Network! They will never sell anything face to face so as the robots come flying out....

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Mon Jul 23, 2007 11:48 am

...of the gates of a castle/HQ of As Seen on TV Network, whose architectural design is strangely Neogothic. You squint a little and give the protal a hasty wipe [getting steamy with your breath]. Ah, yes what a nice touch, vampire bats are whirling above the robots storming towards your vessel [your evil twin always did fancy himself as a bit of a Goth...]. But what's this?...

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Mon Jul 23, 2007 6:00 pm

...among the horde of vampire bats (telemarketers from As Seen on TV) and robots (happy customers determined to share their customer satisfaction with you) you see a ghostly figure of the Seer. Aha! You need to reach the Seer and ask him a question (if you only remember the question!). But how? The bats and robots are getting closer...

Tribblemaker · Post by **Tribblemaker** » Mon Jul 23, 2007 7:54 pm

. . .simple!

You yank from your trusty leather knapsack a Dimage X Digital Camera. As the scary flying robots swoop down upon you, you go snap-happy. Flash! Flash! Flashflash! As the the gothic badbots realize that they've accidentally gone after a reporter, they beg for forgiveness and offer you their spare parts if you promise not to publicize their unprovoked attack on an innocent.

AmpaSand · Post by **AmpaSand** » Mon Jul 23, 2007 10:32 pm

Then they proceed down the militant path and tie you up and force you to make a state ment saying....

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Tue Jul 24, 2007 12:05 pm

"I am an ardent shopper at As Seen on TV network.
Everything I have ever bought has a) worked, b) been exactley as described on the show, c) I could not have bought it a lower price in any shop on the planet and d) I am their biggest fan. Don't deny yourself, just buy, buy buy...You will be so glad that you did....

" Just click on the red button on your remote and...

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Tue Jul 24, 2007 6:46 pm

...enjoy the guaranteed satisfaction!

You keep pushing the red button until you simply cannot enjoy any more. You say, "Guys, it's been a great pleasure, and you’ve done a fantastic job in terms of satisfaction, but I am afraid I am going to want my money back. Don't ask."
Now, it’s high time to meet the Seer…

AmpaSand · Post by **AmpaSand** » Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:16 pm

... (who is never refered to via pronoun and doesn't have a name) is standing behind smoked glass so (insert pronoun) have most of (insert pronoun) filtered out so (insert pronoun) 's eyes aren't damaged. (insert pronoun) begins to speak.. ".......

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:43 am

...this smoked glass must be soundproof glass, because although his lips are moving you can't hear what he is saying. You reach once again into your trusty leather knapsack and have a quick rummage for you lip-reading gadget...now where is it?...

Tribblemaker · Post by **Tribblemaker** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 1:39 pm

. . . Suddenly you feel excruciating pain in your right hand. Uh-oh, a waffle-beast has latched itself onto your arm and is inching closer to your face to stuff itself down your gullet, leaving a slimy trail of seedless strawberry jam. You leap up and down, shaking your arm vigorously, but the waffle will not let go! Unfortunately, the Seer doesn't notice. . .

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 5:04 pm

...that you are desperately fighting a waffle-beast. The Seer thinks you are using the Asteroid sign language, and vigorously shaking a hand in the Asteroid sign language means, "I totally agree, please go on", so the Seer thinks everything is cool and keeps blathering away.
Dripping slimy high-calorie jam all over the place, you try to body slam the beast and accidentally press the yellow button that says, “Ejection Seat”. You are propelled out of your saucer…

AmpaSand · Post by **AmpaSand** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:13 pm

....and the decompression disexplodes the waffle beast. After a quick flight to the upper atmosphere you return this time landing on the other side of the smoked grass, you look around to see....

Avane · Post by **Avane** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 10:22 am

...that The Seer, having given you the message [the one that will fix everything: life the universe...your evil twin] is rapidly disappearing into the distance. "Oy" you shout, "wait up a moment". He glances over his shoulder and hope rises in you. He's coming back... Uh, oh. Hmm well, yes, he is taking off like a rat from the proverbial trap. The clown rodeo outfit, the hippy beads had all seemed like such a good idea at the time. But with the red gooey blood-like jam from the waffle-monster smeared all over, you are one scarey sight. And just when you thought things couln't get any worse...

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 4:48 pm

...you notice that you are firmly glued to the asteroid surface. At that moment, you spot a squad of Dark Jedi running towards you. You think, "These dudes were probably returning malfunctioning lightsabers to As Seen on TV for a full refund, minus shipping and handling... Maybe they will help to unglue me from this dusty asteroid."