In relationships: things you can't do (no spam)

fable · Post by **fable** » Wed May 07, 2008 11:06 am

Have you ever had a SO who is so disturbed by something you do (get your mind out of the gutter--I don't mean that), that you are told politely but firmly to leave that chore alone? For example, shortly after my wife and I started cohabitating 20 years ago, she discovered that I felt being up to $5 off a month total in bank account reconciliation was perfectly fine. (I still believe this, by the way. Why waste an hour or more getting it absolutely right when you could be doing something more important?) So she's happy to take on check balancing, though I've repeatedly offered, since. She just doesn't trust anybody who can settle for being off like that. Which I find very odd.

What about you? And stop staring at me like that!

McBane · Post by **McBane** » Wed May 07, 2008 11:53 am

I am officially banned from painting any walls, ceilings, etc in our house. I myself extended that ban to include any prep work or cleaning after any painting.

Apparently, I'm not very good at it.

Luckily, this allows me with more time to enjoy a beverage and watch my wife paint.

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Wed May 07, 2008 8:52 pm

I officially banned myself from many tedious activities.

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Fri May 09, 2008 3:00 am

In my past relation, the girl was all about "decency" and "properness". Gaming was "improper" for a young adult. (I tried to explain her what the average age on GB [minus the KotOR and Fable boards

] was, but she was good at ignoring facts.) Not that I stopped gaming.
Lots of other things. Doing silly, funny things were off-limits.
Worst of all: sleeping with the window open, an absolut must for me, nearly got forbidden.

Coot · Post by **Coot** » Sat May 10, 2008 2:07 am

I always considered myself an able cook. After some weeks of sharing the cooking responsibilities I offered to prepare a meal again. She merely raised an eyebrow and said: "I feel we should divide the household chores a bit differently."
It's three years later and I still haven't recovered from that. I am allowed, however, to clean the toilet, so I still have my pride.

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Sat May 10, 2008 3:23 am

That reminds me... I like to cook and I'm pretty good at it, but I wasn't allowed to do it because it wasn't decent that a guy does the cooking. Women ought to do it. I was scowled at when I asked if that had something to do with cookers having a genetic lock on them which required two X chromosomes to unlock.

Monolith · Post by **Monolith** » Sat May 10, 2008 7:39 am

GawainBS wrote: Worst of all: sleeping with the window open, an absolut must for me, nearly got forbidden.

Oh yeah, I know that pretty well. I got her one of those thick and extremely isolating (and expensive) blankets and that helped. Took it with her when she left. Women. Should have forced her to take cold showers regularly. Works for me.

Another ex didn't like me cracking my fingers - and I do that a lot.

BlueSky · Post by **BlueSky** » Sat May 10, 2008 7:31 pm

There were so many things I couldn't do..it would be a list book length..:laugh:
but that's all in the past for me...

As for a friend of mine who has been recently apart from his wife,...
I visited him and he was scarfing down coconut candy bars, had a bag that would do a Halloween night....
asked why...
"She didn't allow coconut in the house."....:speech:

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Sun May 11, 2008 8:56 am

GawainBS wrote:That reminds me... I like to cook and I'm pretty good at it, but I wasn't allowed to do it because it wasn't decent that a guy does the cooking. Women ought to do it.

And that girl was from which century?

How then did she view all the famous male chefs at the restaurants with Michelin stars? They are obviously able to cook?

"Firmly but politely"? Hahahaha! Well, my ex-hubby told me to stay out of the kitchen because I just disturbed his cooking and his planning and destroyed things. Since he did all the cooking I was fine with that.

Apart from that I don't remember anything particular. I usually try to avoid having relationships with people who are disturbed by my behaviour

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Sun May 11, 2008 9:17 am

Problem is, most of these things only surface after knowing that person quite some time...

Tricky · Post by **Tricky** » Sun May 11, 2008 4:10 pm

Lecturing the kids when they did something wrong. I wasn't bad at it or anything, it's just that we didn't have any. I kept creeping her out.

One real one. I was not allowed to cook vegan food. I like vegan cuisine, but I cannot cook with it. I know it's all in the spices, but I just don't like to complicate a simple meal. Since we did live together for three years, it basically meant I never had to anything but the dishes. Best disability I ever had.

Thomas77 · Post by **Thomas77** » Mon May 12, 2008 8:47 pm

Yeah, I wish....

You know, I really can't think of anything that my wife actually "bans" me from.

I wish that were the case with at least one thing or another. But honestly, I can't think of anything. I really do most of the cooking, cleaning, yard work, bills, dog washing, and just about everything else. Now, I know what you're probably thinking, I've banned her from doing stuff...huh uh! In fact, I try to get her to do more things, but that doesn't seem to work too well.
Although, one thing does come to mind. When we by pictures and things for the walls, that's her area. She's the one who wants to decide where they go and how they're situated. But that process usually takes an extremely long time (months) and I wind up putting them up myself, only to have her take them right back down!

But I suppose that would be the only thing that I could think of....

Moonbiter · Post by **Moonbiter** » Tue May 13, 2008 9:29 am

I'm NEVER allowed to set the table. Period. Maybe it's because my wife can't boil eggs without burning the water, or because she's never home. If I prepare a nice dinner, she will change the plates (they don't fit the meal) the glasses (we need crystal for this) or even the location of the meal (what? We can't eat this here!) Even in the middle of the night: She comes home slightly sloshed and I've prepared a late-night snack while waiting up.... OOOONoooooo! "After all you've done, we can't possibly have that here!!!" Go figure....

Tamerlane · Post by **Tamerlane** » Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:12 am

Change music in car. I like rock/alternative music and she likes the urban/hip hop stuff. If its my car its my music and vice versa for her car. Oh and I can't upgrade my PC the way I used to, so no new high end graphics card every few months.