Help me, I'm moving to the US of A

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 6:57 pm

sparky_kat wrote: *sunscreen, sunscreen , sunscreen!!
*try to learn a little spanish (if you dont know any already) (it helps!)
*make sure the house/apt you move into has a GOOD cooling system (not just a a/c box hanging off the bedroom window)\
*ignore the self obsessed idoits

1) Sure, I hate but I'm used to using it.
2) Good idea, I don't speak Spanish. The hubby speaks a little.
3) Ok, I'll ask the uni to help me with that, they need to organise my housing before I arrive there.
4) I do that all the time here, hope it's not more difficult there.

Moonbiter] Be prepared to discuss your annual income and that of your neighbours absolutely all the time. Use the words wrote:
ROFL, I have to practise the blond think I think. What you say about fine arts is sad, though. I was hoping there might be some nice symphony orchestras.

Doctors don't come from Sweden, porn stars come from Sweden.
Well I can do both, but I am primarily in CA for medical stuff, not anatomical

Start jogging, or you'll be a social outcast. Get botoxed, even if you don't need it. Spas are a way of life. You can have skin like Helen of Troy, but you must spend at least 5 hours a week with mud in your face and cucumber on your eyes. These people bring their own vitaminized bottled water to restaurants so the chef can cook their broccoli according to their dietary plan.
I'll rather be the leprosy of the whole society that do these things! I can't do jogging, I have no menisci left after all those years of climbing and ballet, but honestly I hated it before, too. I've never been to a spa and I'd rather be in a 1x1x1m locked cubicle full of cockroaches. I have a skin that make people ask me what "products" I use (the answer is none) and I am not going to put mud and cucumber on my face since I am pretty convinced not seeing anything will severely decrease my ability to analyse brain images. If needs be and the start stoning me, I can bring my own broccoli - guess you can just buy it somewhere before entering the restaurant?

Get used to earthquakes. They're so common people hardly notice them, which is pretty bizarre for a Scandinavian.
That's ok, I've experienced a few earthquakes in geothermal areas.

I think the thing that really got to me was that to a Californian, to a larger extent than anywhere else in the USA, life is a constant competition.
...
You try to lead a non-materialistic life? I'll show you non-materialistic. Me'n my wife recycle condoms, I've used the same one since -87. What's you're golfing par at the moment? Really? Well I bench pressed 200 kilos at the gym this morning. Is that the new Mercedes? What'll that set you back? I'm thinking of getting the new BMW. Blah..blah..blah IT JUST WON'T STOP!
ROFL, it's horrible! Is there nothing you can do to stop this? Can't you just pretent to be a real looser as to convince them from the beginning that there is no competition? Or will that end up in a "who's the worst failure"-competition?

If you're going to live in LA and its environs, stock up on hepa filters. The pollution is truly nasty in that area, and you don't want a little one especially to suffer as a result.

And I don't mean Silur, of course.

ROFLMAO!

I hope he doesn't read that!

Vicsun] I missed you last time you were in Denmark wrote:
Yes, that was a pity, but there will be other times, we will have this collaboration with the Copenhagen lab for many years to come and COP is the Scandinavian hub so I can't avoid it even if I wished to!

Bad cook? That is a serious issue, I'm afraid. I have an abundance of excellent conversationlists around me, so let's see, what else...do you have a pretty ass?

Craig] Stay clear of crabs. Crabs be evil. [/quote wrote:
Can you eat them? The water-living, even larger, Kamchatka crab, is delicious.

Moonbiter · Post by **Moonbiter** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 6:03 am

C Elegans wrote:1)
ROFL, I have to practise the blond think I think. What you say about fine arts is sad, though. I was hoping there might be some nice symphony orchestras.
::::::::::
Or will that end up in a "who's the worst failure"-competition?
::::::::::
Can you eat them? The water-living, even larger, Kamchatka crab, is delicious.

There are plenty of decent orchestras, it's the people who go to see them who are prats. Oh, and they have bouncers at the opera, that was a first for me. Then again, in LA they have bouncers absolutely everywhere.

No, the "worst failure competition" isn't on, unless your failure isn't your own fault. People in LA never fail, and if they do it's always someone else's fault. It would probably become a "who's your best friend who helps you the most" -competition. *She had a problem, but I gave her the number to my shrink... Well I put her in contact with my real estate broker AND loaned her the money...* and so on...

As for the broccoli, you can't eat just any broccoli! :laugh:

The coconut crab is quite delicious, but sadly can't be found around LA. You can get crabs quite easily in LA, though....

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:29 am

Moonbiter wrote:There are plenty of decent orchestras, it's the people who go to see them who are prats. Oh, and they have bouncers at the opera, that was a first for me. Then again, in LA they have bouncers absolutely everywhere.

That's what I thought, so it's a pity if the audience is unbearable.

Bouncers? To protect them from what? Is there a legal age for going to the opera, or are the opera houses full of crack-heads who come there to rob the Beluga-dog food people in the audience?

No, the "worst failure competition" isn't on, unless your failure isn't your own fault. People in LA never fail, and if they do it's always someone else's fault. It would probably become a "who's your best friend who helps you the most" -competition. *She had a problem, but I gave her the number to my shrink... Well I put her in contact with my real estate broker AND loaned her the money...* and so on... As for the broccoli, you can't eat just any broccoli! :laugh:

Good, then I'll go with that. I can pretend to be a complete failure due to my own limitations. What is viewed as the worst possible failure? Being poor? Out of work? Stupid? Crazy? (Hi, I moved here just by chance because I couldn't get a job in Sweden, I'm mentally disabled, you see)?

The coconut crab is quite delicious, but sadly can't be found around LA. You can get crabs quite easily in LA, though....

Well, I wasn't planning to do the porn star stuff there, anyway.

Craig · Post by **Craig** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:36 pm

I'd give eating it ago, unless I was warned not to. I don't think I could o such magnificent Crustaceans though.

Also, watch out for androids.

Moonbiter · Post by **Moonbiter** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:28 pm

Craig wrote:I'd give eating it ago, unless I was warned not to. I don't think I could o such magnificent Crustaceans though.

Also, watch out for androids.

Craig, LSD is bad for you.

Craig · Post by **Craig** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 7:20 pm

You know there *are* androids in LA....At least one. They say he's form the future.

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Fri May 30, 2008 8:12 pm

Hello again, dear fellow SYM:ians. Now I have moved to LA. It still feels weird that I now live in the US.

Since Moonbiter solved my major problem with moving here - not being able to watch football - I have no worries. Westwood, where I live, is actually a surprisingly nice area. The lab where I am working is only a 10 minute walk from where I live, and UCLA campus is nice and quite pretty. Now I only need to get used to the bloody Fahrenheit and get all my Kafkaesque immigration procedures done!

fable · Post by **fable** » Fri May 30, 2008 10:39 pm

Great. You're almost assimilated. So, when you are going to run out and buy your first gun?

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Sat May 31, 2008 1:06 am

fable wrote:Great. You're almost assimilated. So, when you are going to run out and buy your first gun?

Yeah..but she won't be truly assimilated unless she buys the gun at Walmart....

fable · Post by **fable** » Sat May 31, 2008 7:15 am

dragon wench wrote:Yeah..but she won't be truly assimilated unless she buys the gun at Walmart....

Alas, Walmart's not very liked, these days. Sad, indeed!

CE, avoid traveling too far north, or you'll run into The Land of Bush II. Though if he keeps hiring people who are every bit as competent as Bush's pals, he may not last very long.

Cuchulain82 · Post by **Cuchulain82** » Sat May 31, 2008 8:47 am

C Elegans wrote:Hello again, dear fellow SYM:ians. Now I have moved to LA. It still feels weird that I now live in the US.

Since Moonbiter solved my major problem with moving here - not being able to watch football - I have no worries. Westwood, where I live, is actually a surprisingly nice area. The lab where I am working is only a 10 minute walk from where I live, and UCLA campus is nice and quite pretty. Now I only need to get used to the bloody Fahrenheit and get all my Kafkaesque immigration procedures done!

Welcome CE! I hope you find your time in the US enjoyable.

I'm across the country and have never been that far west, so you know more about LA than I do. However, you should really try to get out and about in California, once you get settled in. California is something of a legend to New England types like myself- it's a mystical land where the people are blonde, the weather is always nice, the wine country is amazing... it's something of a sunny Shangri-La.

Also, I agree with Fable (in all his facetious glory)- you should buy a gun. Seriously. I mean... you're here- why not? When I was in the Philippines I ate balut and sisig, and studied filipino stick fighting. You should shoot and see if you like it.

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Sat May 31, 2008 10:03 am

fable wrote:Alas, Walmart's not very liked, these days. Sad, indeed!

CE, avoid traveling too far north, or you'll run into The Land of Bush II. Though if he keeps hiring people who are every bit as competent as Bush's pals, he may not last very long.

But you can't deny that Walmart is a fixture of suburban North American culture

(yes, we have em up here too)
Seriously, I know a great deal about the nastiness of Walmart...wouldn't set foot in the place if I was paid.

As far as Baby Bush goes... Good God, I truly hope he won't last very long.. The man is an embarrassment *sigh*

LMAO @ Cuch!
I can just see CE toting a gun in a holster, complete with cowboy hat.. Oh ...wait.. that's Texas..

Lady Dragonfly · Post by **Lady Dragonfly** » Sat May 31, 2008 3:20 pm

Don't listen to them, CE. Walmart, yeah, right.

You want to go to a gun show, trust me. At a gun show, find an unlicensed gun dealer. The unlicensed ones are not required to run any background checks so they'd sell guns to criminals, crazies, and, well... foreigners. I am not saying the licensed dealers would not do the same; they can forget to run a background check, sometimes. Who would blame them? They are humans after all. Sorta.

And remember, sunny California is the place where Mickey Mouse, blondes, drug junkies and child molesters feel equally at home.

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Sat May 31, 2008 11:55 pm

fable wrote:Great. You're almost assimilated. So, when you are going to run out and buy your first gun?

As soon as I have recovered from Der Process, I'll go get myself a gun and start saying "Oh my gaaaawd" all the time

Maybe I should even get a TV.

I've never seen so many nail-polishing or whatever-it-is-they do-shops in all my life before. LA citizens must have a lot of problems with their nails.

fable wrote: CE, avoid traveling too far north, or you'll run into The Land of Bush II. Though if he keeps hiring people who are every bit as competent as Bush's pals, he may not last very long.

Isn't it fascinating to realise that this is the consequence of democracy, the pinnacle of political systems?

dragon wench wrote:But you can't deny that Walmart is a fixture of suburban North American culture (yes, we have em up here too)
Seriously, I know a great deal about the nastiness of Walmart...wouldn't set foot in the place if I was paid.

What's so special with Walmart? I haven't been to one, but I thought it was just food store?

I can just see CE toting a gun in a holster, complete with cowboy hat.. Oh ...wait.. that's Texas..

I'm actually going to visit Texas later. I have a friend who is doing a PhD in biomaths at Austin University, and I've promised to visit him. That will be...interesting.

Cuchulain82 wrote:Welcome CE! I hope you find your time in the US enjoyable.

Thanks! I am sure I will enjoy the research projects I am going to work with. And visiting some fellow SYM:ians who are on this side of the pond! I'll try to see more of area later, right now I have no time for anything else than work and the immigration procedures.

Also, I agree with Fable (in all his facetious glory)- you should buy a gun. Seriously. I mean... you're here- why not? When I was in the Philippines I ate balut and sisig, and studied filipino stick fighting. You should shoot and see if you like it.

I would buy a gun - if I was a free-lancing war reporter on my own in Chad. Save that, no.

I did shooting as a sport when I was younger. I didn't like it much though.

Lady Dragonfly wrote: You want to go to a gun show, trust me. At a gun show, find an unlicensed gun dealer. The unlicensed ones are not required to run any background checks so they'd sell guns to criminals, crazies, and, well... foreigners. I am not saying the licensed dealers would not do the same; they can forget to run a background check, sometimes. Who would blame them? They are humans after all. Sorta.

And remember, sunny California is the place where Mickey Mouse, blondes, drug junkies and child molesters feel equally at home.

And here I was trying to think positively and figuring it's not so bad to live in California after all

Maharlika · Post by **Maharlika** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 5:23 pm

Hmmm... LA? Great.

This season, the Los Angeles Lakers are in the NBA Finals!

GO LAKERS!!!

Is Silur and the little princess with you now? Wish you guys well. Hopefully we could get to meet again soon.

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 8:09 pm

@Mahar: I am actually completely uninterested in basketball, but don't tell that to anyone around here...

Silur and the little one will join me on Saturday. Silur left it to me to arrange housing before he arrives, whereas I left it to him to fly 15 hours - and pass the US security - with a 1-year old

At least I hope that the (Swedish) secretary at the US embassy in Stockholm is right. She looked at Alex and dryly said "I think that she's too small to be considered a security threat even by the US goverment".

Tamerlane · Post by **Tamerlane** » Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:16 am

Hi CE

So you've reached the land of the movie stars. Your thread was a fascinating read and best of luck with everyone there.