Can you kill your DM?

Tiberius James · Post by **Tiberius James** » Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:53 am

So, my best friend is the DM, and I love to screw with him, while his number one goal is to make our lives as complicated as possible, my job is to make his life as complecated as possible.

I want to KILL MY DM! There has to be a way. I have to know, even if I can't kill him, I want to scare him. I need to know the most creative ways to screw with him without pissing everybody or him off.

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:56 am

Here's what you do. You and at least three or four friends who can help hold him down buy a straight jacket and get him fixed up in this. Use Ducttape to pry his eyes open and then eye drops to reduce itching.

Now, after you get him affixed to the straight jacket and pry his eyes open, take him to a theater Legally Blonde 2: Red White and Blond, now if he's serene and inert, reward him with the eyedrops, and if he's going crazy, reward him with a bullet in the face.

Tiberius James · Post by **Tiberius James** » Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:28 pm

tried that. Didn't work.

seriously though, He at one point mentioned that in one of the dementions in his world is reality, so I really just want to destroy the world, i mean, I have 2 bags of holding so of course I could destroy the universe like that, but I want to find a way to kill, basically, the God of the world.

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Mon Aug 18, 2008 1:44 pm

Unfortunately, Bags of Holding don't work like that, and even with the portable hole/bag of holding trick, it doesn't destroy everything. Just a small section of where the bag and hole are.

As for "The god of the universe" most D&D games have multiple deities and killing them is normally impossible considering they are gods (but since WoTC had to go and screw things up by adding statistics to gods, check out the Deities and Demigods book, or if in Forgotten Realms, Faiths and Pantheons).

Although, unless you're around 100th level, you don't have a chance in hell of destroying anything.

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Tue Aug 19, 2008 3:13 am

Actually,this is a situation that calls for Pun-pun. If you don't know him, Google him.

Dysnomia · Post by **Dysnomia** » Sun Aug 24, 2008 3:21 am

Once I had a DM I didn't much like. He didn't control the game very well, and constantly railroaded us into difficult and annoying situations regardless of what we wanted to do, never letting us make any meaningful decisions about what happened.

I had my character, over some time, gather lots of kinds of small explosive materials, acids, flammable liquids etc. and store them in his cloak which had a function similar, though not identical, to a bag of holding. I waited until my various items added up to about 15,000 points of cumulative damage. I did this very inconspicuously, only buying a few things at a time, burying them with other purchases.

After meeting an NPC that the campaign revolved around, in a section of town that the campaign hinged upon, I summoned my wings from my Falcon Spaulders to fly to the next area I was being forced to go to. Said,

Me: "I fly to my maximum height to get a good look around the city"
DM: "OK"
Me:"Can I still see my contact?"
DM: "I guess so, he's still by the fountain"
Me: "I empty my cloak"
DM: "What?"
Me: "Remember all the explosives I've been storing in my cloak? I'm torching this place"
DM: "You can't"
Me: "Watch me..."

The other players backed me up and that was the end of the campaign.

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Sun Aug 24, 2008 10:39 am

A way to seriously mess with the DM's world-

The Locate City Bomb-

1: Take Locate City, a spell with a range of ten miles per level (Races of Destiny, 1st level spell)
2: Apply Snowcasting (Frostburn) to it, making it a [Cold] spell
3: Apply Flash Frost (PHBII) to it, making it deal 2 cold damage to everything in the area
4:Apply Energy Substitution (CArc) to it, making it an electric spell
5: Apply Born of the Three Thunders to it, allowing a reflex save to avoid the damage and changing the damage type
6: Apply Explosive Spell to it, forcing a second Reflex save to avoid being blasted to the edge of the area and 1d6(?) per ten feet traveled

After all the modifications to this spell, you not only force everyone out of a ten mile radius per level area at immediate terminal velocity, this ungodly sick combination only requires a 4th level slot for a sorcerer/wizard.

Have fun!

Fiberfar · Post by **Fiberfar** » Sun Aug 24, 2008 12:05 pm

@ Sib: If I ever get time to play again (damn university taking up all my gaming time

), I'll do that upon reaching 7th level with a Wizard.

kevin video · Post by **kevin video** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 3:44 pm

Tiberius James wrote:tried that. Didn't work.

seriously though, He at one point mentioned that in one of the dementions in his world is reality, so I really just want to destroy the world, i mean, I have 2 bags of holding so of course I could destroy the universe like that, but I want to find a way to kill, basically, the God of the world.

Do you know the exact damage of what that would do? Or where I could find the numbers for how much damage cutting a bag of holding?

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 3:50 pm

Again people, one or two bags of holding, damaging them or cutting them up or placing them inside each other do NOTHING. They don't explode, they don't do damage, they don't do anything except drop all the components inside if you destroy it.

A portable hole and bag of holding has two different effects, but neither of them explode or destroy the universe. One is an instant kill to anything within 10 feet of it for 1 round, the other is an explosion of a few D6 in damage in a 10 foot radius.

Think about it. If the sphere of annihilation isn't a black hole that destroys the universe, then two simple magic items wouldn't be.

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 4:48 pm

Siberys wrote:Again people, one or two bags of holding, damaging them or cutting them up or placing them inside each other do NOTHING. They don't explode, they don't do damage, they don't do anything except drop all the components inside if you destroy it.

A portable hole and bag of holding has two different effects, but neither of them explode or destroy the universe. One is an instant kill to anything within 10 feet of it for 1 round, the other is an explosion of a few D6 in damage in a 10 foot radius.

Think about it. If the sphere of annihilation isn't a black hole that destroys the universe, then two simple magic items wouldn't be.

Isn't it putting the portable hole in the bag of holding that produces that effect?

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Wed Sep 17, 2008 9:10 pm

GawainBS wrote:Isn't it putting the portable hole in the bag of holding that produces that effect?

Putting a portable hole in a bag of holding produces one.
Putting a bag of holding in a portable hole produces the other.

Fiberfar · Post by **Fiberfar** » Thu Sep 18, 2008 3:00 am

Siberys wrote: Putting a bag of holding in a portable hole produces the other.

So jumping into a portable hole with a bag of holding on your person is a no go?

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Thu Sep 18, 2008 11:17 am

Fiberfar wrote:So jumping into a portable hole with a bag of holding on your person is a no go?

Heh, nope. Even if there was no explosive or implosive effect, you'd still suffocate in there.

Sanick Lore · Post by **Sanick Lore** » Thu Oct 30, 2008 3:09 pm

They all DIED

So i have a sad...Sad story of a campaign ending...In a giant Fireball. I was Dming a Camp that reached level 16 in 6 months (we played EVERY Friday night to Sunday afternoon) they ran into a cave on their way to deliver magical items to another wizard in the town. The cave had undead which the cleric noticed right away. long story short they fought a few zombies and a mummy lord with +1 armor and +3 helm. Mind you mummy rot can transfer to items. The monk Picks up the helm...His hands shrivel. cleric fixes and the monk says "Stupid Helm" And crushes it...

Everyone had 1 +2 item and a +1 items, and the quest items were +4 items. Every person i nthe party had a ionu stone and or some sort of magical bag or ring....It was a BIG explosion

GawainBS · Post by **GawainBS** » Thu Oct 30, 2008 3:39 pm

Sanick Lore wrote:So i have a sad...Sad story of a campaign ending...In a giant Fireball. I was Dming a Camp that reached level 16 in 6 months (we played EVERY Friday night to Sunday afternoon) they ran into a cave on their way to deliver magical items to another wizard in the town. The cave had undead which the cleric noticed right away. long story short they fought a few zombies and a mummy lord with +1 armor and +3 helm. Mind you mummy rot can transfer to items. The monk Picks up the helm...His hands shrivel. cleric fixes and the monk says "Stupid Helm" And crushes it...

Everyone had 1 +2 item and a +1 items, and the quest items were +4 items. Every person i nthe party had a ionu stone and or some sort of magical bag or ring....It was a BIG explosion

I don't get it. The cleric crushes the helm. So? Why do things have to explode? On a side note: lvl 16 and those were the only items? Sounds like a screwed up wealth by level...

Sanick Lore · Post by **Sanick Lore** » Fri Oct 31, 2008 1:26 pm

Since i have been playing, magical items explode if broken or crushed in a manner that does not include an armor smith and his equipment. A magical explosion can cause other items to explode...and so on. The reason they had so few items is i believe they pawned off half of their euipment to buy a tavern and a few horses to travel on.

Siberys · Post by **Siberys** » Fri Oct 31, 2008 3:30 pm

Since i have been playing, magical items explode if broken or crushed in a manner that does not include an armor smith and his equipment. A magical explosion can cause other items to explode...and so on. The reason they had so few items is i believe they pawned off half of their euipment to buy a tavern and a few horses to travel on.

Two things....

Why? Magic items have never exploded upon destruction. The magic just dissipates.

And what is a +3 helm?

Sanick Lore · Post by **Sanick Lore** » Sat Nov 01, 2008 8:09 am

I dont remember the exact name of it, but its either a +2 or +3 attachment to a helm. Like a faceplate and what it does is grants the wearer bonus ac, cant be flanked, and Dark Vision. I'll find it in the Palladium book and tell you what it is. And i am sure that it actually should be played as the magic just dissipates, but like i said. My first Dm who has been playing for about 35 years used magic causes small explosions when destroyed by something other than an armor/weapon smith and his equipment or a barbarian breaks it.

Pellinore · Post by **Pellinore** » Sat Nov 01, 2008 11:33 am

My first Dm who has been playing for about 35 years used magic causes small explosions when destroyed by something other than an armor/weapon smith and his equipment or a barbarian breaks it.

That is a house rule. I have been playing since 1978 and have never seen that rule. Now, a Potion of Fiery Burning or Potion of Explosions or the like could easily have that side effect.