How would a certain person throw a bike on a roof?
Medium-level student:
Throws the bike on the roof
High-level student:
Calculates how he can throw the bike on the roof
Low-level student:
Doesn´t know how to throw the bike on the roof
Criminal:
Throws a stolen bike on the roof
Social worker:
Advises a problematic child how to throw the bike on the roof
Hooligan:
Destroyes the bike and then throws it on the roof
Schyzofrenic:
Throws multiple bikes on the roof
Work-a-holic:
Throws all the bikes in the region on the roof
Artist:
Makes a painting of himself throwing the bike on the roof
Violent person:
Throws the bike AND it´s owner on the roof, climbs up, and then throws both back
Governmental worker:
First studies the law for throwing bikes on the roof, than starts a complicated procedure which enables him to throw the bike on the roof without any risk of procecution, than compares it with other options, agrees to do it and proudly notifies the newspapers, but then changes his mind because his work is not supposed to be physical or dirty (says the general contract for governmental workers)
Footballplayer:
Kicks the bike on the roof
Drunk:
Falls in an attempt to throw the bike on the roof
Baldurs Gate player:
Casts teleport field on the bike and teleports it to the roof
Historican:
Looks at the past experiences of throwing bikes on the roof
Communist:
Shouts "For Russia" while he and 20 comrads throw the bike on the roof
Visually handicapped person:
Throws the bike on another roof
.............................. Who knows more???
..... And how would YOU throw the bike on a roof???
..... And how would YOU throw the bike on a roof???
There's no knowledge that's not POWER!!!!
"Power is the ability to control the actions of others, regardless of their wishes" et al, Cohen
-and right you were, mate!
"Power is the ability to control the actions of others, regardless of their wishes" et al, Cohen
-and right you were, mate!
-
fable
- Posts: 30676
- Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2001 12:00 pm
- Location: The sun, the moon, and the stars.
- Contact:
Originally posted by NiteWulf
How would a certain person throw a bike on a roof?
Schyzofrenic:
Throws multiple bikes on the roof
I think you may be confusing schizophrenia with MPD (multiple personality disorder). Someone who has MPD would be inclined to throw multiple bikes on the roof, in various ways. A schizophrenic would be inclined to throw a bicycle on the roof after the God of Bicycles told them to do so.
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.
Re: Re: ..... And how would YOU throw the bike on a roof???
Technically, a schizophrenic may or may not throw the bike on the roof depending on which polarity they were on. If under normal circumstances, then the bike tossing protocol would probably default to their profession as discussed above. If schizo at the time, then they would or would not depending on what the god of bicycles told them to do. ..just felt that needed to be made clear..
Originally posted by fable
I think you may be confusing schizophrenia with MPD (multiple personality disorder). <snip> A schizophrenic would be inclined to throw a bicycle on the roof after the God of Bicycles told them to do so.
Technically, a schizophrenic may or may not throw the bike on the roof depending on which polarity they were on. If under normal circumstances, then the bike tossing protocol would probably default to their profession as discussed above. If schizo at the time, then they would or would not depending on what the god of bicycles told them to do. ..just felt that needed to be made clear..
Ex-Member, Clan of One
Evil Gnome Cult
Evil Gnome Cult
Paranoid: Afraid the bike is out to get him, Climbs on roof to avoid being caught by bike.
Bipolar: Prepares setting, gathers materials, goes shopping and buys expensive bike and just the right outfit for bike tossing. Buys several tools and impliments that might come in handy for the job. Picks up a few more items while standing in the check out line. Subscribes to "Bike Throwers Illustrated". Checks out a book and reads up on bikes and bike tossing. Calls several friends and throws a bike tossing party. Orders catering. Pays with credit card because he is now out of money.Throws bike on roof, carefully making sure that it is done to perfection.
Becomes depressed because he is sure he could have done a better job. Goes to bed for a week.
Bipolar: Prepares setting, gathers materials, goes shopping and buys expensive bike and just the right outfit for bike tossing. Buys several tools and impliments that might come in handy for the job. Picks up a few more items while standing in the check out line. Subscribes to "Bike Throwers Illustrated". Checks out a book and reads up on bikes and bike tossing. Calls several friends and throws a bike tossing party. Orders catering. Pays with credit card because he is now out of money.Throws bike on roof, carefully making sure that it is done to perfection.
Becomes depressed because he is sure he could have done a better job. Goes to bed for a week.
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
Originally posted by NiteWulf
How would a certain person throw a bike on a roof?
Medium-level student:
Throws the bike on the roof
High-level student:
Calculates how he can throw the bike on the roof
Low-level student:
Doesn´t know how to throw the bike on the roof
Criminal:
Throws a stolen bike on the roof
Social worker:
Advises a problematic child how to throw the bike on the roof
Hooligan:
Destroyes the bike and then throws it on the roof
Schyzofrenic:
Throws multiple bikes on the roof
Work-a-holic:
Throws all the bikes in the region on the roof
Artist:
Makes a painting of himself throwing the bike on the roof
Violent person:
Throws the bike AND it´s owner on the roof, climbs up, and then throws both back *Cough* RandomThug *cough*
Governmental worker:
First studies the law for throwing bikes on the roof, than starts a complicated procedure which enables him to throw the bike on the roof without any risk of procecution, than compares it with other options, agrees to do it and proudly notifies the newspapers, but then changes his mind because his work is not supposed to be physical or dirty (says the general contract for governmental workers)
Footballplayer:
Kicks the bike on the roof
Drunk:
Falls in an attempt to throw the bike on the roof
Baldurs Gate player:
Casts teleport field on the bike and teleports it to the roof
Historican:
Looks at the past experiences of throwing bikes on the roof
Communist:
Shouts "For Russia" while he and 20 comrads throw the bike on the roof
Visually handicapped person:
Throws the bike on another roof
.............................. Who knows more???
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
Norman Vincent Peale: Envision the bike succesfully located upon the roof
Existentialist: Contemplate the futility of attempting to hurl the bike onto the roof. Conclude that for him, the ideal is to throw bike behind bushes. Compose a poem about the experience.
Existentialist: Contemplate the futility of attempting to hurl the bike onto the roof. Conclude that for him, the ideal is to throw bike behind bushes. Compose a poem about the experience.
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
-
fable
- Posts: 30676
- Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2001 12:00 pm
- Location: The sun, the moon, and the stars.
- Contact:
Originally posted by Scayde
Norman Vincent Peale: Envision the bike succesfully located upon the roof
Existentialist: Contemplate the futility of attempting to hurl the bike onto the roof. Conclude that for him, the ideal is to throw bike behind bushes. Compose a poem about the experience.
Fundamentalist: Raptures the bike onto the roof.
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.
Good ones @ Gwally and fable *Sniggle*
Salesman: Set up bike dispaly on roof and convince neighbors that for three monthly instalments of 39.99, they too can have a bike on their roof.
*Sniggle*Salesman: Set up bike dispaly on roof and convince neighbors that for three monthly instalments of 39.99, they too can have a bike on their roof.
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
Mid-level manager:
After several 9am meetings re: Project - Bike on Roof, decides to bring in an outside consultant. Consultant recommends hiring professional thrower who specializes in bikes. Professional thrower throws bike on roof, charges $5000 for 2 minutes work.
Johnny Knoxville:
Uses homemade catapult to throw bike onto roof, with him on it. Wearing panda suit and on fire, rides bike off roof into kiddie pool filled with sewage and razor blades.
Teamster:
Insists that, while throwing the bike onto the roof does fall within his job description, lifting the bike into position to be thrown does not. Asks that you bring in rep from local Lifters Union 582 for that segment of the job.
After several 9am meetings re: Project - Bike on Roof, decides to bring in an outside consultant. Consultant recommends hiring professional thrower who specializes in bikes. Professional thrower throws bike on roof, charges $5000 for 2 minutes work.
Johnny Knoxville:
Uses homemade catapult to throw bike onto roof, with him on it. Wearing panda suit and on fire, rides bike off roof into kiddie pool filled with sewage and razor blades.
Teamster:
Insists that, while throwing the bike onto the roof does fall within his job description, lifting the bike into position to be thrown does not. Asks that you bring in rep from local Lifters Union 582 for that segment of the job.
You will run afoul of both a common misconception and a family of bears.
General - orders bike on the roof. When the bike fails to comply, the general has the bike taken by overwhelming force. Operation declared a success, general awarded Bronze Star.
There's nothing a little poison couldn't cure...
What happened here was the gradual habituation of the people, ... to receiving decisions deliberated in secret; to believing that the situation was so complicated that the government had to act on information which the people could not understand, or so dangerous that, even if he people could understand it, it could not be released because of national security.
What happened here was the gradual habituation of the people, ... to receiving decisions deliberated in secret; to believing that the situation was so complicated that the government had to act on information which the people could not understand, or so dangerous that, even if he people could understand it, it could not be released because of national security.
*sniggle* @ Sojourner
Six Sigma: Develope a team for evaluating the eficiency of current methods. Build a mock-up to scale of bike and roof. break down the process into as many steps as possible. Select each step and devise alternatives testing each variable against the standard. Plot efficiency of variables against non-variables one at a time. Rework combinations until each step has been designated as variable, and tested against standards of variation. Compute findings. Graph findings. Select most efficient variables and construct new protocol. Try to evaluate why bike no longer landson roof, but is hurled into neighbors yard. Designate project as human error. Return to previous designe. Fire team. Add reflectors to bike as safety measure.
declaire project a success.
Six Sigma: Develope a team for evaluating the eficiency of current methods. Build a mock-up to scale of bike and roof. break down the process into as many steps as possible. Select each step and devise alternatives testing each variable against the standard. Plot efficiency of variables against non-variables one at a time. Rework combinations until each step has been designated as variable, and tested against standards of variation. Compute findings. Graph findings. Select most efficient variables and construct new protocol. Try to evaluate why bike no longer landson roof, but is hurled into neighbors yard. Designate project as human error. Return to previous designe. Fire team. Add reflectors to bike as safety measure.
declaire project a success.
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
Originally posted by Gwalchmai
What is a Six Sigma? (I thought at first it might be a sorority house....
LOL...Six Sigma is the new corporate quality control darling. Companies are hiring these guys to sit around, crunch numbers and brainstorm ways to improve efficiency.
LOL...The things they come up with usually cause as much confusion as anything else.
Here is another link.
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong
Originally posted by Gwalchmai
Ah. I figured it might be something like that as I read the rest of your post. Imagine my disappointment...
LOL...Sorry Gwally......*HUG*
I guess I could wear my school girl outfit if that would make you feel better
Scayde Moody
(Pronounced Shayde)
The virtue of self sacrifice is the lie perpetuated by the weak to enslave the strong