Blame my twisted sense of humour, but I found this pretty funny
Why Parents Drink
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped
up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad." With the worst
premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with
my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have
been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you
would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight
motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's
not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very
happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the
whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has
opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll
be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live
nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science
will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't
worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure
that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
Love, Your Son John
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just
wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
I could almost see my own kid doing something like this... :laugh:
Spoiler
testingtest12
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. Spoiler
testingtest12
.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain.
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]ONLY RETARDED PEOPLE WRITE WITH CAPS ON. Good thing I press shift [/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]Bah! Bunch of lamers! Ye need the lesson of the true powergamer: Play mages, name them Koffi Annan, and only use non-intervention spells! Buwahahahahah![/QUOTE]
LMAO! makes me wonder if i would ever get a letter like that from my son when he gets to be that age. very very awesome!
Smile.... That way they wont know what your thinking
[QUOTE=Tricky;990202]I can't really tell if I can't read that because I'm too drunk or because you are. [/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Claudius;990251]Lets hope it was both of us [/QUOTE]
Oh hell yeah, that was hilarious! I haven't laughed this hard in a LONG time. Thanks for sharing.
Listen up maggots, Mr. Popo's 'bout to teach you the pecking order.
It goes you, the dirt, the worms inside of the dirt, Popo's stool, Kami, then Popo.
~Mr. Popo, Dragonball Z Abridged
Hysterical.... It's sounds like something I would do.
[QUOTE=Tricky;914030]I want the world to become more appreciative of carefully constructed spam. The art of saying absolutely nothing with many beautiful words is the closest you can get to poetry without meaning. That's life, really. Spagnificant.[/QUOTE]
The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.
“The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially.”
Ah, yes. The ugly monster finally rears its head. Without liquid, mankind can't survive. And what better liquid nourishment than good ol' alcohol.
Thankfully both of my parents are fantastic and neither drink. Though my mom has a pretty low alcohol tolerance level. Couple of drops and she goes cross eyed and rosy cheeked.
Love is just a chemical. We give it meaning by choice ~ Eleanor Lamb, Bioshock 2: Sea of Dreams
Loki[D.d.G] wrote:If it deters you from drinking, you can probably add a couple more :laugh:
I drink, therefore I am.
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]ONLY RETARDED PEOPLE WRITE WITH CAPS ON. Good thing I press shift [/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]Bah! Bunch of lamers! Ye need the lesson of the true powergamer: Play mages, name them Koffi Annan, and only use non-intervention spells! Buwahahahahah![/QUOTE]
Loki[D.d.G] wrote:If you drink excessively, thats bad....
Don't destroy my altered "Descartes' Cognito argument"
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]ONLY RETARDED PEOPLE WRITE WITH CAPS ON. Good thing I press shift [/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Luis Antonio]Bah! Bunch of lamers! Ye need the lesson of the true powergamer: Play mages, name them Koffi Annan, and only use non-intervention spells! Buwahahahahah![/QUOTE]
