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The Cynics Corner Club (spam only on topic please)

Anything goes... just keep it clean.
Fiona

Post by Fiona »

Veni, vidi, latui

Lestat :D
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Phreddie
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Post by Phreddie »

Every man has a certain amount of greed called common sense, some are just have more sense than others.
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
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ik911
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Post by ik911 »

"Idealism is what precedes experience. Cynism is what follows." - Corbeau
[size=-1]An optimist is a badly informed pessimist.[/size]
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Chimaera182
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Post by Chimaera182 »

“Without the arts, what distinguishes us from animals, right?” “Well, let’s see. Animals don’t feel the need to suck up to wealthier animals.”
-Daria
General: "Those aren't ideas; those are special effects."
Michael Bay: "I don't understand the difference."
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Robnark
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Post by Robnark »

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.

George Bernard Shaw
Here where the flattering and mendacious swarm
Of lying epitaths their secrets keep,
At last incapable of further harm
The lewd forefathers of the village sleep.
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TonyMontana1638
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Post by TonyMontana1638 »

I'm frefraining from spamming this thread with an ungodly number of Richard Lewis quotes, but I don't know how long I'll be able to last... Chew on these in the meantime

"Men are to the Gods as flies are to wanton boys, they kill us for sport."
-William Shakespeare

(1)"What do they do?"
(2)"They don't do anything sir, they're nihilists."
(1)"Huh, that must be exhausting."
-(2)Phillip Seymour Hoffman and (1)Jeff Bridges, The Big Lebowski

This is quite possibly the most depressing quote ever, courtesy of the genius existentialist Franz Kafka... taken from a love letter he wrote.

"Nor is it perhaps really love when I say that for me you are the most beloved; love is to me that you are the knife which I turn within myself."
-Letters to Milena

And another great Kafka quote

"There is only the spiritual word; what we call the physical world is the evil and in the spiritual one."

Doesn't get much worse than that, eh? Can't really even call it cynicism...
"Be thankful you're healthy."
"Be bitter you're not going to stay that way."
"Be glad you're even alive."
"Be furious you're going to die."
"Things could be much worse."
"They could be one hell of a lot better."
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Phreddie
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Post by Phreddie »

Bump, To: Tony myself and others. Use this thread for all cynical quotes.
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
Voltaire
[QUOTE=Xandax]Color me purple and call me barney.[/QUOTE]
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TonyMontana1638
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Location: Chasing nuns out in the yard

Post by TonyMontana1638 »

[QUOTE=Phreddie]Bump, To: Tony myself and others. Use this thread for all cynical quotes.[/QUOTE]

Wonderful! More cynical goodness...

"All murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets."
-Voltaire

I suppose the quote from my sig works darn well... No, no, not slade's quote... :D

"Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time."
-George Carlin
"Be thankful you're healthy."
"Be bitter you're not going to stay that way."
"Be glad you're even alive."
"Be furious you're going to die."
"Things could be much worse."
"They could be one hell of a lot better."
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Chimaera182
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Post by Chimaera182 »

[QUOTE=Fiona]Another from H L Mencken

"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under"[/QUOTE]
I know I am. :p

This is kind of depressing, but I suppose it's true when you think about it. But I used to be an avid hater of drug abusers, until a few years ago...

"Addicts are the ones who realize all hope of actual happiness lies not in life but in leaving it for brief periods."

P.S. not that I should be hawking this or whatever, but the night I got blitzed on alcohol and then got high on weed was the happiest night of my life, so I genuinely believe the above.
General: "Those aren't ideas; those are special effects."
Michael Bay: "I don't understand the difference."
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darkeningfire
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Post by darkeningfire »

Nothing so focuses a man's mind as the thought of being hung first thing in the morning.
-- Dr. Samuel Johnson

Every man needs something to believe in. I believe I'll have another drink.
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
-- W.C. Fields

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt
-- Groucho Marx

I love the smell of Napalm in the morning. It's the smell of victory.
-- Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore (Robert Duvall, Apocalypse Now)

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner.

A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
-- H.L. Mencken
Mistah Kurtz, he dead.
Fiona

Post by Fiona »

Robert Burns is said to have watched as a sailor jumped into the harbour to rescue a rich man who had fallen into the water. As a reward, the rich man gave his rescuer a shilling. The crowd became angry at the small amount but Burns observed :

"This gentleman is the best judge of the value of his own life".
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Lestat
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Post by Lestat »

Read this in a story by Oscar Wilde:
"The World is a stage, but the play is badly cast"
I think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.
- Oscar Wilde
The church is near but the road is icy; the bar is far away but I'll walk carefully.
- Russian proverb
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